


Two Blinks for Yes, One Blink for I'm Going to Drag You to the Bottom of the Sea

by Le_kunokimchi



Series: You're the Tim to My Tam [1]
Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Awkward Crush, Awkward Sexual Situations, Bang Chan is Whipped, Bang Chan is a Mess, Bang Chan is a Panicked Gay, Bang Chan-centric, Emotional Manipulation, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Freeform, Human Bang Chan, Insecure Lee Felix (Stray Kids), Lee Felix is Bad at Feelings (Stray Kids), Lee Felix is a Little Shit (Stray Kids), Light Angst, M/M, My First Work in This Fandom, Shy Bang Chan, Siren Lee Felix, Siren Lore, Slow Burn, Weird Biology
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-21
Updated: 2021-02-14
Packaged: 2021-03-11 05:40:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 44,321
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28230027
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Le_kunokimchi/pseuds/Le_kunokimchi
Summary: “How am I supposed to help you if I can’t touch you? Unless all you needed from me was to open the tank…”Their nostrils exhale harshly, droplets of water spraying out as they narrow their eyes again. “Only when I say so,” the mer growls, hauling themselves further out of the water with the sheer strength of their arms. “Come closer, human.”The man’s eyes widened curiously, taking a step towards the tank before the mer lowered their upper torso over the side until Chan could see nothing but their icy blue eyes and shark-like teeth inches from his face. They mumble, “When I touch you, don’t pull away.”“What-” he didn’t get a chance to finish before a pair of pink, plump lips cut him off.(OR the one where Chan just wanted to take some photos of fish on a relaxing trip in a glass-bottom boat rental. Instead, he picked up an alluring yet unlikely houseguest along the way that may or may not kill him before the week is over)
Relationships: Bang Chan/Lee Felix, Minor or Background Relationship(s)
Series: You're the Tim to My Tam [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2067957
Comments: 42
Kudos: 129





	1. Caught On a Crimson Lure

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! I'm kind of new to Stay, discovered Stray Kids about three months ago and have been hooked on them ever since!  
> I absolutely adore my Aussie boys and think that chanlix and minsung are some of the cutest ships in kpop so here I am writing a fanfic! 
> 
> Felix is going to take a while to warm up and Chan is pretty much whipped from the very beginning. Oh and Felix's appearance is inspired by the MAMA awards makeup (HE WAS SLAYING!! XD)
> 
> Anyway, I hope you enjoy it!

Today was going to be a perfect day, Chan decided as he flung himself out of bed in the early hours of the morning. He wasn’t sleeping before the alarm went off, not _really_ ; there was no drowsiness to shake off with the uncontainable amount of excitement thrumming through literally every cell in his body. He thinks that if people could really spontaneously combust, it would happen to him right now without hesitation. A grin was alit on his cheeks as soon as the familiar alarm ringtone had rung through his all too quiet apartment (or maybe he was smiling in his half dream half reality state that made up most of his insomniac-controlled nights) and it stayed there as he took the quickest shower of his life, it stayed there as he slipped on his usual black hoodie and jeans, it stayed there as he threw his two things of luggage into the back of his friend’s jeep and hopped into the passenger side. 

Changbin started the car and threw an amused glance as Chan practically vibrated in his seat. 

“Somebody’s excited,” the man commented with a fond eye roll as he pulled out of the parking lot. 

A giddy chuckle escaped Chan’s lips before he bubbles, “Of course. It’s been so long since I’ve gone back home, you know? I can’t wait: the people, the weather, the culture, the food, and the beach! Gosh, the beach! My pops talked about a new glass-bottom boat rental you can get in Sydney Harbor; have you ever been in one of those? I called and made reservations for it tomorrow; I’m going to go to that little island about twenty miles off the coast, there are supposed to be some rare species of fish that have adapted to the bleached coral dominating the Great Barrier Reef over there. Oh, and the kelp forest, have you ever seen a kelp forest? They are so beautiful and the ecosystems are just magnificent and majestic and- and-”

“Hyung, breathe,” Changbin laughs, shaking his head and unable to even remember all the questions the elder was spitting at him in his eager rambling.

“Right, right… Uh, sorry, Binnie; it’s just been a while since I’ve had a vacation,” Chan giggled awkwardly, his ears flushing a deep pink as he tried to melt into his hoodie.

“No, Hyung, I get it; you deserve this vacation more than anyone I know. You work so hard; I’m glad I get to see you this eager to relax. It’s refreshing,” Changbin assures as he turns onto the freeway leading to the airport. “It’s a ten-hour flight, maybe you could get some much-needed sleep on it?”

Chan frowns in slight embarrassment, “What makes you think I didn’t sleep last night?”

The younger’s brows rose incredulously, “Are you really going to try to deny it?”

He sunk further into the hoodie, grumbling, “No…”

Changbin smiled smugly, flicking on the radio, “Good. Now tell me more about these erm… rare fish.”

* * *

“Promise you’ll text us when you land.”

“Yes, yes.”

“And no working or even talking about work; ONLY relaxing.”

“Yes, okay, I get it-”

“And don’t forget to-”

“Binnie, I promise to keep you updated, yeah? Tell Sungie and Minho I’ll call them when I get to the beach house and Innie that I’ll send lots of pictures of the fishes. Now let me go, I need to board,” Chan says in faux exasperation, chocolate eyes soft with fondness and cheeks beginning to ache with the extent of his grin. 

“Yup, you got it, Hyung. Enjoy your trip!”

Chan knew he would but he never thought that the reason for his unforgettable trip would come in the form of a near-death encounter with the most majestic fish of them all.

* * *

The flight got awfully boring and he was only four hours in. He resorted to reading every single magazine in the backs of the seats but after five editions of Vogue and Fashion Weekly, he decided to plug in his headphones and tune into the news playing on the little screen at the back of the headrest belonging to the person sitting in front of him. 

He flipped through the different stations with a disinterested stare before a familiar Australian twang pinged his ears and he hovered over the news reporter’s story a little longer to read the headline.

_“New Mystery Creature on the Top of the Food Chain?”_

Chan’s brow furrowed, listening intently as he saw the photos of washed-up fish carcasses on the beach and a video of a cage diver filming passing by great whites before they all swam off in an instant.

_“One diver accounts that he had never seen so little sharks off the coast of Sydney this time of year. Normally after chumming the waters, smaller species crowd the cage until the presence of the larger great whites is detected and makes them swim away. This time, a presence appeared that scared away even the biggest of the great whites. What could it be? Scientists are speculating that it was perhaps-”_

Chan sighed, rolling his eyes as he switched to the next channel. The things people say to get on the news, he thought with a groan. 

* * *

A dopey grin is on Chan’s face as he adjusts the course of the boat, heading towards his destination with the smell of saltwater tickling his nose and squawking of gulls assailing his ears. It was lovely the way the warm and humid Australian air whipped his face and made his eyes turn into crescents as he squinted at the bright blue sky. 

The island was quickly coming into view as the man noticed another ship already anchored by the rocky shoal; perhaps they were seeing the fish too? It looked a lot more expensive and the people bustling about onboard seemed to be doing some kind of research with all the expensive-looking equipment they were carrying. Well if they were here, then he was sure to see something interesting!

A heart-gripping excitement consumed Chan as he dropped the anchor about a mile west of their boat, snatching his camera from the counter as he scrambled down the steps to the glass bottom to witness what he has been waiting nearly a year for. 

He slides down into a sitting position, face pressed against the glass like a small child at an aquarium, watching with peeked fascination as the schools of assorted fish darted to and fro. There was a significant amount of the paler phenotype among the bleached coral, but then there were a few species with a reddish hue to their fins and scales, most likely from the odd crimson lava rock dotting the seafloor. 

“Oh! Camera!” Chan scolded himself, fiddling with the device to turn off the flash before beginning to snap picture after picture. 

As he followed a certain species with a fiery stripe on its belly, a chill passed down his spine. 

The man shuddered, suddenly feeling a strange fuzziness flood his mind; he felt compelled to lift his gaze like someone was whispering soft coaxing in his ear.

So he did. The camera slowly panned upwards until a new sight other than small reef fish filled his lens. There were divers, four of them to be exact, swimming in a tight circle around a net they were hauling. Chan zooms in, eyes narrowing to get a better look at what exactly is _it_ that they are carrying. There’s a flash of red as one of the divers swerves slightly in the water and a quick gasp breaks through the man’s silence. 

A tail, the color of blood and larger than that of any fish he has ever seen, is coiled like a serpent, glittering as light bounces off the scales and fins floating in the current like they weighed nothing despite belonging to such a large creature. The two pink-hued fins on either side of the magnificent tail were in tatters, making Chan frown. He was sure that they were wide and flowy in the water, he was sure that the fish had to have gone through a struggle to get such a wound. Now that he really considers it, there was some red sluggishly mingling with the crystal clear blue of the sea; did the divers hurt whatever it is that they caught? Is that _how_ they caught it? 

Although Chan could understand that people enjoy spearfishing and all, he doesn’t understand how anyone could harm such a unique and otherworldly creature. He thought of himself as pretty educated in aquatic life forms (once upon a time, he wanted to be a marine biologist), but he had never seen a species such as this. Surely it was one of a kind, the _first_ discovered of its kind; to his own horror, he wonders if they _killed_ it. 

That odd persuasion to stare at it relents the further away from his boat they swim and there is a nauseous twist to his stomach as he considers what he just witnessed. He was probably not supposed to see them, not supposed to be at this reef and see that _fish_ (can he even call that thing a fish?) and he most certainly wasn’t supposed to take _pictures_ of them and the injured (or dead) creature they were carrying. It had just subconsciously happened; he had just tapped the capture button on his finger out of the habit of holding it in such a way and seeing an oddity. He certainly wasn’t trying to cause trouble, he certainly wasn’t going to have any problems on his vacation. 

He was merely at the wrong place at the wrong time: that sort of thing. 

And although he knew it would be best to go straight to the beach house and pretend like he saw nothing, he can’t just _sit_ here if that animal is suffering. The small child who gushed about the ocean and all the life within it, the teen that pampered his dog with endless affection and attention whenever Berry wasn’t feeling good, and the young man who rented a glass-bottom boat just so he could observe some new species of fish wasn’t going to be able to just sit here and _watch_. 

As he peers at their retreating forms, he can’t help but imagine all the horrible things he could find on the boat but the desire to sneak on to take a peek at what they’ve discovered grows even stronger: he sees himself letting whatever it is free, he sees himself succeeding despite how idiotic of a plan it is. 

He really, really wants to now. He _is really frickin curious._ His entire mind is consumed by the idea. He breathes the desire, he hears it, he sees it; God, he feels like he’s going a little crazy over it. 

* * *

It’s late at night when the ship docks at the pier on the island. 

“This is stupid, stupid, so very stupid,” Chan is muttering to himself as he drops anchor on the other side of the landform, grabbing his backpack and shoving in his camera, phone, and water bottle. “I was supposed to return the boat already and I’m going to be fined and then I’m going to get on this ship and get in trouble and probably arrested for like trespassing or something. Oh my god, what am I even doing? This is probably the most reckless, idiotic, and- and… exciting thing I have ever done. Oh, flashlight! I need a flashlight! It’s going to be dark and I have to walk around the island first; wait, my phone, my phone has a flashlight. A nice and relaxing vacation they said; ha! Since when can I ever relax? God, I’m even talking to myself now- Christopher Bang, get it together. You can handle this, you just need to chill out! Ya, chill! You can handle the crazy people in the entertainment business all the way in bustling Korea, you can handle some nerds on a boat!"

He smacks his cheeks a few times before releasing a heavy exhale. "Cool as a cucumber," he nervously giggled before hopping down the steps and landing in the white sand with a soft thump. 

He wandered along the shoreline, hands gripping the straps of his backpack tightly and hoping that the moonlight will be bright enough to prevent him from accidentally tripping over a rock and falling into the warm oceanic tides. Even if the air was sticky and heated, he still didn't want to be damp and dripping as he sneaks into unknown territory; how embarrassing would that be? 

As he sees the familiar mass floating at the wooden pier, a thought struck him: what does he do once he actually gets on the boat? Sure, it was like three in the morning and nobody in their right mind would be awake, but he doesn’t even know where the fish would be. What if they harvested something from it and then threw back in? What if it’s dead and sitting in some bin for further dissection in the morning? What if he and his giant ass feet wake up everyone on board as he scrambles from cabin to cabin in a frantic search for their most certainly illegal research specimen (you can’t just capture and harm an extremely rare and newly discovered species! That has to be breaking at least one law if not many!)?

That feeling, that fuzzy brain feeling, rears its head again and suddenly Chan forgets his worries; he wants to help this thing and he _wants_ to find it on this boat and he is _not_ leaving until he does.

The man climbs the ladder and quietly lowers himself on board, not even sure where to start but there is that gentle coaxing in his ear telling him to go to the bottom of the ship. He finds it funny for a split second, thinking of the old naval ships throwing pirates into their brig at the bottom of the ship but then he swallows roughly at the idea of going down there where members of the crew may be sleeping. 

He shakes off the worry quickly, though (he tends to get stuck in his head for a long time if he starts freaking out about every little detail). _You can handle it. Just get it over with so you can leave and pretend like nothing ever happened,_ he tells himself as he takes a deep breath and heads towards the door leading to the interior of the cabin.

He pulls it open silently, peeking only his head inside and listening for any sounds of movement; when nothing but the waves of the sea crashing against the side of the boat is heard, he enters. The hallway is a sterile white inside, doors on either side all the way down to what Chan can only assume is the captain’s quarters by the wooden carvings swirling around the top of the door. 

He feels a pull down the hallway and then to the right about halfway; his eyes widen as he opens the door to a staircase leading down into the boat. As soon as he tiptoes down the first few steps, that suffocating desire grew even stronger: his limbs felt tingly with anticipation and his gut churned with butterflies. He has to be getting closer, right? Why else would his body be reacting this way? It’s honestly a bit of a scary thought that he isn’t even sure what he is doing here in the first place or why going this direction just feels so right but he presses forward all the same. 

At the bottom of the staircase, he sees another door: this one appeared to be made out of a more sturdy material, slight rust apparent on the iron handle and obviously going to be a lot harder to open quietly. He can imagine the squeaky hinge now and sucks in his bottom lip as he pushes it open with an anxious wince. Surprisingly, it did not make a sound and Chan released the breath he didn’t know he was holding.

It was odd when he entered the room with the questions swimming through his mind: why was this door so different from the others? Why was it so much older and industrialized compared to the new and science-y appearance of the rest of the ship? What was the purpose of this room? Was it to keep others out or… something in? 

There’s a thunk sound farther into the room, sounding almost like water sloshing in a tank with each gentle rock of the ship. Since it was pitch black and soundless aside from the tank sounds, Chan carefully shrugged off his bag and felt around for his phone.

There is a pale glow that pierces through the darkness as the screen lights up and the man inhales sharply before swiping down and clicking the flashlight icon. His bag illuminates instantly and Chan lifts the device to scan his surroundings. 

The room was more bare than he thought it would be, spotting a table covered in different papers off to the right and a map on the wall above it. He approached the diagrams of fins and teeth and… webbed fingers? His brow furrowed in slight confusion before examining the map, seeing X’s placed over certain areas along the east coast of Australia (as well as one upon this very island) before wrapping around New Zealand and under the southern tip of Africa, all the way to the Gulf of Mexico. Were they tracking something? The placement of the spots didn’t seem clustered like a list of sightings, more like a migration pattern. Now that he thinks about it, it almost looked like the migration pattern of a Great White; of course, though, there weren't any signs indicating the time of the year for each X so he couldn’t be sure. 

His phone panned along the wall before he caught the reflection of his light shining back at him. He puts the diagram he was holding down before turning towards what he could only assume was a massive fish tank.

He moved towards it like it was beckoning him with glowing neon lights, the flashlight of his phone revealing nothing but ominous water as he scanned across the tank.

Then, in the far corner, red. He sees a flash of crimson and Chan immediately rushes towards the glass to get a better look. The light illuminates upon a massive blood-colored tail with glittering scales and tattered pinkish fins and- Chan freezes, his eyes going as wide as saucers as he sees _what_ this _tail_ has been coiled around. 

Tan skin, tan skin and platinum blonde hair is the first to catch his eye; lean arms with pink fins just below the elbow and freckled shoulders are resting upon the coil, hands resembling close to a human’s clasped at the sides to reveal wicked claws and pink-webbed fingers. Light-colored hair that appeared so healthy and shiny that it flowed through the water like silk framed the creature’s face and two red fins pressed against their temples where a human’s ears should be. But the face, _their face,_ was what left Chan completely speechless: a button nose and full, dark eyelashes resting upon pale freckled cheeks, and the sharpest jawline he has ever seen. A few red scales dotted along their cheekbones and plump cupid-bow lips were parted from what appears to be a… gag? The man peers a little closer, forehead pressed completely against the tank now as he notices the creature’s wrists tied together by an old rope and an odd kink at the end of its flicking tail- wait… flicking tail? Chan’s gaze quickly darts up to the face, now seeing ice-blue, cat-like eyes staring back at him with an intensity that could only resemble a prey’s face-to-face confrontation with a mighty predator. 

He squeaks, scrambling backwards in surprise and landing roughly on his backside. The creature slowly uncoils, rising up in the water to demonstrate all of its magnificent glory; Chan feels breathless with its ethereal yet daunting appearance, not sure if his heart was beating out of his chest because of fear or embarrassment or perhaps even arousal- No, no, he must banish those thoughts immediately even if this being is definitely more beautiful than any living thing Chan has ever come across, even if their impossibly thin waist and sculpted golden abs were so incredibly a turn on that his knees would probably go weak if he wasn’t already sitting on his ass. Hell, he’d drop down on his knees in a heartbeat if this water angel asked him to and had something to suc- 

The creature’s nose wrinkles slightly at him, pupils resembling slits as they watched his every move with an intimidating caution. Chan’s ears flush a deep red as he quickly closes his legs and sits up to hug his knees. He feels his curiosity return slowly, eyes blinking up at them as the bewitched haze fogging his mind relented some and he could feel words returning to him as the initial shock-factor faded.

“W-What are you?” Chan croaks, grimacing at his voice’s betrayal before looking at the creature in fascination. 

Their eyes narrow, tail swishing in the water in an almost aggressive manner. Their bound hands raise and fall as they coil around again on the tank floor, significantly closer to the glass this time. 

“A mermaid, right? Or- Or maybe you prefer the title of siren… Wait or are you like a merman- or I mean I shouldn’t assume your gender- Um- Um, mer, you’re a mer either way, huh? Geez, I’m sorry, this is awkward.”

They just stare, an almost translucent second eyelid vertically crossing their irises and the fins on the side of their head twitching subtly. 

After a moment, something dawns on Chan as a possibility (after all, just because Ariel understood English doesn’t mean that all mer do), “Do you know what I'm saying?”

The mer continues to look at him distrustfully but tilts its head slightly, Adam's apple vibrating shortly in their throat as one would do in a hum of conformation. 

Chan’s expression immediately lights up (even if it could have totally been a growl of some sort telling him to fuck off but oh well, he’ll give them the benefit of the doubt). “So you are a mer, do you speak? Like- do you speak English or do mers have their own language or um..?”

Their nostrils flare and face-fins tilt backward, reminding Chan of the ears of a cat with how expressive they are. But that makes him quickly become apprehensive because if their behavior truly is a sign of displeasement, then Chan could have just offended one of the most dangerous creatures in the entire ocean and should really be fearing for his life at the moment. The creature seemed to sense the reason behind the man’s sudden fall of expression, audibly clicking their jaw a few times to demonstrate the gag’s obstruction.

“Oh,” Chan’s face turns sheepish, the flush on his ears and neck traveling up to his cheeks, “Yeah, of course you can’t speak: you’re wearing a gag. I-I feel silly now…”

There’s another strange humming motion but the eyes stayed narrowed and the tip of their tail was flicking back and forth restlessly like they were losing their patience. The mer’s irises swirl suddenly, an otherworldly sight of a stormy gray intermingling with the icy blue and completely leaving Chan mesmerized; but then, there’s a rush of emotions shooting through the man that makes that all-consuming desire return. His head goes fuzzy and breathing quickens.

“I want to free you,” Chan murmurs, mostly to himself before realization slaps him in the face; looking up at the mer, he exclaims, “Oh! I was here to free you!”

The stormy color fades and the gaze the man receives seems almost smug. The mer straightens their back, temporal fins snapping forward in a listening manner.

Chan jumps up to his feet, “So, I was thinking, I could take the lid off and help pull you out and then carry you up the stairs and out of the cabin and um… throw you back into the ocean?”

They completely uncoil again, body fully extended and intimidating as they tower over Chan’s form for the second time in the past ten minutes. But they bend at the torso, bringing their face to be eye-level with Chan and their nose only centimeters away from touching the glass.

He gulps, averting his gaze with the nerves gripping his stomach before looking at their face to question, “Y-You do want to be freed, right?”

Another flare of nostrils, slitted pupils examining every inch of Chan’s face as he squirms in place under the scrutiny.

He wants to help them, he wants to help them so _bad_. Nothing so beautiful should be an experiment; nothing so beautiful should be shown to the world just for that same world to destroy it. This creature was forcibly taken from their home and had sustained several injuries before being thrown in literally a bare, oversized fish tank. But on the other hand, Chan was kind of terrified that they were going to eat him with the way their eyes were staring at him so skeptically and maliciously. Would they kill him as soon as he took the lid off? Or would they let him carry them to the ocean before yanking him into the depths of the sea to finish him off? 

Chan shivers. That surely is _the_ way to go: being dragged to the bottom of the ocean by a gorgeous siren after freeing it from its captors first (as gruesome as it sounds, he wouldn’t be content with dying any other way). 

The slits fill out a bit, not quite dilated but enough to resemble more than merely a black crack in a diamond. The mer raises their clawed hands, pressing one particularly long nail to the glass and scratching in a circular motion as a sharp shrieking sound rings from the tank. Chan clamps his hands tightly over his ears as the unpleasurable noise continues as they do with their carving. When they finally lower their hands, the side of the tank reads in wobbly letters _‘OUT.’_

A nervous giggle erupts from the back of Chan’s throat as the mer stares at him eagerly. “Yeah, out; I can let you out, sure. But um- you gotta like- promise me something first, yeah?”

They didn’t seem to like this answer, fins pinning to the side of their head as their tail whipped into the word on the tank with a threatening thump. Slits again.

Chan swallows, hands waving through the air frantically as he was quick to assure, “Hey, I’ll let you out; I will, okay? I just… I need to know that you’re not gonna kill me as soon as you’re out of the tank? Can you promise me that? That you won’t eat me or attack me or anything? Just let me help you out and then we can both be on our merry ways, yeah?”

The temporal fins flick forward hesitantly, eyes narrowed in suspicion. 

“I know these people treated you badly, they hurt you; but I’m not like that, okay? You have my word. A-All I want to do is help you.”

They leaned back a bit, slits widening slightly again. Chan took that as a good sign, following up with, ”So do we have a deal?”

There’s a small whistling sound and it takes the man a moment to realize that it was the mer who made it, seeing their throat vibrating again. Chan has no idea how or why they made it but a timid smile quirks his lips. “This is a lot harder when you can’t speak, huh? How about… two blinks for ‘yes’, one blink for ‘I’m going to drag you to the bottom of the sea’.”

The mer tilted their head, a pinch to their brow. 

“Like this,” Chan said, blinking his eyes in a very dramatized manner for demonstration, “Now you do it so I know for sure what your answer is.”

They come closer to the glass, nose actually pressed to it now as they blink their first set of eyelids once; Chan’s face pales but then an odd trill cuts through the air as the creature blinks a second time and then a third and then a fourth. The relief is not as strong as it should be; to be honest, he’s not really sure if they were mocking him or just truly didn’t understand the concept (or perhaps they just didn’t care about promising a measly human such as himself something that they wouldn’t be hesitant to do if the situation so calls for it; which, Chan supposes, was understandable but it still made his hands sweat with the possibility of his first vacation quickly becoming his _last_ ). 

“Okay, mer,” Chan reluctantly says, lifting a hand towards one of the clasps on the lid, “I’m going to trust you just- please- don’t make me regret this.”

They didn’t seem to be listening, already hovering near the surface of the water with a jittery swishing of their injured tail.

“Oh and you have to be quiet; you wouldn’t want to wake up the crew, would you?”

They pause, temporal fins and nose twitching before they stare back at the lid.

Chan sighs. _I can’t believe I’m doing this. You’re a crazy man, Christopher Bang. This is going to be how you die: watch._

He unclasps the other side and the mer bursts from the water, tied hands quickly pushing open the lid before hanging half of their torso out of the tank, consequently dripping water down upon the floor and Chan. The man frowns down at his attire, so much for not getting his clothes wet _. It was a stupid game plan, anyway._

They hold out their clawed hands towards him and Chan just looks at them dumbly. “Y-You want me to untie you?” The mer huffs. The man looks up, apprehensive now that he can see up close how sharp and powerful the nails are. “No clawing me, right? No ripping out my throat?” 

The mer gave two overexaggerated blinks in response and Chan relaxes ever so slightly at the silliness of the gesture. He reaches up, picking at the knot until the rope comes undone and the mer quickly shakes it off their wrists. 

“Gag too?” Chan asks, reaching for their face but the mer quickly pulls back, ripping the cloth from their mouth with webbed fingers.

“No touching,” they grumble out and dear lord it was uttered as a threat but the deep, husky Australian-accented sound of their voice goes straight to Chan’s head and makes him experience butterflies all over. 

He feels like being a little bratty just to hear the mer speak again, asking innocently, “How am I supposed to help you if I can’t touch you? Unless all you needed from me was to open the tank…”

Their nostrils exhale harshly, droplets of water spraying out as they narrow their eyes again (no slits yet, luckily). “Only when I say so,” the mer growls, hauling themselves further out of the water with the sheer strength of their arms (Chan shivers at their might). “Come closer, human.”

The man’s eyes widened curiously, taking a step towards the tank before the mer lowered their upper torso over the side until Chan could see nothing but their icy blue eyes and shark-like teeth inches from his face. They mumble, “When I touch you, don’t pull away.”

“What-” he didn’t get a chance to finish before a pair of pink, plump lips cut him off.

Every instinct in the man’s body told him that this was so hilariously wrong and that he should push the mer away from his mouth but on the other hand, the kiss was so intoxicating and their lips molded to his so perfectly that Chan couldn’t help but hesitantly kiss back. He opened his eyes when his entire being began to tingle, looking at the mer’s body to see it slowly morphing. The scales and fins on their face slowly disappeared into the rest of their freckled tan skin, gills on the sides of their abdomen thinning until nothing more than subtle slits in the skin, claws shrinking and webbing folding down into regular human flesh, fins on their arms pressing down against the skin until they were practically absorbed and a large crimson tail transforming into two fit legs. 

Chan’s so shocked and breathless that he feels his body waver before the mer roughly pushes him away and swings down from the ledge of the tank with masterful grace.

They wince as they land, an ankle clearly bruised and swollen while gashes run up the sides of their feet but Chan can only blink in a flustered manner at the fact that this _mer_ is now very much a hot naked man right in front of him. He yelps as his gaze travels to all the places it most certainly _shouldn’t_ before he covers his eyes with a hand and snaps indignantly, “Is this really necessary? You could have at least given me a warning or something!”

Simply, they reply, “I see no problem.”

“You just kissed me without even asking and now you are suddenly a human! And you are _not wearing anything_!” He hates the whine in his voice at the last part.

“Do _not_ call me _human_ ,” they hiss in disgust, limping over to the map and papers to snatch them all up and throw them right into the tank, “And if appearance bothers your pathetic eyes, then don’t look at me.”

“Pathetic?” Chan squeaks, “Why are my eyes pathetic?”

There’s a scoff from the mer as they throw their head back, another trill vibrating in their throat. “Too expressive; all humans show everything through their eyes.”

“What? What do you mean by that-”

They whip around to face him, piercing blue staring directly into his soul. “I see everything,” they mutter, an upward quirk to their lips in what Chan assumes is their equivalent to a toothy smirk, "All humans have the same primitive desires and are not good at hiding them. Even you, sailor: I knew what you wanted even before your lower extremities betrayed you."

Chan's mouth opens and closes uselessly, his entire face redder than a beet. He can't even look the mer in the eyes with their molded-by-gods body on full display; he pulls off his hoodie and holds it out to them.

"What is that?"

"Wear it; i-it'll cover you up."

There's another amused trill that echoes through the room and Chan shrinks in on himself in even further embarrassment before the mer snatches the hoodie from his hands. 

"How do I wear it?" They ask, inspecting the fabric with distaste before looking over the clothing Chan was wearing. 

The man stares at the ceiling modestly, saying, "Slide it over your head. Stick your arms through the two holes on the sides-"

There's a forceful chuff of air before the mer questions, "Why?"

Chan's brow furrows in confusion, "Because that's how you wear it?"

"And why must I wear it? I don't want to wear _it_."

"Because it m-might get cold outside when you're wet a-and like… like _that_."

It is silent too long for Chan's liking, taking a risk to hesitantly look down at the mer's face. "Do you- Do you need help?" he asked, fingers brushing the hoodie before the mer let out a low growl in warning. Chan put both hands up in surrender, taking a step back to put some space between them and show that he meant no harm. “Sorry; no touching, r-right…”

The mer watched him suspiciously but their pupils gradually widened back to a more human-like size, keeping heavy eye contact as they slipped the hoodie over their head and pulled it down to rest at about mid-thigh. Chan had expected it to be big, but the mer was completely _swimming_ in his hoodie; if it wasn’t for the shark fangs and monstrous claws, he might have dared say that they looked kind of _endearing_ like that.

They were covered but not nearly covered enough because he could feel his heart beating a little faster even as they continued to stare at him like he was the very last tim tam in a fifty-mile radius. 

“Adequate?” They asked, expression completely serious despite the cheekiness in the tone of the question.

Chan can’t stop the blush rising on his cheeks once again as he realizes that he was caught staring. “Y-Yes! I mean- uh- yeah, sure.”

The mer clicks their tongue, turning towards the iron door with a grumble of, “The infatuation will fade with time; your body will get used to the _lure_.”

“L-Lure? I don’t understand-”

“Quiet, sailor; if the crew awakens, I will kill you in front of them.”

“Wait what?! Why not just kill them-”

The mer makes an odd sound, something that has to be a cross between a scoff and an amused snort. “You shall serve as a demonstration,” they mutter smugly and Chan can feel his face blanch but he wisely shuts his mouth and follows them up the cabinet stairs (even if they were going very slowly with the slight limp of their injured ankle. He would offer to carry the mer or to at least offer a shoulder for support, but he had a pretty good idea of what the reply would be).

The pair makes it to the deck of the ship without trouble, the mer taking their time to stretch their arms high above their head until their back popped (and only giving Chan a small heart attack as he was reminded that there was nothing on beneath the hoodie when he caught a full sight of a firm yet supple ass that was much too perfect to belong to just an ordinary person). 

Chan climbs down the ladder hastily, glad to be finally off the boat and done with this night's adventure, but he hears another figure plop down next to him with a hiss. 

He turns to see the mer baring their teeth at their swollen ankle, clearly in pain from the careless activities they have been putting it through.

“Why didn’t you just jump into the water?” Chan asks before he can even consider the question, flinching subtly as the mer looks up with searching eyes. 

“If I did, I’d transform back,” they replied plainly, pupils dilating some in adjustment to the moonlight. Their nose twitches in slight annoyance as Chan still appears confused. “Your boat, sailor, will be easier to board without a tail. Unless you want me to kiss you again?”

It dawns on the man all at once, eyes widening as he stutters out, “Wait you’re coming with me?!” 

“Yes,” the mer says, face mostly blank despite the obvious distaste in the thin press of their lips, “You gave me your word that you wouldn’t harm me, human: throwing me back into the ocean in my injured state will most certainly be my demise. If not from others of your kind, the sharks instead.”

“B-But the boat isn’t mine! And I’m not a sailor!”

“Then take me to your dwellings unless you no longer _want_ to help me; if so, I will gladly take back my part of the deal as well.”

“No, no, no,” Chan quickly assured with a panicky shake of his head, “I’ll help, I’ll take you back to my beach house; no reason to kill me, don’t be hasty, see? I’m still willing to help, just… surprised is all.”

The aggressive slit to the mer’s eyes relented some, their claws shrinking back to the size possessed by their human form before they gave a grunt. “Good. I give you my word that I will not harm you, human; but I must warn you, betraying a siren is not a pleasant sight no matter the species. We are mainly solitary creatures so trust does not come easy; betray your word and I will feast on your heart, understood?”

Chan gulped in fear, very aware of the organ’s pounding in his ears before giving a quick nod. “U-Understood.”

The mer hums, turning around to begin their trek down the beach to where Chan’s boat was docked. 

He bit his bottom lip as he watched them practically drag their right leg behind them, the limp becoming worse and the wounds on the bottoms of their feet leaving a sluggish trail of blood on the light-colored sand. 

“Are you going to be able to make it to the boat? Your feet are looking pretty tore up…” he commented in worry, hands twitching with the desire to carry the slender siren before they hurt themselves further.

“Such injuries are none of your concern,” the mer snapped, refusing to look back at him (and honestly not having to to know that the man was pouting), “They are insignificant and will not keep me from getting off this putrid island and as far away from those heathens as possible.”

“But you’re bleeding-”

“I know,” they hiss, stopping to look back with swirling irises, “I don’t need a reminder, sailor. I don’t care how much you _want to help_ out of sheer _pity for me._ Let me remind you that I do not _need_ your assistance, I am choosing to accept it: _very different._ ”

Chan sighs heavily, “For the last time, I’m not a _sailor_.”

“Then what are you?”

“I’m just- just a music producer here on vacation for the summer.”

Their eyes narrow as they just peer at him for a few moments before they release a displeased cross between a scoff and a hum. “You are a human, no? I shall call you human; that title is too long.”

“Or you can just call me by my name-”

“I do not wish to be given your name-”

“It’s Christopher-”

“I did not ask for-”

“-but you can call me Chan.” The man smiles, a nervous twinkle to their eyes but otherwise a little exasperated with the mer’s dismissive and cold behavior.

They actually growl in irritation, a deep and guttural sound coming from the back of their throat as they glare at him. “You should not give your name out so easily, human,” they grumble despite the slight look of defeat in their eyes and Chan takes it as a win nonetheless.

“Why not?” he asks, tilting his head in faux innocence as the mer releases yet another growl much louder this time.

“Because others may use it against you-”

“Well then just give me your name so we can be even,” Chan suggests impishly, his smile growing even wider as the mer seemed to consider it for a moment.

“I do not wish to be familiar with you... but if this will satisfy your pestering enough to not question my every motive…”

“Yes, I promise I’ll trust you better if I know your name,” Chan replies almost immediately in his eagerness as soon as he saw the mer’s expression waver into one of relent.

“You make promises too easily, too…” They point out with a slightly disgusted frown which makes the man snort. 

He raises his eyebrows expectantly as they look away from him. 

The mer blinks at the ocean, face emotionless. “Felix.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Felix,” Chan says with a warm grin, holding out his hand.

Felix stares at it before narrowing his eyes in an inquisitive manner. “Why?” he questions slowly.

“Oh! Um, it’s like- just an expression used when you meet somebody for the first time…”

The mer is still frowning despite the explanation. “And your hand? What do you want?”

Chan immediately pulls his hand back in slight humiliation, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly. “That? Well, I was going to shake your- you know what? Never mind. Uh, we should probably just head back to the boat, yeah?”

“Yes, that would seem best,” Felix agrees, turning back around and walking on without waiting to see if Chan was following first.

The man sighs and curses himself for being an awkward idiot. If Changbin or Jisung or even Minho was here, he knows that he would never hear the end of it...


	2. Bewitched By the Blue Moons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Their skin practically glowed against the night sky, freckles making the stars jealous and eyes a brighter blue than the moon could ever be. 
> 
> "It wasn't my intention to offend you earlier; humans just- they wear clothes around each other," he says softly, swallowing as Felix casts him a sideways glance.
> 
> "If I was offended, we would not be speaking."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiya! We're getting into some more character development here and bonding moments (yay!) as well as some slight angst and building off of siren Felix's abilities  
> Thanks for the nice comments, here's the next chappy:) I hope you enjoy

“W-What are you doing?!” Chan practically shrieked as he froze on the spot upon entering his beach home (he had just spent the last thirty minutes trying to talk the security guard into letting him just dock the rental and pay the fine in the morning when there are people in the office but the man had insisted that he couldn’t just _park a ship at the pier_ _without filling out some kind of log or being given a designated space._ It also didn’t help that Chan wasn’t able to tell the security guard _why_ he returned so late; but, fortunately, one look at Felix had the man drooling and nodding his head like a lovesick puppy). He had opened the door and was greeted by the sight of a bare back as his guest slipped off the hoodie they were previously wearing.

“I am removing these constricting garments,” Felix stated like it was the most obvious thing on the planet, looking over their shoulder with a bored expression. 

The man’s ears flush, covering his eyes with his hands as he indignantly cried, “B-But- you- you can’t just walk around my house naked! You need to keep that on!” 

A rumbling noise emanates from the mer’s throat. “I see no need to. In your dwelling, I am hidden from the feeble eyes-”

“Not mine!” Chan whines, “I still have to look at you!”

Silence follows. Chan takes a moment to peek through his fingers and sees the siren staring at him with an unreadable gaze. 

“Do you not wish to see me?” Felix asks finally, expression blank but ice-blue irises swirling intensely. 

Immediately, Chan replies, “Yes,” but rethinks his words as the mer’s gaze darkens into a stormy gray and their ears twitch in anger, “Wait- I didn’t mean like you in general; I just meant you… as you are now-”

They frown, their grip tightening on the hoodie in their hands. “I see, I am unfit for even your eyes; bring me something more suitable to present myself in then, human.”

“Um, yeah, sure,” Chan mumbles, feeling guilty by his poor choice of words but not sure what Felix’s reaction meant so he thought it’d be best to just comply with their demand, “Just let me go find some clothes that will fit you…”

* * *

It’s awkward as Chan finds Felix some time later sitting crisscrossed on the balcony, fully dressed in the white t-shirt and sweats he had given them (he had returned to the living room with the clothing but didn’t see the mer. It wasn’t until he heard the sink running that he realized Felix was hiding in the bathroom. He knocked on the door courteously but received no reply other than the room going silent. _“I’ll just leave these for you here outside the door, okay? If you need something, let me know.”_ He then went to make some late night ramen in the kitchen, unaware of the figure quickly dressing themselves and slipping out the slider door). 

“So this is where you wandered off to; I thought for a second that you had fallen in,” Chan attempted to joke before cringing at his words as Felix’s brow furrowed slightly in confusion; their eyes didn't leave the ocean even as Chan sat down a couple of feet away from them. 

“Fall in where?”

The man sighs, shaking his head, “Nowhere; sorry, it’s just an expression.” The mer doesn’t reply and Chan finds himself admiring the side of their face under the pale light of the moon. Their skin practically glowed against the night sky, freckles making the stars jealous and eyes a brighter blue than the moon could ever be. 

"It wasn't my intention to offend you earlier; humans just- they wear clothes around each other," he says softly, swallowing as Felix casts him a sideways glance.

"If I was offended, we would not be speaking."

Chan nods, looking down at their feet. "You should come inside so I can treat your wounds."

The mer scoffs. "You will do nothing of the sort. I do not wish for your clumsy human hands to touch me."

He frowns at them, now being the one who was offended. "Are you this mean to everybody that tries to help you?" Chan questions dryly, annoyed that Felix wouldn't even look him in the eye as they were talking. 

“Mean?” The mer seemed genuinely surprised, turning to Chan and leaning forward on their hands to put only a foot between their faces, “You think I am mean?”

Chan nibbles on his bottom lip as the full force of their intense icy stare is pressed upon him; he tries his best not to wheeze a little as he utters while feeling the faint breath of the mer upon his face, “Well, a little… if not hostile and aggressive and threatening to kill me every once in a while.”

They made a clicking noise, multiple clicking noises. Felix looked down at themselves before back to the ocean and then at Chan once again. “I am not mean,” they say firmly, “I am wary. I do not understand you.”

Chan blinks at them, caught off guard by the honesty of their response. “Me?” he asks dumbfoundedly.

The mer only hums in conformation, leaning back but not taking their eyes off him (Chan realizes that he can breathe a little easier now). 

After a few moments, Chan has regained most of his composure but still feels a smidge stupefied. “Why are you wary of me? I gave you my word that I wouldn't harm you.”

Felix’s eyes narrow but it appears to be in an inquisitive manner rather than full-blow suspicion. “That is what I don’t understand, Christopher the music director here on vacation: why are you doing this?”

He politely ignores the title. “Because I want to help you-”

“But _why_ do you want to help me?” Now the suspicion is present as they tilt their head ever so slightly, purposefully blinking their second eyelid to make sure that eye contact is maintained through the whole endeavor. Their jaw shifts at Chan’s hesitance, adding skeptically, “What are you hoping to gain?”

Chan scowls in perplexity, replying, “Gain? I’m not hoping for anything. I’m just being _a_ _good person_.”

Felix’s lip curls. “There are no _good people_. All humans are greedy and selfish, easily corruptible just by possessing the whims of man.”

He shakes his head in a tsking manner. “That’s where you are wrong, Felix. There are good people in this world, you just haven’t met them yet. I like to consider myself a good one; I like to bring out the goodness in people; I just like helping people because I hope that they’ll spread the goodness and help others. _"_ He chuckles in slight embarrassment and they stare at him like he grew a second head. "My friends say I'm too ambivalent for my own good."

"Friends? Are your friends good people?"

Chan blinks a few times at the topic switch, baffled once again by the mer’s questions. "Yeah, of course; that’s why they are my friends, my chosen family. Why would I be friends with bad people?” He giggles slightly at the thought but sees that Felix is watching him with doubt in their eyes. “Don't you have friends in the ocean?"

Something close to a dolphin whistle emanates from Felix before they are declaring earnestly, "No, I do not. Why would I have something I don't need? I can take care of myself, I do not need friends."

Chan raises a brow. "Well, sure, I guess you don't technically need friends to survive but haven't you ever wanted any? It’s so boring and lonely without them."

The mer frowns. “Why ask such a question: why does it matter what I want?” They snap defensively but sound more irked by something personal rather than anything Chan said or did, “Such human desires are pointless and far below me; I do not need friends therefore I do not want them.”

A knowing smile spreads across Chan’s lips, entirely amused by the mer’s insistence despite their prickly behavior saying otherwise. “You don’t want one or you’ve just never had one?” He inquires.

Felix doesn’t reply, nose wrinkling as they look away from Chan; their frown only deepened as they watched the tide. He wasn’t really sure what was going through the mer’s mind, but he had a feeling that they wanted a friend a lot more than they let on. Hesitance, doubt: whatever it is, Chan wants to make sure that they knew that they could always find him. He will prove to Felix that there are good people; he will prove to Felix that they can be one of the good ones too.

Chan proclaims without a second thought, “I will be your first then.”

Felix makes a strange noise in their throat, much like a startled cat. They look at him curiously.

“I will be your first friend,” he clarifies, just as determined even through Felix’s brow furrows and an annoyed growl is heard.

“I do _not_ want your companionship, huma-”

“But I want it,” he says with as much sincerity as he can muster, “That’s what I get out of this: a new friend. And if you want, you can get a friend out of it too as an added bonus.”

They open their mouth to object but Chan cuts them off with, “Now come inside so I can disinfect and wrap your feet; you are not going to get any better by being stubborn.”

The mer stares and for a moment, Chan fears that he may have overstepped his boundaries but then they are standing up with a click of their tongue.

“Do what you will, human,” Felix says with an air of vexation; although, when he truly looks into their eyes just before they turn to leave, Chan had never seen their pupils so dilated. 

* * *

  
  


It’s about eight in the morning when Chan finally hears the door to the guest bedroom open. He had been humming in the kitchen for the past thirty minutes while making eggs and toast for breakfast (he wasn’t exactly sure what sirens eat but he assumed that he might as well make something for himself with what he could find around the kitchen) and was happy to see that his unexpected house guest made it through the night in one piece.

“Good morning,” Chan chirped, smiling as he watched the mer pad into the kitchen with skewed hair and a glare on their face. 

Felix grunts unceremoniously. “What makes it good?” they question with a slightly wrinkled noise.

He stalls for a moment, “Oh um- it’s an-”

“Expression?” The mer tilts their head, annoyance clearly written on their face, “You use too many of those.”

The man chuckles awkwardly, “Yeah, you’re probably right.”

Felix scoffs, eyeing him curiously. “I am. Why would I lie?”

He shakes his head, going back to scraping his scrambled eggs. “I will be going to the pier today to pay the fine for the boat. If you want, we can go by the fish market and you could pick out what you’d like to eat-”

“No,” the mer says curtly, jaw clenched as they pick at their nails, “Any aquatic creature will suffice.”

Chan frowns, sending them a glance as he turns off the stove and begins scooping some eggs onto a plate. “You want to stay here?”

“Yes, I do not wish to be around your kind. Humans are… quite disgusting beings. I would much rather stay and wait for your return,” they say, coming closer to Chan as they study the plate from over his shoulder, “I must regain my strength quickly; eating and resting is all I will be doing.” 

The man is stiff as he feels the presence much too close behind him breathe against his neck. Goosebumps break out across his skin as he hears Felix whisper lowly, “Now, do not disturb my slumber with such insufficient humming in the early hours of the day again. You will regret it when the ocean truly begins to call me back.” They snatch the plate of eggs from him and spin around back to the guest bedroom, leaving Chan there to gulp and stare at their retreating form dumbly (it definitely didn’t help that Felix’s voice was still raspy from sleep and the oversized sweatpants he gave them were hanging low on their swaying hips. Honestly, he couldn’t even be sad about the eggs). 

* * *

“Yeah, once again, I’m very sorry about yesterday. I truly did fall asleep on the boat trip and completely lost track of time,” Chan explains bashfully, a hand rubbing the back of his neck as the tips of his ears flushed a deep red at the blatant lie. 

The lady at the corner just grunted in affirmation, her eyes narrowed in unamusement. 

“Uh, have a wonderful rest of your day, ma’am.” He smiled awkwardly and took his leave, figuring the woman wouldn’t have replied even if he was standing right in front of her waiting for one. 

The fish market was a decent amount of chaotic at this time of day, the best picks already snatched up in the wee hours of the morning but still a wide selection before the afternoon rush. Chan wandered the stalls, unsure of what fish Felix would prefer as well as the quantity of seafood they needed to satisfy their hunger. Would they need about double their body weight to maintain their muscle mass and endurance much like an ocean predator? Or would they be eating less due to their temporary human form? Would being injured affect their appetite? Were some foods easier to eat as a siren rather than a human? Do the fish still have to be alive when they feed on them? How fresh do they have to be before Felix won’t eat them?

Ah, he’s overthinking again; he should have dragged Felix with him. Even if they were grumpy after being woken up by Chan’s mediocre humming ( _sorry, that he didn’t realize he had an audience and wasn’t exactly trying_ ; now that he thinks about it, does bad singing offend sirens?), they could have lightened up and gotten over it because he is buying food for them. He shouldn’t be the one struggling with the pressure of picking the wrong fish or wondering how much his wallet is going to suffer from the amount of seafood he must purchase in one sitting (that he won’t even be eating). Wait… would he have to do this every day?

With a sigh, Chan walks up to the nearest stand and says, “Good day, give me your three biggest fish please.”

“I will get right on it, mate,” the fishmonger replied.

As the man waits and shifts from foot to foot, he finds himself watching the groups of people going about their day. He has always enjoyed people watching, not because he’s creepy or lonely of course, but because he enjoys seeing the pure moments between individuals that remind him that the world isn’t so dark. The music industry is full of selfish, greedy, and shady people; it’s nice to see examples of joy and love and friendship still being alive in the world. 

“Did you hear about the ship that arrived on the pier this morning? Supposedly they are foreigners on a search for a new species here off the coast; they said it’d be the greatest discovery in centuries.”

Chan startles, glancing to his left to see two women standing at the stall one over. Subtly, he shuffles a little closer to hear their conversation better (he was _not_ being a nosy eavesdropper; he just… wants to know what the word is on Felix and the people who had captured them. How much do people know about what happened? Do people know about Felix? Are they in danger?)

“Centuries? That sounds kind of cocky, don’t you think?” the other woman commented, gaze appearing doubtful and disinterested.

“They said that it was _groundbreaking,_ extraordinary and almost unreal!”

“And did they catch _whatever it is_?” 

“They did!”

“Really?”

“Yes but then- then they said it was stolen.”

“Stolen?” the woman looked completely unconvinced now, “Who would steal a freakin fish?”

“Someone who would want the credit first, maybe?”

“That’s ridiculous. The person who _stole it_ would have shown it to the world already then. So why haven’t they?”

“I don’t know… maybe-”

“Admit it: they found nothing.”

“They said they had documentation.”

Chan tenses (proof? They had proof? This is bad, really bad. Felix would be outed the world; they’d find them and experiment on them and-)

“Oh, well then why don’t they release-”

“-But they were destroyed by whoever stole the fish.”

At this, the man relaxes, even snorts slightly. They thought Chan was smart enough to destroy the evidence of their discovery? Hilarious; he didn’t even consider the maps and diagrams and papers. They underestimated the abilities of the mer. The woman was right: they were cocky. Felix could have taken them on single handedly. In fact, Chan wouldn’t have doubted Felix being able to escape by themselves. They probably could have cut a circle in the glass and slip through; all they really needed from Chan was someone to… to kiss so they could transform into their human form (the man doesn’t like how useless that made him feel. Although, he helped untie the rope too. That has to count for something right? Oh and he also gave the mer a place to hide and now he’s buying them food and-)

“Uh, sir? Your fish; I said the total will be seventy-three fifty-six.”

Chan snaps out of his thoughts instantly, looking at the fishmonger with an embarrassed and entirely apologetic smile (his eyes may or may not have watered at the sinking feeling in his chest as the price was uttered; his wallet was probably crying too). “O-Oh yes, of course,” he mumbles, immediately pulling out his debit card and passing it over to the man as he took his bag of ginormous fish he couldn’t even give the name of. He squeaks as the weight of the bag catches his arms off guard. He inhales a deep breath and then swings it over his shoulder, silently thanking that he didn’t go to the gym today (and positive that he won’t be needing to go for a while). 

* * *

"Felix? I'm back," Chan attempted to call, significantly out of breath as he drops the bag of fish onto the floor and kicks off his shoes.

"I am well aware," came back a snippy retort as the guest room door opened. 

The man glances up to see the mer looking just as _special_ as they were earlier, their arms crossed over their chest.

"Oh uh- sorry for waking you… again?"

“I was not sleeping. Although, I do appreciate the announcing of your presence even though it was entirely unnecessary,” they say monotonously, gaze watching him with a blank expression and leaving Chan mildly confused as to whether it was sarcasm or an actual display of gratefulness. 

“Could you… sense me coming or something-” Chan stops, his brow furrowing in concern as he takes in the mer’s appearance more closely, “Hey, are you okay?”

Felix’s blonde hair was matted and stuck to their forehead, shirt sticking to their skin in several places and their legs shifting subtly beneath them as if their sweats were uncomfortable. The bandages on their feet seemed to barely be holding on and one particularly nasty gash was reopened and soaking through its band aid with ease (Chan feels dumb now for wanting them to come with him to the fish market; they looked worse than they did last night). 

Felix opens their mouth, “It’s-” they close it, face twisting with hesitance before they scowl, “It’s none of your concern.”

Chan frowns, moving closer to them out of habit from his touchy and compassionate nature. Felix’s shoulders squared, their back straightening in a cautious manner. 

“You don’t look too good: you’re all sweaty and your foot is bleeding again,” he mumbles, pouting at the mer’s distrustful gaze and defensive posture. 

“Your human eyes deceive you,” they say cryptically before tilting their head much like an all too innocent dog, “I look great under the current circumstances.”

Chan would love to agree that even while they were sweating bullets and sickly in the face (they were definitely paler than before, dark circles now accompanying the striking diamond eyes), Felix could still easily strut down a runway and leave the room speechless but he keeps that personal opinion locked down deep inside with an iron key. 

“You look like you have a fever,” Chan says softly, hand reaching towards the mer’s forehead to feel for a temperature. They lean back, hissing between clenched and barely visible fangs as their lip subtly curls (the slits of their pupils served as a quick reminder that this being was far from human). “Come now, mate, we’re friends; friends allow the other to see if they are sick, yeah?”

“I never claimed us as friends; you did that and I simply didn’t have the energy to rival your stubbornness. Besides, I’ve never had one: how should I know something as trivial as that?” Felix snaps, more teeth becoming exposed as they watch Chan’s nearing hand warily. 

“I said I wouldn’t hurt you,” the man practically coos, “There is nothing to be afraid of. If you are sick, I can give you medicine or-”

“I am _not_ afraid, I _am_ sick,” they say, irises flashing such a sudden and bright indigo that the man wouldn’t be surprised if they glowed in a dark room, “But not for the reason you think; human remedies will not help me.”

Chan’s hand stops mere centimeters from the mer’s skin, intrigued by the intense blue and the possible meaning behind their words. “Is it… Is it a siren illness?”

Their jaw audibly clicks but they visibly relax as the man (reluctantly) withdraws his limb to get a better look at their face. 

There are a few moments that pass between them in utter silence, Felix staring into his eyes with such a searching fierceness that Chan feared all of his secrets were putting on a picture show just for them to see (what is that saying: that eyes are the window to the soul? Can Felix see his soul? They did say that they see everything...) They don’t seem to find the answer they are looking for, though, averting their blazing blue to the side in what appeared to be bitter acceptance (perhaps it was just Chan’s imagination, but they seemed annoyed every time they searched his gaze for something. Why? He’s not quite sure but, maybe, they are just expecting to see a certain reaction or answer that Chan just never seems to give). 

“I-” Felix backtracks once again, choosing to guard what they really wanted to say, “Are those fish for me?”

Chan’s frown deepens but he gives a nod, turning around to grab the bag forgotten on the floor. Trust takes time, he tells himself over and over again. Felix needs time and he must not force himself upon them; he must remain patient (which was seriously _not_ one of his strong suits) and positive about it all and let the mer go at their own pace. They will open up when they’re ready ( _even if Chan’s_ _frickin assistance would be a lot more useful if he actually knew exactly what was going on half the time_ ). He hands the bag over and tries to give an inviting smile (but he knows by the wrinkle of Felix’s nose that it most certainly fell short) as he says, “I wasn’t sure what or how much to get so I just got the three biggest fish they had.”

A brief upward quirk accompanies Felix’s mouth as they snatch the bag from his hand, dark pink tongue peeking out to run over their chapped and bitten lower lip. Chan follows the movement without realizing it, still awkwardly standing in front of his house guest and now shamelessly staring at them with the intention to record every single detail.

The mer apparently notices as well and looks up at him with an odd expression on their face, almost amused and… mischievous maybe? 

“Would you like me to share or is there something on my face?” They question, the ice color returning to their orbs as they widen them to a doe-like innocence.

Ah yes, they were definitely acting coy now. Chan quickly shakes off the desire to taste those cupid bow lips and clears his throat as an excuse to completely disregard the inquiry. “I’ll get you some dryer clothes,” he states mostly unwavering, “And maybe an ice pack?”

Felix’s pupils fill out but that nearly glowing blue returns in an instant; “Water,” they reply, “Just water will suffice,” before carrying the fish with ease to the guest bedroom and disappearing behind a closed door.

* * *

It is dark in the room as Chan enters with a glass of water.

There are no lights on. Not only are the curtains drawn in the window but all the blankets on the bed and several towels are placed over it as well, sufficiently blocking out all of the sunlight that would be filtering in during this time of the day and shrouding the room with an ominous vibe. 

He sees Felix curled up in a ball in the middle of the bare bed (it's basically just a mattress and a pillow at this point), the sight reminding Chan of the common coiled position the mer would form when they still had a tail.

They looked small and vulnerable so tightly wound around themselves in the center of the queen sized bed, eyes screwed shut and body giving off the occasional shudder.

“Are you cold?” Chan asks, brow slightly furrowed as he glances from the mer to the covered window.

Felix cracks a single eye open, the iris _actually_ glowing a faint indigo color and pupil nothing more than a mere slit. “It is not safe for you to be in here, human,” they mutter, voice impossibly deep yet there was no threatening edge like the other dubious comments uttered from the siren’s mouth (that’s a good sign, right?).

“Oh? And why is that?” the man questions in a slightly defensive tone (this was _his_ beach house, after all. He had the right to enter any room he wanted… Even if it already had an occupant), placing the glass on the nightstand before sitting at the foot of the bed. His eyes couldn’t leave Felix, especially now that their orb was like staring into a full moon in a clear night sky.

The mer groaned, whether in annoyance or pain Chan isn’t sure. “I have less control over my instinctive tendencies; it would be in your best interest to leave,” they say, intense gaze making the man squirm and honestly want to stay longer (Felix has so many freckles; they can be the stars in the clear night sky; how many do they have? Chan should count them). 

“You are sick so nurse Bang Chan is at your service,” the man replies with an awkward giggle, “How about I rewrap your feet at least?”

“Don’t touch me,” Felix warns but once again there is no bite to their words, sounding more like advice given by a good friend (the thought makes Chan smile; are they finally friends now?).

“I can’t help you if I can’t touch you, silly,” Chan tsks playfully, reaching a hand towards the mer’s ankle with an intention of comfort but he isn’t sure if it is for himself or them.

“Christopher, don’t,” the use of his full name makes him halt immediately (has Felix ever genuinely used his name?), “It’s only going to make it worse.”

“Worse?” He retracts his hand, standing up and looking a little bewildered as some of the fuzziness in his head (that he never realized was there before his name seemed to sober him up a little; was he drunk? He kind of feels drunk; he doesn’t remember drinking anything though) clears. He pouts, “I make you feel worse?”

Both of their eyes fully open now, the mer's gaze holds an expression that’s debatable but their lips are down turned like an adult may do when regarding a small, upset child. They don’t appear so vulnerable anymore. “No, worse for yourself.”

His eyes widened in confusion. “Myself? What’s wrong with me?” 

“You are not thinking clearly-”

“I am-”

“You are not,” they insisted, sitting up in the bed with a glare, “Go away before you do something you’ll regret.”

Chan feels nervous for some reason, swallowing roughly as their irises swirl with that dark rain cloud color. He wants to touch Felix, he wants to prove that touching them will not bring them harm; he wants to assure them that they are safe with him; he wants so much and is getting so little that he feels quite lightheaded now. He might fall; he thinks he’s going to; oh he’s definitely going to. Everything is spinning but he surprisingly feels on top of the world, like he can take over anything he desires and he will most certainly be successful if he tries. It scares him; why does he feel the need to claim _exactly_ what he wants regardless of how that may make the other feel, regardless of what _they_ want. 

“Breathe,” someone instructs suddenly, their deep voice cutting through the fog, “Holding your breath will not prevent you from succumbing to the craving.”

“H-Huh?” the man responds dumbly, the tunnel vision on the only other person in the room fading some.

“You are exhausting yourself trying to fight the inevitable. Breathe before you become unconscious.”

Chan wasn’t really listening, senses gradually returning, “W-Why can I hear you now? Before I- I couldn’t hear _anything_ except what my head was saying… And I could only see y-you.”

Felix’s eyes were no longer glowing, their pupils were wider and more… _human_ than the previous feral cat-like look they were sporting with what felt like just moments ago. “I know,” they reply, their attention completely on him despite their hands rolling the half-drank glass of water back and forth between their palms. When did they drink that? Since when were they at the edge of the bed? Since when was he standing right in front of them? He shivers. “You should be better now.”

He cocked a brow. “I _should_ ? How can I be _better_ after whatever that was? Why are you so calm right now? What do you know that I don’t?!” he cries almost hysterically, eyes comically wide and hands flying through the air, “For the love of God, can you please explain what the hell is going on? You've done nothing but hide things from me!"

The mer’s jaw ticks, their second lid slowly crossing their eyes as they watched him. “That was a contradiction: you praised your God and then referenced hell,” Felix feels the need to point out, earning an even more confused expression on the man’s face. They release a soft trill in amusement as Chan becomes more annoyed when they remain quiet afterwards, clearly waiting for them to elaborate or to at least add on to their comment. 

“You really like control, don’t you?” The mer questions instead, the man only able to blink at them as he processes the sharp turn of the conversation, “It’s eating you up inside that you have to follow another’s speed, that you don’t know what is happening or what will happen and nobody is giving you any answers; you feel powerless and it's killing you.”

“What- No, I-” he scowls, “Whatever it is that you’re doing right now, it’s not going to work. Just answer my questions; I deserve at least that after all the messing with my head you've done, right?”

They narrow their eyes at him and say coldly, “You are entitled to nothing from me.”

Chan glares at them and Felix only returns it with an irritated, “And unless you wish for me to _mess with your head_ again, I suggest you leave before that water finishes circulating through my system.”

He feels so angry, so annoyed and tired and absolutely _powerless_ , (the mer was _right,_ they were completely _right_ and he feels so foolish and exposed for being such an _easy_ target to their mind games) that he just… he just turns around and walks away, slamming the bedroom door closed behind him. 

* * *

Chan falls asleep on the couch, having spent most of his day sitting there waiting for Felix to emerge from their chambers. The door never opened and no sounds were ever heard from inside… yet the man still sat there in case the siren needed him or decided to have a change of heart. He wasn’t entirely sure what compelled him to still care after how clearly Felix has displayed their indifference towards him, maybe he just sympathizes for all that they’ve gone through; maybe he knows how it feels to have people give up on you while you’re going through a dark time in your life; maybe he finds their standoffish demeanor as a challenge he wishes to overcome; maybe the mer boy is just so beautiful and alluring that the godly sight of them has completely melted his brain; maybe he’s just crazy… He doesn’t know. But what he _does_ know is that he’s not going to leave them behind and if that means staying on this couch until they grant him their presence, so be it. 

Or, at least, that’s what his stubbornly opportunistic mind was thinking before the evening bowl of ramen and YouTube video recommendations from Jisung knocks him out upon the couch cushions with his phone still in his hand.

The sun slowly dips low into the sky until nothing but the moon is left visible, Chan’s mouth having fallen open some time not long before that with a small dribble of drool making its way down his chin.

A door opens not far from the living room, a ghastly figure emerging with an empty glass in their hand. They make their way to the kitchen and set it on the counter before turning to the couch with a sigh.

The mer moves the phone to the coffee table and just watches the man sleep for a few moments. They seem to hesitate for a second before steeling their features and lifting the man up off the sofa. Chan does not awaken or stir as Felix carries him to his bedroom, only snuggles his head into the intense heat radiating from their chest. The mer’s nose wrinkles in disgust as the human’s drool smears across the front of their shirt but they still allow Chan to cling onto them even as they push open the door with their foot and place him gently onto the bed.

Felix sits on the side of the mattress, studying the human’s face as he frowns and whines softly in his sleep at the loss of warmth from the other. 

A displeased grunt leaves their lips before they begrudgingly sweep the dark and frizzy hair on the man’s forehead to the side, muttering, “You are such an overgrown child.”

Chan’s face relaxes again as their fingers curiously run through the man’s dry locks, expecting them to be a lot softer from their curly appearance.

Felix begins humming an unnamable melody as they continue their careful ministrations, observing the content sigh that leaves Chan and the smile on his lips as he slips into an even deeper slumber with pleasurable images of achieving his greatest dreams while being surrounded by his closest of friends. 

And it is only when Felix finishes their song and removes their hand from his hair that they say in a barely audible voice, “Until I know exactly the kind of person you are and what is going to become of me in these coming days... the less you know, the better. Sometimes, ignorance is greater than having the answers to everything.”

They stand and go to leave the room, pulling the door closed behind them with a whisper of “Sleep well,” left in their wake.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Felix's "effect" on Chan at certain moments but not all of them may seem confusing now but I promise that all answers will be revealed in due time!


	3. Enraptured With Those White Diamonds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Hm.” Felix grins, their sharp pointed teeth glimmering like rows of white diamonds under the sunlight, “Does my appearance intimidate you then?”
> 
> Chan swallows around the lump in his throat, not missing the roguish undertone to their voice as they clearly dropped it an octave lower. “No…” They quirk a brow, “Well maybe a little,” their eyes turn to crescents, “B-But not for the reason you think!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi again!  
> Gets angsty before it gets SUPER fluffy;)
> 
> Also, slight chat-fic section

There’s a faint poppy beat playing through the quiet bungalow that slowly rises Chan from the depths of sleep: it’s catchy and vaguely familiar, he realizes, with an annoying dull buzz accompanying it. He sits up, squinting his eyes at the nightstand and blindly slapping his hand down to feel around for his phone. He frowns when he realizes that it’s not there, looking down at the floor and feeling around in the covers. Then it registers that the ringtone sounds far too quiet to be in his room. 

Chan immediately stumbles out of bed, hair a mess and eyes crusty with sleep as he pulls open the door and sees the noisy device slowly vibrating its way off the table. He catches it right before it falls, quickly clicking the answer icon after grumbling, “Persistent lil’ bogan,” under his breath.

“Hello?”

_ “Hyung! You asshole, how dare you make me wait!”  _ He hears the squeaky Korean and suppresses a groan even as a drowsy smile spreads across his lips.

“Language, Sungie,” he reprimands lightly, “I was sleeping.”

_ “What? You sleep?”  _ Another voice chimes in sarcastically.

“I’m on speaker?”

_ “Yeah, Minho hyung wanted to talk to you too.” _

_ “Somebody had to make sure you were still alive,”  _ Minho said dryly but Chan could hear the grin in his voice,  _ “Innie is sad that you haven’t sent pictures.”  _

“Oh, yeah, sorry about that I’ve been- uh…” He sends a glance at the closed guest bedroom door, “Busy.”

_ “Huh? Busy?”  _ Jisung says cheekily,  _ “I know that tone, Hyung~”  _ Chan is only half-listening to the teasing, eyes still on the door with a frown. They still haven’t come out? Are they hungry? Thirsty? Have they used the bathroom? Wouldn’t his ringing phone wake them up? Are they still angry with him?

“What tone?” he mumbles distractedly, wandering into the kitchen with a yawn.

_ “Your I-just-got-laid tone,”  _ Minho cackles at Jisung’s response,  _ “So who’s the lucky girl?” _

_ “Or guy!”  _ Minho adds quickly,  _ “We don’t discriminate.” _

Chan shakes his head despite them not being able to see him, pouring a cup of day old coffee into a mug. “Laid? No, no you guys got it all wrong- I haven’t- You know I don’t just smash and dash; I gotta take them on a date first, at least.” He takes a sip, looking over the counter at the couch. Didn’t he fall asleep on the couch last night?

_ “Them?! So there is someone!”  _ Jisung nearly shrieked into his ear, causing Chan to wince,  _ “So who are they? Are they Australian? Would we know them? What are they like? How’d you guys meet?” _

His gaze scans the counter lazily, "Oh um they are… no one. I’m not seeing anyone." He takes another sip.

_ "No one, eh?"  _ Minho said incredulously, _ "Doesn't sound like no one…"  _ Chan's eyes catch on an empty glass,  _ "Oh I see now: you haven’t made a move yet but they're there with you, huh?"  _

He chokes, brown orbs widening to an astronomical size as he spits coffee all over the counter.

Felix did leave to return the cup; Chan did fall asleep on the couch but he woke up in his room. Did they carry him to his bed last night?

His face turns fifty shades of red at the thought, remembering vaguely an intense warmth that encompassed him and feelings of safety and contentment. Minho was right: he  _ doesn't  _ sleep but that was probably the deepest and most peaceful slumber he has ever had. Did Felix have something to do with it?

_ "Hyung? Are you okay?"  _ The younger asks in concern as he continues his coughing fit and flustered sputters.

_ "Don't coddle him, Jisung,”  _ Minho scolds but Chan can easily imagine the mischievous twinkle in his eyes,  _ “Hyung just told us all we needed to know: there’s someone there with him.” _

_ “Wait, they’re at your beach house but you’re not sleeping with them?” _

“They carried me to bed…” Chan squeaks to himself not having even heard the others’ comments, placing the phone on speaker before setting it and the mug of coffee onto the counter so he could bury his face into his hands, “Oh my god, I probably cuddled them; did their little mind tricks make me sleep better or something? Was the humming in my dream theirs? Oh my, oh my, oh my-”

_ “Hyung?” _

_ “Hey, Bang Chan, don’t ignore us; we’re still here, you know. We can hear you.” _

“Shit, wait-” he stammers immediately, panic filling his features as he launches towards the phone, “There’s no one else here! You heard nothing from me! I’m all alone in this beach house and there definitely isn’t a very hot merman sick in my guest bed!”

_ “Mer- what?” _

“AH! NOTHING!” he shouts and then sends a wary glance at the closed door before adding a little quieter, “No one is here, nope, just me and um… my pet goldfish.”

_ “Goldfish?” _

“Yup! I got them the day before yesterday.”

_ “But you said-” _

“They are a very  _ hot  _ goldfish, absolutely a beaut. Sickly little thing at the moment though, they’re resting in the guest bedroom.”

_ “Chan?”  _ He hears Minho say cautiously, _ “Are you sure you’re alright?” _

“Yes, of course; why wouldn’t I be?” He replies almost immediately, but then gets distracted as a loud thump in the other room sounds through the mostly quiet house. 

_ “It’s just... you’re kinda- no, you’re really acting weird, Hyung.” _

“Oh um, yes,” he says, picking up the phone and wandering closer to the source of the noise curiously, “Well you know me: I am weird. Weird Channie hyung.” An awkward giggle leaves him but it dies in his throat as he hears another, louder thump.

_ “What’s that noise, bro?”  _ Jisung asks in English this time.

“Um, nothing. I- I gotta go, I’ll call you back, yeah?” 

_ “Oi, no, you tell us what the hell is going on over there-” _

“Bye Minho, Sungie! We’ll talk soon, promise.”

_ “Christopher Bang, I swear-” _ Chan clicks the end call icon with a grimace, knowing that Minho was going to be pissed that he hung up on them. But his friends can wait; he’ll deal with that disaster of a conversation later. Right now, he needs to check on Felix.

Having learned his lesson from yesterday, Chan knocks on the door hesitantly, pressing his ear to the wood. “Hey, uh, is everything okay in there?”

He doesn’t hear a reply but there’s a soft shuffling of fabric.

“Felix?”

A slight whimper.

Chan’s expression instantly hardens as he announces, “I’m coming in.”

The door flies open in less than a second, the sight making the man gasp as he loses his serious demeanor and rushes forward frantically. “Felix!” 

The mer is crumpled on the floor, chest heaving up and down in ragged breaths and their entire body being consumed by shudders. Their clothes are soaked with sweat, hair stuck to their forehead and lips cracked.

He falls to his knees in front of them, his head becoming unbelievably fuzzy but his remaining focus still on Felix. They were just so- so  _ flushed  _ and their skin looked so  _ dry  _ and  _ flaky  _ despite the buckets of sweat staining their clothes. Their eyes were squeezed shut unbelievably tight but Chan had a feeling that their pupils were probably those feral-looking slits among a glowing indigo iris. 

_ Help them. Help them help them help them _ , his brain was blabbering but he didn’t know  _ what  _ they needed or  _ how  _ to do anything without touching them and Felix doesn’t want him to touch them and if he does, then they’ll be mad and he doesn’t want them to be mad at him and eat him because he doesn’t want to die but if he doesn’t do anything then maybe  _ they  _ will die and it will be all his fault and he would never be able to forgive himself and he is still isn’t  _ doing  _ anything and they need his help and-

“W-Water,” a voice breaks his downward spiral of thoughts and immediately Chan is throwing caution to the wind, reaching out to place a hand on Felix’s forehead. He yanks it back with a hiss: they were burning up, the skin scalding to the touch. 

“I-I need to bring down your temperature,” Chan rushes out, mind racing with the desire to  _ help them help them help them.  _ “Uh I’ll put you back in bed and get a cold compress and some medicine and um t-then if that doesn’t work, I’ll uh- I’ll- I’ll-”

“W-Water,” Felix repeats through panting breaths, “W-Want Water…”

Chan nibbles his bottom lip, “Yeah- Yeah I’ll get you a glass after I get you back into bed, ‘kay?”

“N-No,” they breathe, their now-clawed hand grasping at Chan's pants covered knee, “I-I n-need…”

Chan leans in closer, eyes wide with worry and fear, “What? What do you need?” 

Felix’s lids lift, their intense fiery gaze hitting Chan full force, “W-Water will h-help me.”

The irises were swirling, the blue becoming a muddled gray but glowing just as bright in the dim room and the man lets out a small cry of pain at the sheer power of the whims screaming in his head:  _ help them, you must help them; you want to help them, why aren’t you helping them? You should be helping them; water will help them, water will help them, WATER WILL HELP THEM- _

He exhales harshly, senses so hazy that he forgets where he is, who he is; but all he knows is Felix; all he sees is Felix; all he hears is Felix: every beat of their heart, every breath from their mouth. He’s becoming hysterical; he’s scared and confused but all he wants to do is help Felix but he’s still sitting here doing  _ nothing _ .  _ Get it together. Pull yourself together. Help them, water helps them. WATER WATER WATER- _

“Okay, okay, okay,” he mumbles to himself with a crazed look in his eyes, “A glass of water? No, no, no you deserve  _ more  _ water than that, you  _ need  _ more water than that; I help you and you need water and water helps you and I’ll get you water, hell, I’ll get you all the water, I’ll get you-”

They wince and it takes all of Chan’s will power to get off his train of thought and focus back to Felix’s condition. He scoops the mer up in his arms, saying in soft pleas, “Hey, hang in there; you’ll be okay, I promise, I promise… Just stay with me, okay? Close your eyes if it’s easier but stay with me.”

They squint at him, like their life depended on making sure he was entrapped by their silver orbs, before whispering shakily, “S-Sink.”

_ WATER WATER WATER HELP THEM THEY NEED WATER-  _ Chan rids the thought quickly away. “Sink? Like the bathroom sink?” he questions anxiously, noticing their grip on him becomes weaker and weaker by the second.

There’s a subtle shake of their head. “I s-sink.”

“You sink?” he stares at them in desperation and beseechment, “L-Like you need to sink?”

Felix’s face twists into a look of relief yet misery and moans breathily, “I-In w-water.”

An idea strikes Chan right across the face and he stands with the mer held tightly against his chest. “Any water?” he asks, crossing the room and entering the hallway.

They give a feeble nod of their head, eyes drifting closed again and body becoming more limp in his arms. 

“Come on, Felix; you gotta stay awake, mate. Just a little longer. I know you’re stronger than this, stick it out a little longer,” Chan nearly begs, running into the bathroom and sliding down to the side of the tub.

Felix groans in his arms, feeling like a furnace against him and vibrating his torso with their violent tremors. 

“It’s okay; everything is going to be okay,” he assures, in nearly tears, before turning on the faucet and plugging the drain with one hand as the other holds Felix impossibly close. The water is frigid as it begins filling the bathtub and Chan keeps his eyes on the shower curtain as he strips Felix of their clothes and lowers them into the tub. 

_ Help them help them help them; they need more help, they need more-  _ He grips his hair in frustration, observing the water level slowly rise until it reaches the tub’s maximum capacity. He turns off the faucet, racking his brain for what to do next.  _ Sink, they need to sink _ ; Chan gently pushes Felix’s body beneath the surface and watches as bubbles escape from their mouth and their back hits the bottom.

There’s a deep fear rising within Chan, one telling him that he may have just  _ drowned  _ the mer, but he pushes it aside and rests his forehead on the cool tile, letting out a small whimper of, “Please be okay.”

Seconds tick by in utter stillness, the anxiety creeping up Chan’s chest and threatening to swallow him. And then, all at once, the pressure pounding in his skull recedes as he hears a disruption in the water.

The man goes to lift his head but something wet and scaly smacks into his face with enough force to send him flying backwards right onto his ass. He lands with a loud thump, eyes dazedly coming to focus on a large crimson tail with tattered pink fins. “Felix!” Chan shouts with joy while ignoring the ache blooming in his nose and tailbone, scrambling back over to the side of the tub and peering down at the pretty mer boy.

Their regular, icy blue eyes are looking up at him, the most beautiful of smiles on their face as their temporal fins swish back and forth. And Chan feels the air leave his lungs as he, once again, is left mesmerized by their appearance but this time also being accompanied by a tide of relief washing over his bones and making him sigh and grin warmly in endearment as their orbs turn to crescents. 

“You’re- You’re a fish again and- and you’re alright,” he blurts dumbly, tips of his ears red in embarrassment that he didn’t think of anything grander to say.

Felix trills, a gurgled laugh quick to follow, before they rise to the surface. “I am not a fish,” they scoff when their head peeks out of the water, although their eyes practically sparkled with playfulness and their tail swung at Chan again to smack his arm.

Chan’s expression softens immensely, the grin slipping from his lips as he mumbles, “I was worried sick.”

Their head tilted slightly, “Sick? Is this an expression?”

Chan nods, “It just means I was really worried about you…”

Felix looks at their tail, gaze avoiding his in an almost submissive manner. “I did not mean to worry you,” they muttered with shame lacing their tone.

He quickly puts a hand on their tail in comfort, not wanting them to feel guilty. He didn’t really consider if Felix  _ wanted  _ him to touch them and he knew that they could feel his hand, but they seemed to not acknowledge it so he also didn’t bring attention to it. “Why didn’t you tell me that your human form wasn’t sustainable? I could have put you in here yesterday and this whole thing could have been avoided,” Chan says quietly, not wanting to startle them or make them think that he was angry. Because he  _ wasn’t,  _ just hurt. He was hurt that they didn’t tell him, hurt that he almost lost them. The atmosphere felt right to ask questions, something delicate around the both of them that persuaded Chan that they might be willing to give him answers. 

“I… I didn’t know what your reaction would be if you knew.”

He blinks, confused and surprised. “Knew what?”

“That the ocean was calling me; that I was weak and going through withdrawal.”

“What the hell?!” Chan cried in horror, “If I knew, of course I would have helped you! I would have gotten you into water a lot sooner! I’m- I’m not some kind of monster!”

“Well how was I supposed to know that!” Felix shouted, slapping their hand into the water in frustration. Chan flinched and immediately Felix deflated, hunching further into the tub with a frown. “I took a risk coming here,” they mumbled, “I took a risk becoming a human and going with a stranger and staying in their home. I am weaker as a human, at a disadvantage not being in water but I would be in an even greater danger had I returned to the ocean while injured and alone and vulnerable to predators, humans, and even other sirens.”

He remains quiet, listening intently as his hand on their tail tightened subtly to encourage them to continue. “I-I thought that I could handle the withdrawal long enough until I recovered from my injuries; I wanted to return to the sea as soon as possible but it is hot here, my body dried out faster than I anticipated, and I wasn’t… strong enough to make it on my own.”

“Felix,” Chan says sadly, “I gave you my word that I wouldn’t harm you, remember? You didn’t have to deal with this alone; you didn’t have to  _ suffer _ .”

“It is easy to say one thing and do another. It is easy to give me your word but then again, there is also nothing to stop you from deciding to go against it.” They meet his eyes, lips a thin line, “I was forced into this situation, facing threats no matter what my decision was and this seemed to pose the least danger.”

“You were forced to put your safety in my hands without truly knowing my intentions…” He understands now, their hesitance and wariness. They knew what a human was capable of, what someone aware of their weakness may do to take advantage of them; it’s not everyday that you find an injured siren, it is not everyday that the siren is showered with hospitality and warmth without having to give something in return.

“You could have left me to die, locked me in a room and let me shrivel if you knew that I couldn’t go long without water. You could have waited to betray me until I was too weak to stop you and there would be nothing I could do about it: I wouldn't be able to control my abilities or run away… I would be defenseless and held as your prisoner. I didn’t even know this tub  _ could  _ fill with water.”

"That sounds… terrifying," Chan murmurs, silently thanking fate that he was the one to find Felix, not someone else who would have used them to make a quick buck. “I’m sorry for giving you a hard time for not trusting me-”

They shake their head in a gesture to shush his apologies, swallowing. “You are right: not all people are bad,” they say suddenly, the shine in their eyes seeming to be hiding a secret as they sit up in the water and bring their face awfully close to Chan’s. He goes rigid, fearing that exhaling too heavily may push them away and disturb the charged tension between them. “But sometimes impure desires may corrupt them and make them do bad things even if they knew they shouldn’t. It is often that I bring out the worst in people.”

“And you can’t control it when you’re going through withdrawal,” Chan breathes, it beginning to make sense why his own thoughts ran rampant while their irises were glowing with the call of the ocean.

Felix nods, “I brought out your deepest desires, I made you want to achieve things you may not have otherwise thought of doing. Any other person probably would have demonstrated man’s corrupted nature but… but you...”

He feels bashful as a look of awe fills Felix’s eyes and they give a nearly blinding smile, “Even when I was completely unrestrained, you still wanted nothing more than to help me.” 

“U-Uh well u-um I… I…”

“It is nothing to be ashamed of, Christopher,” Felix chuckles at Chan’s flushed ears and flustered stammering, their breath fanning his cheeks, “I know now that you are a pure person on the inside too and I’m deeply grateful for it. I am in your debt and… and honored to call you my friend.”

“O-Oh,” Chan replies after what felt like an eternity, not really knowing how to reply to something like that and unable to stop the shy smile on his lips and quickening pulse, “You’re welcome..?”

Felix hums, seeming satisfied with the sheepish answer as they leaned back to encompass their body in water.

“Also, you don’t have to call me Christopher.”

“Your name is Christopher, is it not?”

“Well yes but I-”

“Then do you not like your name?”

“I do, it’s just- my other friends- they call me Chan.”

They look at him curiously. “Why?”

“Erm the place... where I work, I have to use a Korean name. So I go by Chan.”

“Korean name?” Felix frowns, “I want another name… If I call you Chan, will you give me another name?”

The man gazes at them dotingly, “Yeah, sure, mate. I’ll think of something.”

They smile, closing their eyes and releasing a sigh of content.

He just watches them for a few moments in silence before they perk up and ask, “Now that this has been solved… Can I have more fish?”

Chan laughs heartily, feeling warmth in his chest as he pats their tail twice and stands. “Of course, lemme just go get dressed and grab my wallet and I’ll head down to the market.”

They trill happily in response.

* * *

He’s standing in front of the same fish stall as the day before when he feels a buzzing in his pocket. Chan pulls out his phone and double taps the screen, seeing a notification from Jisung.

**Sungie**

Hello~

Binnie hyung and I made a new beat today. We were wondering if you would listen to it when you get a chance

_ Sent 12:30pm  _ ∣∣  _ Read 12:30pm _

**Channie-Hyung**

Yeah, sure. Send me a link and I’ll check it out tonight

_ Delivered 12:31pm  _ ∣∣  _ Read 12:31pm _

**Sungie**

Tonight??

Wow hyung~

Whatcha up to all day? ;)

_ Sent 12:31pm  _ ∣∣ _ Read 12:32pm _

Hey! Don’t ignore me! >:C

_ Sent 12:36pm  _ ∣∣ _ Read 12:37pm _

**Channie-Hyung**

Sorry, I’m picking up fish at the market right now

_ Delivered 12:37pm  _ ∣∣ _ Read 12:37pm _

**Sungie**

Fish? You cooking for that mysterious house guest of yours?

_ Sent 12:37pm  _ ∣∣ _ Read 12:38pm _

**Channie-Hyung**

No..?

Am I not allowed to cook for myself?

_ Delivered 12:39pm  _ ∣∣ _ Read 12:39pm _

**Sungie**

You and I both know that you don’t go out of your way to cook food 

just for yourself hyung

You’re a simple creature

That eats ramen

And convenient store sausages

Not fancy fishes from the market

_ Sent 12:40pm  _ ∣∣ _ Read 12:41pm _

**Channie-Hyung**

….

Don’t you have someone else to bother

_ Delivered 12:42pm  _ ∣∣ _ Read 12:42pm _

**Sungie**

Rude >:{

You love me 

But I guess I could go bother my baby instead ‘3’

_ Sent 12:43pm  _ ∣∣ _ Read 12:43pm _

**Channie-Hyung**

Yeah, bother Minho

Also,

Tell him I’m sorry for hanging up on him, something important came up

_ Delivered 12:44pm  _ ∣∣ _ Read 12:44pm _

**Sungie**

Oh no worries hyunggg 

He was only a little pissed 

But he’s good now

Because we know you’re busy with your new “friend” ;)

_ Sent 12:45pm  _ ∣∣ _ Read 12:45pm _

**Channie-Hyung**

Sure, whatever floats your boat, mate *Typed in English*

I got stuff to do now, bye bye

_ Delivered 12:46pm  _ ∣∣ _ Read 12:46pm _

**Sungie**

Okieee

Bye hyung

Don’t forget to use protection! 0;)

_ Sent 12:47pm  _ ∣∣ _ Read 12:47pm _

Chan shook his head as he turned off his phone.  _ This kid _ , he thought in fond exasperation as he pulled open the front door of the beach house.

“Honey, I’m home~” he said with a small giggle before it kind of dawned on him that Felix probably wouldn’t understand the joke behind it. What if they took it seriously? What if they thought Chan was hitting on them? What if they questioned him about what the expression meant and then Chan would have to go into an awkward conversation about when people say that and how it definitely wasn’t applied here in an appropriate manner and-

His mortified thoughts come to a screeching halt when he hears a thick Australian twang of, “Good morning,” call back.

Chan feels butterflies all over, an easy grin slipping onto his face as he quickly slides out of his shoes and shuffles over to the bathroom with the bag of fish in hand (They were learning the expressions  _ he  _ uses… and  _ using  _ them!).

“But it’s afternoon, Felix,” he chuckles, seeing them look up in the water at his arrival.

Their bottom lip juts, making the man internally coo. “Does that make it not good?”

“No, no,” he assures, sitting next to the tub, “It’s still good but it’s just not morning anymore.”

“Oh… I see,” the mer mumbles, their temporal fins drooping in disappointment.

“Hey, it’s okay; you’ll get used to the expressions soon with just a little bit of practice, yeah?”

Felix nods, squirming slightly in the tub. “I want out,” they say, looking at him with a question in their icy eyes, “It’s cramped in here.”

Chan blinks at them in confusion a couple of times before he realizes what  _ getting out  _ would imply. “O-Oh- Uh-” his ears flush, another nervous giggle bubbling to the surface as Felix patiently waits for an answer. 

“You can close your eyes,” the mer offers, expression completely serious as they add, “You won’t have to bear the ugly sight of my human body that way.”

Chan wheezes, having accidentally choked on his spit, letting out a small squeak of “ _ U-Ugly _ ?!” before breaking down into mindless sputters (honestly, he needs to stop choking on things today; twice in one day? That’s kind of pushing it).

Felix just observes him blankly. “Yes, you wish for me to be covered by your garments so you can not see my body.”

“W-Well not because y-you’re  _ ugly _ !” Chan nearly whines, hot in the face as he wonders how such a jaw-droppingly  _ gorgeous  _ creature such as Felix could  _ ever  _ reach such a conclusion. Have they even  _ seen  _ themselves? Who cares about what Chan thinks: he would be the blindest idiot on the entire planet if he called Felix’s body  _ ugly _ and he’s sure every living being with working eyes would be inclined to agree. 

Their tongue clicks, sitting up in the water to be up in Chan’s personal space again; their second eyelids blink slowly. “If not because I’m unappealing, then why?” Felix asks, appearing intrigued rather than accusatory which makes Chan irrationally nervous that the mer was so willing to accept that they were not up-to-par just because they thought Chan did (did they really trust his opinion that much?). 

“Um…”

“Is it because I appear as a male that you get uncomfortable?”

“What? No!” the man says a little more fervently than he meant to, lowering his voice as Felix stares at him in surprise, “It’s n-not because you’re a boy.” He has to look away to control the fast thumping of his heart at the mer’s proximity, at the visible constellations of freckles and plump cupid bow lips. He inhales sharply, “You are definitely  _ not  _ ugly; you’re actually  _ really _ \- um really…”

They come even closer, if that was even possible, examining his expression with half-lidded eyes. Their mouth was just  _ so  _ close, their breath  _ so  _ warm _ ,  _ their lashes  _ so  _ long and dark and full… He’s finding it hard to form a coherent thought. “Pretty,” he exhales airily.

“Hm.” Felix grins, their sharp pointed teeth glimmering like rows of white diamonds under the sunlight, “Does my appearance intimidate you then?”

Chan swallows around the lump in his throat, not missing the roguish undertone to their voice as they clearly dropped it an octave lower. “No…” They quirk a brow, “Well maybe a little,” their eyes turn to crescents, “B-But not for the reason you think!”

And Felix  _ giggles _ , oh God they actually  _ giggle,  _ something so ebullient and bubbly that the man actually feels  _ pained  _ by the immense amount of adorableness an individual can emanate in a matter of seconds. He’s breathless all over again and all they’d have to do is  _ ask  _ him and he’d be willing to drop everything just to hang every single star in the sky if it meant seeing them looking at him like  _ that.  _ And he decides, right then and there, that  _ that  _ grin and  _ that  _ giggle is his most favorite example of lightness in the world; he decides that, if it is required of him, he’d sign away his frickin soul just to witness Felix so unguarded, unfiltered, and genuinely  _ happy _ . 

He’s leaning in before he even realizes it, the delighted twinkle in swirling ashen orbs giving him all the confidence he needs to just seal the deal; unfortunately, he has to stop when something with an acicular edge presses delicately over his heart.

He snaps out of the trance, looking down and goes dry in the mouth as he sees that the  _ something _ is Felix’s clawed finger. 

“Clothes,” they reminded in amusement.

“R-Right.” Chan stands and rushes out of the bathroom in an embarrassed frenzy, nearly tripping as he hears Felix chuckling at him.

He had never ripped clothes out of his suitcase so fast, back to his spot near the tub in three minutes flat with red ears. The man places the folded black t-shirt and basketball shorts on the closed toilet lid, turning back to the mer with a sheepish smile.

He looks from their face to their tail and then settles on the far corner of the tub, unsure of how to initiate the kiss now that he is very aware of what is going to happen. He knows that it’s not supposed to be intimate, he knows that Felix is just wanting to convert to their human form and sees kissing as nothing more than a task to complete. So why is he overthinking this? What’s stopping him from just gripping both sides of Felix’s stupidly beautiful face and kissing them until they’d never be able to kiss another without picturing his lips? As horrible as it may sound, he wants to ruin them for others. He wants to take advantage of this moment and spark something within them the same way they did to him. 

But he’s whipped, so completely and utterly whipped, and finds himself frozen in place with nerves as Felix gives him a coy smile. 

The mer places a hand over his eyes, Chan only knowing they leaned in by the feel of their warm breath upon his ear.

“Worry not; I won’t bite,” there is a slight shifting, Chan feeling a butterfly’s touch of lips against his as lungs stutter in his chest, “No matter how tempting you may be...”

And when their lips locked with his, Chan’s vision dulled to the world by a small hand, he could easily say that this was the best (and sexiest) kiss of his entire life. Something about losing one of the senses just made all the others become so much more  _ attuned  _ with the experience,  _ attuned  _ with Felix. The softness of their lips, the curious caress of their tongue, the tingling through his body; the gentle swish of the water as their form morphs, the ragged breathing from their air-tight seal on his mouth, the pounding of his heart as it rushes blood to his face and lower extremities; the smell and taste of a fresh crispness that only the salty ocean could provide, as well as an intriguing trace of something floral he couldn’t quite identify. All of it was just so… so  _ much  _ that he felt like a fire was trying to consume him from the inside out and it was awfully  _ exciting _ , to say the least, even as the mer pulled away with a wet pop.

His sight isn’t returned to him until Felix is standing outside of the tub with a towel around their waist. Gone are the webbings, fins, and scales, replaced by a nearly angelic looking man with very not human-like eyes peering at him in a zany sense of cheekiness.

“Thank you,” they say with obvious placidity, pupils a little more dilated than usual.

Chan had to clear his throat and wipe at his swollen, spit-slickened lips for a few moments before being recovered enough from his lustful daze to mumble, “Uh sure, n-no problem.”

They stare at him, seemingly waiting for something as the seconds tick by.

The man nearly squirms on the floor, only restraining himself to hide the uncomfortable tightness in his pants. 

Eventually, Felix sighs. “I will be putting clothes on now..? Whether you stay there or not is up to you.” They turn their back to him, reaching for the pile waiting nearby.

“Oh! Right! Sorry!” Chan blurts, quickly leaving the bathroom without a second glance (even though he’s pretty sure he heard the mer snort like they were entertained by his behavior. Which, knowing them, they probably were...).

* * *

The couch feels stiff beneath him as he pulls out his laptop. He’s not sure why he feels so antsy, he’s not sure why he keeps glancing behind himself towards the guest bedroom door. 

Maybe he’s feeling a little lonely; maybe he thought that since he knows more about them and their secrets, the two of them were closer now. Maybe his head is still a little fogged up after the intensity of the kiss earlier and his mind is playing with his heart, trying to tell him that it meant  _ more  _ than just a task (they didn’t have to cover his eyes, they didn’t have to flirt with him before it, they didn’t have to turn it into a heated make-out session when the first time was just a simple placement of lips on lips; they didn’t have to cover themselves up afterward, wait for him to leave before getting dressed, and then flirt with him  _ again.  _ But maybe he’s just overthinking). 

And that’s when Chan realizes that he has fallen hard for the mer, not just because they’re beautiful but also because they are mysterious but entirely honest, powerful but secretly insecure, and blunt but oddly considerate (with their own special way of showing it). 

He's in deep waters now and he knows that this arrangement is anything but permanent: it'd be better to not get attached but it seems like he already is (is he really this easy or has he just not gotten laid in a while?). Actually, the real question is: since Felix supposedly knows his desires, are they aware of the way he’s starting to feel about them? And if they are, are they purposefully teasing him?

He kind of wants answers now, answers to questions he will never get the guts to ask though so he plugs in his earbuds and pulls up the music file that Jisung sent him. 

The slow paced, electropop beat fills his head in a second’s notice; he lets the melody wash over him, lets it crowd out all of his plaguing thoughts. He just does what he does best: produces music. 

His head starts bobbing to the rhythm, mouthing along to certain high points and making mental notes of what can be changed to improve the effect. He’s so focused on the computer that he doesn’t even notice another figure settle down next to him on the couch.

“What are you doing?” 

He jumps, pausing the music and snapping his head towards the mer who was observing his behavior with interest. 

Chan smiles, feeling a little self-conscious now but giddy at the thought that they came out of the room and sought out his company. “Oh um… I’m listening to something,” he replies, a warm feeling in his stomach.

Felix tilts their head, a small noise being made in their throat that Chan has learned to associate with them being avid to understand. “Why?”

“Ah- um,” he looks from his laptop back to them, “It’s kind of my job. I make music and produce it with my friends.” 

“Produce?”

“Yeah we- we share our songs with the world so other people can hear them too.”

Their eyes widen slightly, a strange sparkle in their irises as they lean into his space to see his screen. “People  _ want  _ to listen to your songs?”

Chan’s brow furrows noticeably in confusion, “Yes..?”

Their lips downturn in thought, “But why? What do they get out of it?”

“Oh um… nothing, I guess. They listen because it’s enjoyable for them; they like how it sounds. It makes them... happy? I don’t know; people listen to music for different reasons and I suppose they all get a different experience out of it.”

Felix appears even more bewildered now, a cute scowl on their face as their ice blue orbs give him their full attention. “What do  _ you  _ get out of it?”

“Money,” Chan jokes but sobers up when he sees that Felix doesn’t find the humor in it. He sighs and rubs the back of his neck bashfully, “Recognition, I guess? I get to do what I love and find others who love it too; people support me by listening to my stuff and it just… feels good that people like my music. I work really hard so it’s nice to be appreciated.”

They wet their lips, Felix’s eyes darting back and forth in a searching manner. Chan isn’t really sure what they want from him so he just waits.

“I can see that you are really passionate,” they finally comment, “even if I don’t understand what’s pleasant about a simple human song.”

The man laughs, taking out his earbuds to hand one to them, “I’m sure it would make more sense if you listen to it.”

Felix stares at the offering and then back up at his face. “Put it in your ear,” Chan says with an encouraging smile, demonstrating with his own ear and the other bud, “Like this.”

They hesitantly take it from his hand and examine it for a while before sticking it in their ear.

Chan starts the music, closely watching their reaction. Felix’s expression appeared doubtful at first, but as the melody flowed, their muscles slowly relaxed and eyes lit up in delight. 

He panicked for a moment as a sapphire glint made itself present, flashing through their irises right before their eyes closed in apparent bliss. And then Felix starts humming along, deep and gravely, and Chan can’t even hear the music anymore because everything falls away around them. He’s completely enraptured by the scene in front of him, his mouth parts in awe and mind buzzes with each noise that leaves them. 

He feels like the notes become sheet music right before his eyes, painted through the air and wrapping around the two of them until there’s nothing except a little bubble separating them from the rest of the world: just him and Felix and this song.

> His heart is hammering in his chest as the couch and computer disappear, the mer taking his hand and leading him somewhere. They throw a warm smile over their shoulder, all teeth and pretty pink lips. And then Felix pulls him in: placing one of his hands upon their waist as they place theirs on his shoulder, their intertwined fingers never parting as they do so. 
> 
> Slowly their bodies begin to sway, the humming melody that seemed to surround them now the only sound to intrude upon the precious moment. 
> 
> Felix looks at him so fondly, so happy and enchanted and Chan can only imagine the endeared look upon his own face as the two of them waltz around the room. He spins them, pulling Felix even closer to his chest; they grin, closing their eyes as they place their forehead against his. Chan’s heart swells to almost the point of bursting, exhaling in content as the hand on their waist delicately moves up their side to cup their chin.
> 
> “I want to be yours,” Felix whispers, their breath intoxicating upon his lips and impossible to resist, “Make me yours.”
> 
> Chan smiles, “Well how can I say no to that?”

He doesn’t get a chance to close the distance.

The melody stops abruptly and the fantasy disperses into thin air, leaving Chan on the couch with a laptop in his lap and a silent earbud in his ear. He blinks rapidly, a whine threatening to escape him at the loss of the pretty little world and pretty little mer in his arms. The man looks to the side when he feels a heavy gaze upon him, meeting the inquisitive stare of Felix.

“What did you see?” they questioned but then the strangest thing happened: Felix  _ blushes,  _ the lovely shade of pink traveling all the way from their cheekbones to the bridge of their nose, before straightening up in their seat and taking a deep breath like they were trying to compose themselves. “I- I don’t mean to intrude… But uh...”

“Did… Did you do that?” Chan asks instead, wary if the illusion was created with his own thoughts or if Felix had an influence in the matter. 

The mer shrinks back guiltily, the earbud slipping as they hung their head to avoid his eyes. “I didn’t mean to. I shouldn’t have sung.”

His eyebrows raise in surprise. “That happens when you  _ sing _ ?”

Their jaw shifts, gaze downcast like they are angry with themselves. “It was by accident; it wasn’t my intention to affect you. I’m sorry, it won’t happen again. I’ll just- I’ll keep my mouth shut; take the music thing back so I won’t hear it and-”

“Hey,” Chan says with a frown, hesitantly placing a hand on their knee (their eyes went wide at the action but at least they stopped pulling away from him), “I’m not mad, it’s okay; it… caught me off guard is all.”

“You’re not angry with me?” Felix asks, blue orbs resembling that of a puppy’s as they looked up at him.

Chan chuckled, shaking his head. “Of course not... I-” his ears flush as he briefly lands on the mer’s lips, “I actually kind of enjoyed it…”

At this, they perk up. “That’s- That’s good; that it didn’t mess with your head _ ,  _ I mean.”

“Well it did,” Chan clarifies, but quickly adds before they feel bad again, “But not like… in a bad way?”

Felix nods, shuffling a smidge closer to Chan on the couch. “You… looked very happy,” they mumbled.

The man shifts as well, subconsciously knocking his knee into Felix’s. “Yeah?” he giggled, “Could you see it in my eyes?”

“Yes, your pupils were very dilated,” they replied, an endearing chirp to their voice, “But not with an unbridled hunger like the eyes of the lustful tend to do.”

“I-I see.”

There’s an awkward silence that hangs between them, Felix’s gaze on the earbud longingly. 

  
  


“May we… listen to another song?” They ask, “I’ll try not to hum.”

Chan smiles (only a little ashamed to admit that he was secretly disappointed by their second comment). “Sure, Lix; I have a few that I think you’d like,” he says, pulling up a playlist of some of his favorite songs. 

And if they felt his heart skip a beat when Felix gave him a dazzling smile before snuggling into his side, they didn’t mention it.

Just like Chan didn’t mention it when they started humming to the twelfth song and gave him a daydream so warm and pleasant, that it consequently lulled him right into a peaceful slumber. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for the nice comments on the last chapter:)  
> Do you think I'm moving things too quickly?


	4. Drowning in Some Silver Pools

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I- I can’t control it; I’m sorry,” Felix whispers, “I try so- so hard and I can’t control it and it just- it just brings out the worst of everyone. I didn’t want to hurt you but I did- I always do- I’m sorry.” They back away, Chan feeling another pulse of energy flooding his mind (comfort them, comfort them, comfort them; tell them you are sorry, tell them right now!) He stands up and takes a step towards the mer but Felix seems to cringe at the action.
> 
> “I’m doing it now, aren’t I? I’m- messing with your head again; I do manipulate y-you. You must feel so confused and frustrated; I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” Their voice was cracking with emotion, increasing in volume as the glow of their silver pools for eyes did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! Sorry I'm late!  
> This chapter I found very difficult to write; the transitioning phase of their relationship makes the scenarios and reactions differ from the previous chapters and ugh I was having so much trouble trying to show growth but not rushing into things too much. 
> 
> Hopefully it turned out okay:) It gets a little angsty for a moment

Chan is rather warm as he gradually comes to, a bit uncomfortable as something tickles his nose and another boney structure pokes into his ribs. When he stirs, his left side is immovable: not to mention oddly heavy and a little sweatier than the rest of his body. There is also a tranquil sound of breathing that he quickly realizes is not his own. 

His eyes sluggishly open, seeing the pale beams of light filtering through the windows from the early morning sun. Has he actually woken up before his alarm?

See, the thing about being an insomniac such as Christopher Bang himself is that it is very hard to fall asleep with his overworking mind but when he’s finally out, he’s  _ out. _ His phone has to be near his bedside with a full-volume alarm ready and waiting. He’s a morning person because most of the time he isn’t in bed long enough to fully enter a deep sleep before his alarm tells him to wake up; sometimes, he just doesn’t sleep at all and chugs whatever caffeinated drink he can get his hands on. Other times, the early trip to the gym with Changbin gets him going and pumped, especially when he comes home and takes a revitalizing cold shower.

But, he supposes, that it wasn’t always like this. He supposes that, once upon a time, a little Chris used to not have deadlines and contracts to worry about and actually could get a full night’s rest; a rest that would slowly coax him into waking after he got an adequate amount of sleep, a rest that would make his mind say  _ hey buddy you’re good now if you want to get up. _

It has been a long while since such a slumber has occurred though, at least not since before his trainee years. 

And under the current circumstances (with a less than ideal sleeping position too), he can’t help the overwhelming sense of confused elatedness that fills him. But then his squinting eyes come into focus and the shiny blonde head of hair nuzzled into the crook of his neck and tan elbow jabbing into his side becomes the answer to his puzzlement.

It was not  _ something  _ that made him sleep better, it was  _ someone. _

The two of them must have fallen asleep listening to Chan’s playlist; the thought makes him feel all mushy on the inside (especially when baritone humming comes to mind as he attempts to recall the last thing that happened before he drifted off). 

He fears to move, not wanting to disturb Felix and ruin the serenity of the moment, but he does gently tilt his chin to look down at the passed out form stuck to his torso. 

They look so soft and fluffy while they’re sleeping: gone with the daunting and defensive presence, with the occasionally too bold curiosity and rare moments of naïve shyness.

He smiles at how comfortable they look, knowing that something such as this would never have occurred just merely a day before. He also knows that if they weren’t asleep, they would not be hanging on him so blatantly; Felix thought humans were disgusting, after all, and typically didn’t desire physical contact from Chan (they seemed to tolerate it yesterday as a sign of trust but the man could still tell that they were uncomfortable). 

He appreciates their effort to be more open with him;  _ baby steps,  _ he tells himself. And, with them this close to him without having some cheeky intentions, Chan can admire their face without becoming a flustered mess. 

Of course the dusting of freckles is always the first thing that calls for attention but on closer inspection, he can see that they have even  _ more  _ than he originally thought. There were paler, fainter freckles literally splattered  _ all over their face _ , even their eyelids.

And their lips: he always knew that they were plump and had a lovely kissable shape but while they are sleeping, the two strips of pink are gently parted and extruded in a slight pout. He sees the indents upon the lower, now unmistakably recognized as bite marks. Did the mer nibble at their bottom lip in a sign of anxiety? It could make sense after everything that has transpired in the last couple of days. They almost died after all, and were kidnapped by shifty humans, and then had to come home with a complete and total stranger while having to keep nearly everything about them a secret for fear that Chan would use it against them. He’ll have to stop them from doing that before they unintentionally give themselves scars. 

Although Chan and Felix are both the same height, they have a much thinner and lissome frame; and while curled up as they are now, they appear even smaller, almost pocket-sized compared to him. And Chan internally coos because,  _ sue him,  _ he likes cute boys; and this isn’t just  _ any cute boy either.  _ This is a frickin powerful and majestic siren, capable of killing him if they so wish, with some of the most beautiful features he has ever seen and a deep ass voice that makes Chan squirm and want nothing more than to record every single word that leaves their mouth so he can add it to every transition or shift of mood in any song he so wishes. And their body… don’t even get him started on their snatched waist, abs sculpted by gods, and deliciously rounded bottom that he  _ knows  _ would fill his palm so perfectly, just like how he knows that their  _ very tiny  _ hand would look completely  _ dwarfed  _ compared to his- his… feet, yes, his big  _ feet _ … That’s exactly where his thoughts were going, not to an image entirely inappropriate and obscene for innocent eyes...

He should just keep that little image to himself before he gets too riled up…

The point is, like  _ this _ , Felix looks like something small and vulnerable that Chan wishes to protect with his entire life; and when he happens to remind himself that when they are awake, they look like something he’d willing worship and shower in kisses, he wishes to  _ devote  _ his entire life to them too. 

And it kind of scares him because his expectations for what his significant other should be like are now utterly  _ blasted out the window;  _ if they aren’t Felix, he doesn’t want them. Because Felix is literally everything he has ever wanted and  _ more; _ they are literally everything  _ and  _ some things he didn’t even know he wanted until he met them (can sharp teeth be a turn on? He thinks so). 

But there’s always that thought in the back of his head telling him that he doesn’t actually  _ know  _ how he feels, that it is all a trick of his mind as a result of the aura Felix emanates. 

The comment they made when Chan first met them is the culprit to the doubt, that  _ “The infatuation will fade with time”  _ because  _ “your body will get used to the lure.” _

So who’s to say that any of this feeling is even real? And who’s to say that whatever this  _ lure  _ is will lose its hold on him when Chan spends a longer period of time out of Felix’s reach?

Can he like Felix without it being the result of some otherworldly power beyond his control? 

Perhaps he should put it to the test…

The mer chooses that moment to shift against him, mouth now dangerously close to his quickening pulse and forehead brushing against his chin. They inhale deeply against the column of his throat like they caught a whiff of one of their favorite scents and Chan has to suppress a shiver at the content hum that rumbles through their chest.

He releases a breath he didn’t know he was holding as Felix relaxes against him once again, clearly still deep in sleep and unaware of their subconscious actions.

Chan jinxed it though when he thought the worst of it was over (of  _ course  _ he did) because then Felix is shifting into a much more compromisable position, their left leg hooking itself over his hips and left hand snaking up Chan’s other shoulder, short fingers dipping into the collar of his shirt and gently resting upon the tendon of his neck. This time, Chan couldn’t suppress the jolt through his system as Felix’s toned thigh rests innocently upon his groin, the shorts he gave them have ridden up to reveal an even wider expanse of unmarred skin.

They tighten their hold and Chan is powerless against the small groan that escapes him.

Their body stiffens at the embarrassing noise, and Chan prays, to all that is holy, that they can’t feel the morning wood in his joggers.

A single ice blue eye cracks open, pupil constricting as it greets the early light before meeting Chan’s mortified gaze. 

Felix’s expression is difficult to read as they just stare at him, clearly scanning over his flushed cheeks as they drawl nonchalantly, “Good morning.” Chan opens his mouth to reply but the words seem to get clogged in his throat as their gaze drifts down to his lap before slowly trailing back up to his eyes. “You look like you’re going to eat me.”

Now, if Chan was suave, he would probably have the right mind to say something sexy like:  _ maybe I will,  _ or a husky  _ you would enjoy that, wouldn’t you?  _ Or a  _ can you blame me when you have a body such as this? Keep tempting me and you’ll find out how it really feels to have a human lower half. _

But he’s not a gallant, he’s not sly or confident or even able to maintain a single coherent thought with the mer looking at him like  _ that;  _ maybe if Felix wasn’t so pretty, maybe if they were a simple human woman wooed by his muscles and dimpled smile and above average dick size (like Chan is accustomed to), he’d be able to utter more than a pathetic, “Y-You’re laying on me.”  _ Bravo, Chris; continue pointing out the obvious why don’tcha?  _

He knows that their eyes only looked down again for show. “It would appear so.”

An inhale. Silence.

Neither are quick to move, Felix searching his chocolate orbs for something again (or maybe they were waiting for him to make the first move?); either way, Chan feels hyper aware of all the places that their bodies are touching and might have even twitched a little at the domesticity of it all (if they had met under normal circumstances, would Felix have cuddled with him like this in bed every night? Were they secretly fond of skinship? Would Chan have been allowed to wake them up by drawing the big dipper into their freckles with gentle lips and pull their slim hips ever tighter against him?). Unfortunately, it seemed that he wouldn’t get the answers he wanted because the mer climbed off of him without another word.

They stretch, back popping much like it did the first night they met, before they wander into the kitchen for a glass of water. (They are an enigma; a frickin  _ enigma _ , he swears!)

Chan sits there in a daze for a few moments before finding his voice again.  _ New conversation, new conversation; need to stop thinking about Felix’s body!  _ “So, um, I am probably going to go see my family today. Other than fish, is there anything you need before I leave?”

There was something heated about the way Felix sipped their water so meticulously, Adam's apple bobbing in almost slow motion when they swallowed, eye contact kept the entire time even with the azure glint making itself present as the liquid entered their system. 

Chan crosses his legs, feeling uncomfortable as they basically stared through him and could see all of his body’s  _ excitement _ (he really did try to change the topic in an attempt to settle down but they just  _ can’t  _ look at him like  _ that _ , okay? He’s a simple man, a simple man with a big heart and a weak mind; he’s honestly surprised that he hasn’t given into his impulses yet). Were they going to stop drinking anytime soon? Could they at least answer him before they finish the entire cup? 

No, Chan couldn’t be that lucky: Felix drank the entire glass without pause before setting it back on the counter with a refreshed sigh, wiping their lips with the back of their hand. Finally, they ask, “So I will be alone today?”

The man felt guilty; he was kind of abandoning them in a mostly unused house all day, wasn’t he? He could always ask them to come with but that seemed like a disaster waiting to happen (he could already imagine the awkward introduction and tedious interactions between Felix and his siblings and not to mention the merciless teasing he would receive and- Damn, he’s really putting a lot of thought into this, isn’t he? _We’re not together; we’re NOT. Get your head out of the clouds, Chris. They could literally eat your family or something and you’d still be simping_ ) and it’s not like he could come to Australia for a week and just _not_ see his family. Yeah, it was a vacation away from _everything_ and _everyone_ but in the end, he still is very much an extrovert that thrives off of human interactions; besides, he hasn’t seen his family since _Christmas_! He’s already feeling guilty that he can’t spend the night over there (who knows what kind of trouble Felix could get into) so he might as well just spend the entire day with them and hope Felix will be okay alone.

“Y-Yeah,” he says after a deep sigh, “You’ll be alright, yeah? I won’t be too long- back before the night is over- I just haven’t seen them in a while and-”

“You don’t need to explain yourself,” Felix replies simply, face completely blank, “I am not holding you captive.”

Chan watches as they nibble on their bottom lip, a frown working its way across his face. “I know you’re not.” ( _ If anything, I’m holding you captive…  _ He refrains from planting that particular seed; who knows if they’d see it as ironic as he does or as a threat).

“Good.”

Awkward pause. The man fiddles with the side of the couch as Felix continues to stare.

“So… you don’t need anything?” He glances at their feet. “I could rewrap your um- your wounds if you want?”

They close their eyes, giving a gentle shake of their head. “That won’t be necessary; I have observed the process enough times to do it myself.”

“Alright…” He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t slightly disappointed. “Just fish, then?”

“Yes.”

“Okay. I’m going to take a shower first and then I’ll head over to the-”

The mer’s teeth sank a little harder into their lip, “Do you… Do you think you could…”

Chan raises an eyebrow in question but they have seemed to second guessed what they wanted to say, looking anywhere but at him ( _ highly  _ unusual). 

“Lix?”

“It’s nothing,” Felix appeared frustrated with themselves, head shaking ( _ again _ ; they kind of remind Chan of a dog getting splashed with water) as their freckled cheeks took on a pink hue, “Nevermind.”

With their remaining dignity still intact, the mer tried making a hasty retreat to the guest bedroom but Chan jumped up and blocked their path without really thinking, exclaiming, “Wait!”

His ear flushed at the startled look on Felix’s face, shrinking in on himself a bit and saying in a quieter (less  _ desperate _ ) tone, “You know I won’t judge you, right? You can ask me anything; if you need something, just tell me.”

The mer seemed to contemplate his words for a few moments before shaking their head yet  _ again _ . “I don’t need it; I’m fine-”

“But you want it so just tell me what it is so I can-”

“It’s- It’s selfish,” both brows raised, his mind reeling with possibilities, “I can’t keep asking it of you.” Felix releases their lip but just to push it into a small pout.

Chan feels himself melt a little; they were really thinking about his feelings now? They were trying to be considerate? He shouldn’t be as excited as he is. “It’s okay to be selfish sometimes,” he assures, attempting and failing to keep the hopeful yet curious after comment from slipping through his lips, “I doubt I would say no, anyways.”

“That’s exactly why I-” Their mouth snaps shut, hair looking awfully fluffy as their head shakes  _ another  _ time but, for a fleeting moment, Chan could see their gaze dart to a space behind him.

He tries to think of what it was that caught their attention: it couldn’t have been the guest bedroom, that was at the end of the hall, not on the left; that only leaves his room and the bathro-  _ Oh _ .

"Did you want me to fill up the tub again?"

Felix hung their head low between their shoulders (now they kind of look like a turtle; how can a single person have so many sides to themselves? A duality like Felix’s would be  _ killer  _ on stage; he can already see it), expression twisting to one of shame. 

Chan has the common sense not to giggle at their defeated behavior (but he  _ doesn’t  _ stop the fond smile painting its way onto his face; it would be hard  _ not  _ to smile when they looked so endearing). “Well, I mean, I could; I could totally fill it up and you could just get in whenever you felt like it but uh- you would have to wait until I get back to um- you know…”

“Turn me back?” They supply flatly.

“Yeah, but if you’re ok with that, then um-” he falters when they peek at him though their bangs and lashes, “I-I wouldn’t mind kissing you again.”

Their eyes widen. “I-I mean just to turn you back, you know! To kiss you and turn you back into your human form and all; it’s really not a problem for me because I like your li- LIKE HELPING YOU, yup. I’m a helpful guy and I can do this for you if you need it; no more withdrawal and passing out on my watch, nope, no sir.” He’s rambling now, he knows he is, but the mer just seemed to read between the lines of everything he says because supposedly his  _ eyes  _ give away all of his  _ desires  _ and he felt like he had to  _ justify  _ himself even if he sounded a little ridiculous (correction:  _ very  _ ridiculous).

But Felix didn’t seem to mind his blathering; in fact, their lips quirked in amusement. “Although I appreciate your honesty, I would rather not be crammed into a small space for a long time…”

Chan pushes down his previous embarrassment, suddenly filled with worry. “Are the… are the symptoms really bad and that’s why you wanted to take a bath? You don’t look really sick like last time.”

Felix opens their mouth and then closes it, confliction dancing in their eyes. “They are not too bad…” They started, arms crossing in a sign of discomfort, “But the longer I am out of water, the stronger my… my  _ abilities  _ get and if I were to pull people here by accident while you were gone…” 

They didn’t need to finish the thought; Chan had a pretty good idea of what would happen. 

“And waiting in the tub would be a no because if people were pulled in anyways, you’d be exposed and vulnerable.”

They nod. 

This was quite the problem indeed. Of course Chan couldn’t just leave them here alone now with all the risks presenting themselves. What if those foreign researchers found them? What if some crazy person barged into the house and attacked Felix? What if people started banging on the door demanding their hand in marriage or some criminal decided to kidnap them?

He really didn’t want to come home to a dead body and have to spend his night cleaning up the evidence. Bloodstains were a pain in the ass to clean out of carpet and the smell of bleach never really leaves tile. And then the matter of moving the body to dump it somewhere would prove to be quite difficult: for one, he’s running out of clothes to wear between himself and sharing them with Felix, so it would be less than ideal to have blood and whatever other dead bodily fluids staining his outfit. Then there’s the matter of getting it into a trunk without his neighbors noticing, oh and the smell of a corpse in his frickin car (even with all the money in the world, you can’t deep-clean away the stench of guilt); where would he even dump a body? In the ocean? Felix might find that offensive since it’s kind of their home; and then when the cops eventually find it, they’d find the mer's fingerprints everywhere (Chan would have the benefit of wearing gloves before handling the dead) and see the claw marks and if it wasn’t the researchers that were killed then they’d probably start their own investigation for where their missing mer was. Then, on top of all that hassle, Chan really didn’t want to be an accomplice in a homicide case; sure, he’d be leaving back to Korea in a couple of days later but that’d probably look super suspicious if he was  _ completely innocent  _ and then they’d be on to him and then his life would come to an abrupt halt and he would have let his friends down, his family down, himself down, Felix down- Wait, he’s putting way too much thought into this.

He’s not going to prison for assisting a murderer no matter how  _ much  _ he likes Felix. And who’s to say anyone would even have to die? Who’s to say that anybody would break in at all? Who’s to say it wouldn’t be Felix who was killed and Chan would walk in to find a dead mer or,  _ almost  _ worse, a missing mer? Who’s to say that the mer wouldn’t feel a little hungry and just dispose of the evidence themselv-

Off topic, off topic… Just the thought is making him shiver. He needs to focus on a solution or else he’s going to be late to his parents’ house and he still has to eat breakfast and get Felix breakfast and take a shower-

An idea strikes him. Chan perks up instantly and asks, “You only transform back to a mer if you’re completely submerged in water, yeah?”

Felix tilts their head curiously. “Yes- I mean,” they get a little quieter as they mumble mostly to themselves, “Am I expected to reply with yeah when you word it like that?”

Chan disregarded the second half of their reply, mind going a mile a minute, “And you need more water than just drinking a glass of it?”

They nod.

“Good, good,” Chan grins, turning around and walking towards the bathroom, looking back when he reaches the door just to see that the mer wasn’t following, “Come on, mate; I’ll show you how a shower works.”

* * *

The street is awfully dark as Chan drives his rental along the winding road back to the beach house. Music was blasting over the radio and his camera was jingling on the passenger seat (he realized that he promised to take a lot of pictures but only took about six on the boat trip with two being of the researchers carrying Felix... so of course he looked like your typical tourist at the fish market with each snap of the exotic fish in the stalls and then he took a few photos with his family as well. If he keeps it up for the rest of his time here, he’ll probably have an adequate amount of photos; he would never want to forget this vacation anyways). 

He was slightly anxious, to say the least, about what he would find when he arrived: was the house going to be a disaster? Would there be a body on the floor? What did Felix do all day? Were they okay? Were they lonely? Bored? Sad? Sickly? Hungry? …Missing him?

“Aish, what am I even worrying about? They’re fine!” Chan scolded himself, grip tightening on the steering wheel, “They are a full grown man- mer- person and can take care of themselves!”

A small, semi-hysterical giggle bursts forth, “And I’m talking to myself! So much for a vacation huh? Relax, they said! Ha!” He pulls into the driveway, pulling the keys from the ignition as he rests his head upon the wheel with a heavy sigh. “I’m a mess,” he mumbled, “What am I even doing with my life?”

He didn’t have an answer for himself and there was no one around to give him one so he exited the car and trudged his way to the front door.

Chan pulls it open, instantly feeling a tickle of good vibes. The beach house felt so warm and inviting; why does he ever leave it? He shakes his head: no, this was just the effects of Felix most definitely.

He had enjoyed his time with his family very much, his thoughts only occasionally drifting back to the mer. So he could rule out that most of the intrusive thoughts regarding Felix’s alluring features was because of their presence (their  _ abilities _ … which was pretty vague but he didn’t want to push the matter too much; they have opened up to him a lot the last two days, he just needs to keep being supportive and patient), but since he  _ still  _ had wondered what it would be like to bring Felix home to his parents, to feel their skin beneath him against the cotton sheets of his childhood bed, to see them smile as they played with his siblings and laugh as they flipped through embarrassing photo albums (he’s a simple man, a simple man with dreams of a normal life)… perhaps his feelings for them were more genuine than he had previously let on. Perhaps he would have liked Felix and wanted them even if they weren’t a bewitching injured mer. Perhaps they were destined to meet: like soulmates or something. Or, perhaps, he’s just losing his mind…

Nothing is out of the ordinary as he enters the sitting room, the house pretty quiet and eerily put together, almost like not a single thing was touched after he left. His brow furrows, not sure whether he should feel relieved or confused.

“Lix?”

No reply. Maybe they’re sleeping? He walks towards the guest bedroom, knocking twice. “Hey, are you in there?”

Silence.

Chan’s jaw clenched, recalling yesterday’s events as he braced himself for the worst; slowly he pushed open the door. 

He wasn’t sure what he was expecting: a form curled up on the bed, a crippled mer on the floor again, wind ominously billowing the curtains like a cliché escape scene… He wasn’t expecting an empty room and literally zero signs Felix.

But before he could begin panicking, he hears wet feet plopping behind him and a surprised squeak. 

Chan whips around, breath catching in his throat at the sight before him.

Felix’s lengthy blonde hair was dripping water down their forehead, tan chiseled chest dewy with splashes of freckles on their shoulders, and a small hand holding a white towel around their waist. There were little trails of water leading from them to the bathroom and there was a noticeable flush to their nose and cheeks from steam. They ran their other hand through their hair with a raspy, “Hello.”

_ Oh  _ they got out of the  _ shower  _ so that means that they’re…

“Hi- Sorry!” Chan yelped, looking away from their perfection with ears redder than the ripest of strawberries, heart hammering in his chest.

“Good morning.”

A fidgety giggle bubbles from Chan’s lips (does Felix realize that their timing is what makes their naïve comments funny?), “But it’s night time.”

“So... good night time?”

“Oh geez,” Chan laughs, maneuvering around the mer with his face buried into his hands, “J-Just get dressed and then we can talk more about this.”

“But-”

_ Too cute, too cute, too cute!  _ “Clothes! Please!”

* * *

Chan’s twiddling his fingers on the couch when Felix sits down next to him. 

“I didn’t know you were back; I would have brought clothes with me,” they said after a few moments, glancing at the man in hesitance. 

“No, no it’s fine. I just didn’t know you were fresh out of the shower and um- naked,” he rubs the back of his neck, “I was worried when I didn’t see right away.”

“I see.” A pause. “You get worried very easily; do all humans?”

Chan pouted. “I do not."

The mer snorted. “Then is it just me that makes you worry?”

“N-No! I just care about you and- and I would worry for any of my friends!”

“Then you must have a lot of friends because you worry so much.”

He opened his mouth and then closed it, not sure what to say to convince Felix but, at the same time, he has been told that his hyperactive mind tends to make him overly concerned about everything (hence the insomnia). So he just looks at them with a sarcastic glint to his eyes and says, “Yeah, sure; that’s it.”

Felix smiles, a humming noise vibrating their throat before quietness fell between the two of them. 

He just studied the side profile of the mer’s face for a while, their eyes scanning over the coffee table before turning to him curiously. 

“What’s that?” they questioned. 

Chan followed their pointing finger. “Oh um- that’s a camera.”

“Cam-era? I like this word: cam-era, camera.”

Chan giggled, picking it up off the table. “Yeah, it is kind of a funny word.”

“What do you do with it?”

“You take pictures.”

“Pictures?”

He turns it on, going into the camera roll. “These,” he said, unsure of how else to explain it, “Little moments of time captured for you to always remember.”

The mer looked delighted by the small box, snatching it from Chan’s hands to inspect the vibrant photo.

“That’s the fish market,” Chan said, tapping on the screen, “And that, over there, is where I buy your fish everyday.”

“This is wonderful!” Felix exclaimed, holding it closer to his face, “Look at all the little people and little fish!”

Chan smiles at their unrestrained enthusiasm. “Would you like to see more?”

They looked at him with wide eyes and a slack jaw, “There are more?!”

The man laughs, trying to gently take it from their hands even as the mer was reluctant to let go. Eventually they released it with a pout before huddling into his side as Chan tapped the arrow key to scroll through the pictures. “Yeah, see, here’s the docks. And then this one is of the beach house-”

The mer plucked it from his hands again, bringing it close to their face as they hit the button eagerly. “There are no tiny people in this one,” Felix mumbled.

“That’s because there was no one around when I took the photo.”

Their head snapped up, looking at him in a bewildered manner. “You took the photo? Where did you take it from?” 

Chan grinned, shaking his head, “Nowhere, it’s an expression. When you push down on this button, it captures a photo of what the lens sees.”

“Captures? Can I capture the kitchen?” Felix asks eagerly, looking at him with hopeful puppy-like orbs that the man would be powerless to resist.

His face softens, eyes crinkling into crescents, “Of course.” He nudges Felix’s hands in the direction of the kitchen and taps the home button on the camera, the mer gasping as a mini image of the kitchen appears on the screen, “Now hit the button and what you see on the preview will become a photo.”

Felix looks spooked for a second as a flash goes off in the room, glancing at Chan for assurance. He smiles encouragingly, gesturing with his head towards the screen. The mer stares at it for a few moments, before murmuring, “Where is it?”

“Go to the camera roll again.”

“Tap this?”

“Yeah.”

“And this is my photo?”

Chan nods with a wide grin, “Yeah, that’s your photo. That’s the kitchen, isn’t it?”

Felix grins, an enthusiastic trill filling the room as they whipped the camera around to show him proudly, “Look, I did it! I made a little kitchen!” 

Chan giggles, “Yup, you did.” A thought struck him, his demeanor changing to one of slight apprehension, “Um- would you- would you like to take a photo of us?”

The mer gasped, tapping the home button frantically, “We can make a little us?!”

Okay, so, Chan knew what the overly excited mer meant… He  _ truly  _ did, but the  _ wording  _ just made his skin crawl all over and a stammered, “Y-Yes,” escaped his lips as steam practically billowed from his ears ( _ You do NOT have a kink for this; stop it, Christopher, stop it right now).  _ With fumbling hands, he took the device from Felix and flipped the camera; a jittery smile graced his lips as the mer shuffled even closer, a surprised huff of breath blowing onto Chan’s cheek as they practically rested their chin on his shoulder.

The man suppressed a shiver as he mumbled, “Smile, Lixie,” and then there was a flash as he took the photo. 

He glanced at the mer as he felt them flinch back. Their pupils were very thin slits as they blinked rapidly, grumbling, “The light is not appreciated. I see black spots.”

“Oh! Sorry!” Chan muffed out, ears flushing, “I’ll turn off the flash.”

Felix hummed, leaning back in after furiously rubbing their eyes. “Okay, I am ready.”

He stiffened, wishing he had looked forward before Felix leaned in because now the side of their face was literally an inch or two away from his lips and if they were to just turn their head towards him even the slightest bit, the two of them would probably kiss and oh his face is definitely heating up again and-

“Smile, Channie,” Felix said softly, placing their hand on top of his and using the man’s finger to click the button. There was no flash this time, just a small flicker of a red light signaling the picture was taken. Chan was still frozen in place as the cute name registered, not even the heat radiating from their close proximity able to melt him… especially with their hand feeling so small over his and the bunching of their cheeks from their smile made his lips ghost over the soft freckled skin. 

His mouth opens, prepared to make a dignity-recovering remark but Felix does the unthinkable: they nuzzled their forehead against his and then yanked the camera from his hands. 

They roll away from him on the couch, curled up in a ball in the corner with a pleased grin and mischievous sparkle in their eyes as they open the camera roll and scroll through the photos. 

Chan practically wheezes, entire face a brilliant shade of red at how  _ easily  _ they could distract him (and they knew it too!). “Felix!” he squeaks indignantly, “You could have just asked!”

They just snickered, looking up to childishly stick their tongue out at him before returning their attention back to the camera eagerly. 

_ Why are they acting so cute lately?  _ It’s not good for his health: his heart can’t take it. But perhaps this is how Felix naturally is and Chan is just finally trusted enough to see the real side of them; maybe Felix is surprising themselves with their behavior, not having a friend before to act this way with. Either way, Chan is relishing in the playful attention so he decides to bother them back: stretching across the couch horizontally to rest his dark curly hair on the shins that were tucked close to their thighs. 

A startled chirrup leaves Felix as they stare down at him with wide eyes. “What are you doing?” their deep voice asks hesitantly.

Chan fights his immediate reaction to feel embarrassed and scramble away, inquiring in faux innocence instead, “Am I hurting your ankle?”

“No…”

He gives a dimpled smile, “Then I’m just getting comfortable.”

The mer’s eyes narrow, seeming suspicious of his intentions but not bothered enough to press the matter further. Instead, one of their hands unceremoniously fell into their lap before tangling itself in his hair. 

Chan’s breath catches as they delicately run their fingers across his scalp (of course they had to one-up him; Felix couldn’t just let him have this?), eyes fluttering closed at the pleasurable sensation. 

The hand pauses and Chan almost whines at the loss, lids lifting to see the mer smirking at him in amusement. “Feels good?” They tease.

Chan speaks before he thinks, a content sigh of “Everything with you does,” leaving his mouth before his eyes are shooting open and the flush on his ears completely spreads to his neck and cheeks. “I-I mean- uh-”

The mer’s expression is hard to read, face falling but bottom lip sucked between clenched teeth. They pat his head twice and then retract their hand. 

He doesn’t know how to feel: like he was kind of indirectly rejected? Or like he overstepped boundaries and upset them somehow? He’s not sure but Felix wiggles out from beneath him and Chan frowns at the loss of their warmth. 

“Wait, Lix,” he fumbles out, sitting up as they begin moving towards the hallway, “I didn’t mean-”

“It’s fine,” Felix waves their hands frantically, “I’m… I’m just tired and my...” their voice dropped to barely a whisper, “My lure is probably affecting your thoughts.”

The man’s stomach flips, knowing that even at the low volume, he had heard their ending comment correctly ( _ “My lure is probably affecting your thoughts,”  _ it plays on replay, over and over again. Felix didn’t think his feelings were genuine; Felix thinks that they are influencing him again.  _ “The infatuation will fade with time; your body will get used to the lure.”  _ How does he know what is and isn’t real? He wants it to be real, he really  _ thinks  _ it’s real. Are they pitying him? Do they return some of his gestures because they feel bad that they’re making him feel like he has fallen for them? Do they even care about him at all?  _ “I do not wish to be familiar with you…”  _ Have they kept their distance from him because they knew that there was a possibility of this happening?  _ “I do not want your companionship-”  _ They knew that they would attract him, they  _ had  _ to have known… Why else have they warned him time and time again?  _ “Christopher, don’t. It’s only going to make it worse.”  _ Is that why they are uncomfortable touching him? Is that why they look so guilty right now: because they know that they were taunting him? Getting close and playful and spurring him on to do the same?).

“How do you know?” he finds himself snapping defensively, faltering though as Felix’s once sad eyes darkened, features hardening with that familiar indifferent mask. 

“Because this is what  _ always  _ happens,” they say back, “You wouldn’t be the first being I’ve attracted; you are nothing special, it will fade just like it did for the others.”

( _ “You wouldn’t be the first being I’ve attracted; you are nothing special, it will fade just like it did for the others.”  _ They sound so condescending, like he’s a little kid that doesn’t know anything; like he’s a teen that can’t distinguish the difference between momentary lust and gradual growth of affection. _ “You are nothing special.”  _ Why? Because he’s a  _ stupid  _ human? A disgusting, feeble-minded  _ human _ ? He doesn’t know what love is? They just know it  _ so much better  _ than he does now?)

“Because I’m not a siren, I don’t know my own desires?” Chan questions spitefully, fists clenched at his sides, “Or is it because you think you are superior to everyone and we’re just easy targets to manipulate?”

Felix flinches but Chan foolishly keeps going, “Maybe you like to be a tease and mess with people’s heads because it’s fun? But I get it: I’m just a  _ human _ , what would I know, right?”

It’s the pained whimper that cuts him out of the angry fog consuming his thoughts and controlling his mouth.

Chan blinks a few times before it clicks for him that the noise was not imagined: it came from the mer.

Felix’s hands were trembling as they hugged themselves (the sight made Chan feel sick with guilt; they were trying to hold themselves together, like they knew that there was nobody else but them to provide a comforting embrace), bottom lip red and irritated from the amount of force their sharp teeth were applying to it (he told himself that he was going to stop them from doing that but now he is the one causing it; they are bleeding because of  _ him _ ), irises a molten lead and glassy with unshed tears (he didn’t even know sirens  _ could  _ cry; he’s a bad, bad, bad person for finding out in  _ this  _ way). 

He wants to squeeze the sorrow right of them, he wants to take back every hurtful thing he has ever said if it meant he could see them laugh and smile again, he wants to hold their shaking hands and kiss away their tears; he wants a lot of things… But he doesn’t deserve any of it.

“I- I can’t control it; I’m sorry,” Felix whispers, “I try so- so hard and I can’t control it and it just- it just brings out the worst of everyone. I didn’t want to hurt you but I did- I always do- I’m sorry.” They back away, Chan feeling another pulse of energy flooding his mind ( _ comfort them, comfort them, comfort them; tell them you are sorry, tell them right now! _ ) He stands up and takes a step towards the mer but Felix seems to cringe at the action.

“I’m doing it now, aren’t I? I’m- messing with your head again; I do manipulate y-you. You must feel so confused and frustrated; I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” Their voice was cracking with emotion, increasing in volume as the glow of their silver pools for eyes did.

“Lix, please, I need you to calm down,” Chan pleads, a frown on his face in worry, “You’re okay, you didn’t do anything wrong. I didn’t mean to say those things.”

“No,” Felix is shaking their head, “You wanted to say them but you didn’t mean to out loud; I made you say them out loud, I made you feel bad and- and-”

“Felix,” Chan says gently, taking another step, “Your ability- it’s really strong right now- I need you to relax. Breathe. Let’s sit down and talk, okay?” ( _ Comfort them, comfort them, comfort them; tell them you are sorry, tell them right now! _ )

“Chris, I don’t want to hurt you-”

( _ Comfort them, comfort them, comfort them; tell them you are sorry, tell them right now! _ ) “You won’t-”

“I will-”

“Felix, if anything, it's hurting me right now to see you like this,” Chan said, reaching out a hand ( _ comfort them, comfort them, comfort them; tell them you are sorry, tell them right now! _ ), “Can I- Can I touch you? Will that help you? I know it could make me feel worse but if it helps you, we'll both be okay eventually. I want you to be okay; please, don’t feel guilty-”

“Why are you being nice to me?” The mer croaks, “Why aren’t you yelling at me? Are you afraid of me? I’m sor-”

Chan didn’t try asking again, just gently grabbed their elbow and coaxed them into his chest. He wraps his arms around them, even if they are rigid and fearing to breathe. “We’re okay,” he whispered softly to them, “You don’t need to apologize; I’m the one who lost my temper and I shouldn’t have. You’re scared, right? That your lure is influencing everything I do?”

They nodded against his chest, an exhale staggering out.

(Felix was just trying to protect him from the conflicting feelings they may or may not evoke; they were just trying to protect themselves from being abandoned when the  _ infatuation  _ fades. Chan was too quick to accuse them, too quick to misread their cold demeanor once again. Felix isn’t mean, just cautious, always cautious…) “I really do care about you; I want you to know that, right now.”

“I care about you too,” Felix mumbles, “That’s why I don’t want this to be fake.”

“It isn’t-”

“It could be. I’ve never had a friend; they never stay.”

“I’m not gonna leave you behind,” Chan assured, “I don’t know how your lure thing works but I promise that this is genuine.”

“How do you know?” they sniffle.

“It gets weaker with distance, right? You know what I was thinking about the entire time I was with my family? I was thinking about you, worried about you. And maybe- maybe your lure may affect me sometimes, maybe it influences my decisions when you’re upset but- but I know that at the core of my desires… It’s just you. All of you, any of you. I want to help you, I want you to be happy. I want to make sure that your life is as great as you are.”

Felix nuzzles their tear stricken cheek into his neck, arms slowly unwrapping around themselves to return his embrace. “Is it wrong that I want to pretend?” They whisper, “To pretend that I’m like you?”

The fog fades. Chan sighs in relief but his heart beats a little faster. “L-Like me?”

“Human.  _ Normal _ . I don’t want to be a siren; I hate it, everything about it. I want to be like you, I want to be good like you.”

Chan feels his heart break for them; how can he tell them that they could never be like a human? How could he tell them that he wishes that he could be like them? How can he portray that he likes them the way they are and that they don’t have to be human to be good? He doesn’t have a clear answer, a definite solution. Chan wants to pretend some things too though: that they met under normal circumstances and have a normal relationship. He wants to pretend that they are together by fate rather than coincidence. He wants to pretend that this all won’t be over in a few days. Maybe it’s okay, just for tonight, to pretend that everything will be okay. Maybe they both need it.

“Let’s pretend, then. We can do that for now, yeah? There’s nothing wrong with that.”

It's silent for a few moments before there's a hesitant murmur of, “If we do, will you keep holding me?”

He pulls away just enough to see their ice blue eyes staring up at him with a sense of vulnerability. Felix looks small, precious, and delicate; Chan wants to hold them forever. “Of course,” he coos, moving both of their forms towards the guest bedroom, “I’ll keep you company until you fall asleep and- and then we can um- we can talk more in the morning.”

“Promise?”

Chan smiles at them fondly. “Promise.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, sorry for the wait. The next chapter is mostly written already (answers are finally revealed yay!) So the next update should appear soon
> 
> Thanks for sticking with me and leaving nice comments. I appreciate it. <3


	5. Climbing Into These Umber Galaxies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They were so strong, and not just in a physical sense either; Chan thinks they deserve the whole universe and would be willing to give it to them in just three simple words… but it seems that they already have an array of umber-colored galaxies splattered across their cheeks  
> (Cheesy, Christopher. Real cheesy… Is it wrong that the mental pickup line made him want to blush and giggle?).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a wee bit shorter than the others but everything should finally make sense by the end! Crash-course in Mer 101 time!

The sheets smell wrong: that’s the first thing that crosses Chan’s mind as the remnants of sleep slowly flake off and dissolve into the air. Any rational side of him would have wrinkled his nose at the distinct scent of salt cloyingly infused into the fabric, an undertone of botanicals that Chan couldn’t pinpoint and probably never will. And despite how unpleasant it should be, it was actually… kind of comforting? Familiar? It felt like the essence of Australia, the essence of the briny beach and pleasant people and his sister’s flower bed. It felt like home but he  _ knew  _ he wasn’t home because his sheets do not smell like this: not in Korea, in the place he grew up, or even in the beach house. It was different from the nostalgic scent of his mother’s chocolate chip cookies or the bitter hint of coffee that never seemed to leave Hyunjin’s clothes or the lingering aroma of cat food in Minho’s apartment; it made him feel a different kind of fullness in his chest. 

He feels content as he inhales and shifts on his stomach, hand gliding across the mattress as he stretches before his finger nudges something warm.

Oh he must be in someone’s bed. 

He huddles his face a little closer to the pillow, a sleepy smile stretching across his lips. 

Why aren’t they cuddling? He wants to cuddle.

He lets out a needy whine, tugging whatever limb he could get purchase on. There’s a short trilling noise in response.

Oh, that sounded like Felix. He must be in Felix’s bed. 

Groggily (and definitely  _ half  _ conscious), Chan opens his eyes to peek at the ethereal form of the mer; “Mornin’ pixie Lixie,” he murmurs.

Felix makes a pleased hum and he thinks that maybe they’ll cuddle him now but instead he receives a harsh flick to the forehead. “Wake up.”

The man yelps, pushing himself up to rub the tender area with his hand as the dreamy state is finally shaken. “What the-  _ Oh _ .”

His ears flush, letting go of  _ Felix’s  _ bicep and squirming away to put some distance between them on  _ Felix’s  _ bed as he tries to ignore the fact that it was  _ Felix’s  _ smell that he was enjoying and that he may or may not have just called them  _ pixie Lixie.  _ Curse his soft and cuddly nature in the morning! 

“S-Sorry,” he babbled sheepishly, trying to disappear into himself, “I didn’t remember falling asleep here last night!”

The mer was sitting up against the headboard with their legs fully stretched out, attention on the camera in their hands as they nonchalantly rotated it over and over again. Their expression was blank as they spared him a glance, “If I had a problem with it, I wouldn’t have let you keep sleeping there after I had awoken.”

That’s- Well that wasn’t exactly the reply he was expecting but he’ll take it nonetheless. But that also raises the question of how  _ long  _ he has been laying here while Felix basically waited for the guest bed to be returned to them (And, of course, was he snoring? Drooling? Does he talk in his sleep? Does he get clingy and sweaty and make weird faces? He didn’t do or say something really embarrassing, right?  _ Besides what you did a few minutes ago,  _ his mind politely reminds,  _ Screw you, mind. _ ).

“Have you… Have you been awake long?” Chan asked, turning towards them on the bed as they played around with the camera ( _ they must have gotten up at least once this morning since the device was clearly forgotten on the couch last night _ ). 

Felix’s gaze lands on the blacked out window briefly. “I think so. I don’t know, it’s hard to tell.”

“Ah, I see.”

Chan knows he should probably get up, even if the mattress is quite comfy and offers the tempting prospect of going back to sleep since the mer  _ probably  _ wouldn’t mind. If he recalls correctly, they didn’t exactly enjoy being up as early as he usually is anyways. If his phone was with him, he’d be able to make a better decision after knowing what time it is. Alas, that was forgotten in the living room  _ too. _

The mer seemed odd this morning, not that he could really blame them after the events that lead to his current predicament: their eyes were lacking their usual twinkle of wonder and curiosity, comments missing their typical dry but cheeky teasing. He wiggles a little closer to them, face lying on his hands as he looks up at their expressionless face. They were still beautiful, even with the red rimmed and slightly puffy eyes (he knows that they’d look even better smiling, though).

The dull blue is what eventually spurs Chan to carefully inquire, “How are you feeling?”

The turning camera pauses, but just for a split second as Felix composes themselves with a gentle clear of their throat, “Better.”

Chan nods with a small hum of affirmation (he could tell more was on their mind, but everything was delicate right now; you wouldn’t go pushing at a thin paper door, after all).

It’s quiet for a few more moments, then, “H-How are  _ you  _ feeling?”

Ah, there it is: some emotion from them, some telltale sign of what was buzzing through their head. He heard the hesitance in their tone, the unsurety and awkwardness, like they were expecting the two of them to breach the topic from many short hours ago but by Chan’s accord and now didn’t know how to proceed. Felix wouldn’t look at him; he could imagine that they were either ashamed, embarrassed, or guilty about their previous behavior despite the man’s obvious attempts to make a safe and comfortable atmosphere.

But the thought of the mer being more concerned about  _ his  _ well being and state of mind has his heart skipping a little. They were making sure he was okay, being considerate and patient. 

(Or maybe they were trying to deflect to change the subject… It’s hard to know all their motives when they keep surprising him every time he assumes they’ll do something).

Chan smiled, eyes crinkling at the edges with all the adoration he feels. “Better now that you’re better.”

Felix bites their bottom lip as they stare at him, eyes searching his face for a sign of deceit or humor. The man sits up, subconsciously reaching for the mer’s face as they freeze in place.

Without really thinking about it, he eases their bottom lip free with his thumb, the only sound was the slight stutter in Felix’s breathing.

He knows that he was looking at their lips a bit too long afterwards when the mer’s lashes fluttered closed and they leaned into his touch with a small sigh. “You’re awfully touchy today,” they comment softly.

“Well don’t- don’t do that to your lip,” Chan mumbled in reply, “You’ll make it bleed again…”

They swallow and hold the position for a second longer before pulling away to focus on the camera again.

The man gradually laid back down, noting that Felix’s ears were a light shade of pink as they flipped through the photos. This felt strangely domestic to Chan: waking up in the same bed, enjoying each other’s company without really having to say or do anything. And maybe the illusion that they are some normal people with a normal relationship will fade in the next hour, maybe it would fade in the next ten minutes, but Chan is content with just savoring these few moments together; he will pretend until the fantasy is broken from the cruel reality that they are  _ not  _ anything and the mer will disappear from his life forever in a few days. They may not remember him, may not even think his name as soon as they are returned to the ocean, but Chan doesn’t think he will ever be able to forget this or get over the perfection that is Felix. He’s whipped, so horribly  _ whipped _ ; his fate has been sealed.

“-you’re with?”

He blinks, realizing that Felix had asked him something while he was lost in his thoughts. “Huh?”

The mer turns the device towards him, pointing at the screen. “These people.”

“What, my family?” Chan inquires for clarification, smiling at the picture of him and his siblings hugging with his parents behind them and Berry lying by their feet. 

“This is your  _ family _ ?” Felix’s nose wrinkles, eyes widened, “Why are there so many of them?”

His family wasn’t  _ that  _ big, was it? It was just his parents and two younger siblings; he has seen families  _ way  _ bigger than that. How big is Felix’s family? Does Felix have any siblings? They did say that their species was solitary and, now that he really thinks about it, he hasn’t heard anything about other mers from Felix (no friends, no family, no lovers, not even an acquaintance; they said that people never stay, so did that include relatives as well?). 

“Well there’s my mum and dad,” Chan gestured towards the couple standing in the background, “And then here’s my sister and brother and my dog. My family is kind of average sized for humans; is… is it not like that for mer?”

Felix doesn’t reply directly, brow furrowing in thought. “You are all related?”

He chuckles awkwardly, shuffling backwards on the bed to prop his back on the pillows next to them. “Yeah..? My siblings and I all came from the- um- the same mum and dad.”

“How?”

Chan sputtered, face heating up, “W-What do you mean  _ how _ ?” He really didn’t want to give this very hot mer  _ the talk _ , not when they are obviously around his age (maybe a bit younger actually but still old enough to know how children are made! Wait- unless… mer are not created the same..?) But maybe birth is what they are questioning? Do mer lay eggs like fish or are they more like mammals with a live birth aspect? He almost snorts; biology is weird. 

“Are you not created through immaculate conception?”

The man’s mouth opens and closes, taken off guard. So do mer not mate at all? “No, i-it definitely takes um- some effort from both parties. Do mer..?”

Felix makes a small hum, setting the camera aside and looking at him with earnest icy blue orbs. “We do not need males for the same purpose as humans, if that is what you are wondering,” they reply, tilting their head in amusement. 

Oh yes, because that was  _ totally  _ what Chan was wondering, not whether mers die as virgins or anything… 

“So what about your mother? Does she just… get pregnant? No dad or anything?”

“We are born into the world and that is it: no family or raising or nurturing. Females give birth nearing the end of their life and become one with the sea soon after; the pup is left to defend on its own with nothing but the ocean and instinct to guide it. A father is not necessary, siblings are impossible, and a child is not really wanted because pregnancy is a sign that the cycle of life is restarting.”

Chan frowns; sirens are completely alone through their most vulnerable years? “That sounds… very scary.”

Felix nods. “We are a species of strength: if a female is no longer in her prime, she uses the rest of her life to create another mer with the potential to take her place. Only the strongest survive.”

_ Survival of the fittest taken to the extreme _ , Chan thought,  _ Although most of the time, a species with a low chance of survival during childhood normally reproduces in large or frequent quantities to make up for it…  _ “So you must have a really low population count of sirens then, huh?”

“At least compared to most of the other living things,” Felix rolls their shoulders, fiddling with the hem of their shirt, “But if you are strong, you have the potential to live for a very long time though… even longer than a human lifespan.”

What could be the evolution behind that? The nerd in Chan is thrilled with the discovery, curiosity making his mind run a mile a minute with questions and theories. And Felix is actually  _ telling him answers _ : no cryptic replies or avoiding the inquiry entirely. He’s probably grinning like an eager idiot right now but he doesn’t even care. “Is that how you’ve stayed hidden for so long?” Chan says more than asks, eyes lit up in awe, “Because the ocean is so big and your number of mers per square foot would probably be really small so you’d be hard to find without scouring the sea with a fine pick.”

“Our  _ relatively  _ low numbers are a benefactor, yes,” their lips quirk briefly at his excitement but it was short lived, their gaze darkening as they add, “But typically humans that venture into the waters of the mer don’t return.”

Chan feels a shudder down his spine, his smile faltering at the ominous undertone to Felix’s words. But doesn’t Felix live in this area? Their accent was a dead give away that they have at least lived here before; and they had to be here recently if the boat Chan had found all those days ago had just captured them near that island. Maybe they don’t normally come as close to the coast?

Felix is nice and still wasn’t hesitant to threaten to kill him so he was sure that other mers would have just slayed him where he stood; how come people aren’t going missing off the coast if there are mers out there? There must be something he is missing from the bigger picture. “But people sail through Sydney harbor all the time...”

The mer sighs, looking away in… discomfort? Chan nudges their knee. “That is because I am the only one who dares tread these very… populated waters.” (So sirens were still cautious of humans, even with how powerful they are; they would rather avoid confrontation in general and defend themselves out of necessity). Felix’s deep voice dropped even lower, bitterness laced through their mutter of, “And for good reason, clearly, since I was caught.”

“What made you come here if all the others avoid it?” (They knew the dangers and still risked it…) Chan stares at them in concern. 

They squirm, hand brushing his (the man wants to hold it but for now he restrains himself from crossing the boundaries that were indirectly set last night; the two of them still kind of needed to talk about that… He’ll stick to one line of questioning for now though).

“Since this harbor is free waters,” Felix mumbles, eyes on their toes, “I am...  _ allowed  _ to trespass without trouble or confrontation with the other mer.”

The man frowned in confusion. “Everywhere is free water, why wouldn’t you be allowed to dwell in a safer place further away from civilization and creepy scientists?”

Their neck made a cracking noise as they stalled time by shifting their head from shoulder to shoulder; Felix’s brow was pinched, like they were really contemplating the best way to word their reply. Chan patiently waits, only wincing slightly at their careless popping of joints. “There is a- a hierarchy among my people,” they start, tongue darting out to wet their lips, “With… groups and statuses and territories; rules? Lots of rules and regulations.”

Chan’s eyebrows raise in surprise at the word  _ groups _ . So no family but maybe friends to grow up with? Or was it like a clan sort of deal, guided by elders- (He shakes his head; he has really watched too much anime with Jisung…). “Aren’t you solitary though?”

“We are, to a point; but the lone sirens, the outcasts, they don’t survive as long. The strongest of mer form pods, and each pod inhabits a claimed portion of territory; more sirens in a pod means more protection as well as having access to the resources of your pod’s territory. Then there’s a social class within each pod, with a male leader being the strongest and ranked by strength from them down.”

Chan giggles despite himself, thinking of siren pods as gangs and like an underwater mafia (he has a big imagination, it’s not his fault). But then something clicks for him: Felix was here because this was not a desired territory and if they had nowhere else to go then... “You aren’t part of a pod?”

“No…” This time when they frown, they begin to subconsciously play with Chan’s fingers all on their own (it’s such a cute action that Chan hopes it becomes a habit), “I am.. very different from the rest of my species. I am one of the outcasts. Each pod is unique to adapt to their particular stretch of water and the challenges they may face within it, often being very picky about the traits a mer must possess to join their ranks. I do not meet any of their... criterias.”

That explains why they have never had a friend, then, if the only way to associate with others of their species was through joining a pod. It makes Chan sad to think about Felix being an ‘outcast’ to their society, wandering the ocean with danger at every corner; why don’t they fit in? How could anyone  _ not  _ like them? “How are you different?”

(Is anyone really  _ too  _ different to have friends? Chan has always thought of himself as a little weird and random but he has always been a peoples-person; he tends to make acquaintances wherever he goes. Seungmin says it’s because he’s an overly nice guy and that makes it really hard to hate him… 

But once you get to know Felix, their cold demeanor melts away to reveal a cuddly ball of sunshine).

Speaking of which, the mer squeezes his hand lightly as they mutter, “They… They see that my skin is covered in impurities.”

“ _ Impurities _ ?” Chan baffles, head whipping away from their intertwined fingers to gawk at Felix, “You mean like- your freckles?”

They slouched, bringing their knees up to their chest, “If that’s what humans call them, then yes.” Felix sneaks a glance at Chan before darting back to their toes at the man’s stupefied stare. “The rest of my species do not have them because they are a result from being too close to the surface... Just by looking at me, they know that I am weaker and that I do not belong.”

“Because you have freckles, you are seen as weaker?” Chan felt annoyed with the shallowness people could show; Felix’s freckles were amazing and unique, not a strength defining characteristic! They should be worshipped like a precious treasure! “What’s wrong with being closer to the surface?”

The mer goes to suck in their bottom lip but they seem to catch themselves, instead huddling a little closer to Chan like his body would keep them safe from the truth. “Others do not need to- to be really close to humans for their  _ abilities  _ to work,” they said shyly.

He tries not to noticeably brighten in avidness (was he going to finally learn about these mysterious abilities? Was he finally going to get  _ real  _ answers to what they entail?). He asks a tad too quickly, “What do you mean?”

Felix meets his eyes, seeming reluctant to share.

"You… don't have to tell me if you don't want to…" Chan adds quietly, just now noticing how close their faces were.

"No I- I want to tell you," the mer breathes, blue orbs swimming with emotions that Chan was quite sure he could get lost in, "I just- I just don't want you to think less of me…"

He adjusts his hand to where it fully engulfed the mer's, expression sober and determined as he says with a squeeze, "I would  _ never _ think less of you for telling me the truth.  _ Ever _ ."

Felix stiffens, back going impossibly straight, but before Chan can double think his choice of words, they melt into his side and rest their head upon his shoulder with a sigh (the man feels a flush on the back of his neck, his heart definitely hammering in his chest).

“All sirens have a song and a lure," Felix said softly, staring at the foot of the bed, "My- My voice does not work like the others: I do not sound like the typical mers and therefore my song is not efficient enough to create a full and manipulatable illusion of a person’s desires. I would be a liability to the pod, unable to efficiently protect myself and others.”

“Manipulatable? I don’t understand-”

“If a human’s desire was to be wealthy and they heard a siren’s song, they may see themselves on an island full of riches and all they need to do is jump out of their boat to reach it; they fall overboard and are swallowed by the sea, never to be heard of again as the pod feasts upon them and eliminate the threat.”

Chan blanches (he got lucky meeting Felix; what would have happened if he met a mean mer? A mean mer who did so much more than hum? What if he faced an entire  _ pod  _ of powerful mer? The gag was to keep Felix from singing but that wouldn't stop them from humming, would it? Either luck or fate love him, maybe even both). “A-And you can’t do that?”

“Not to a level that could make a dozen sailors hallucinate until they fall to their demise, no; I can make people happy, give them illusions to ease their thoughts but that's… something a mere pup could do…" They scowl, tone possessing a hint of anger (Chan can only picture their sweet humming before he falls asleep, not a murderous song of a bunch of sirens; perhaps Felix was more different from the rest of their species than they realized. Maybe, even with the countless threats, the mer never would have killed him or anyone for that matter. They were just as scared as he was since the beginning), "My singing is not good, full of shaky and unsure runs and a range that only seems to plummet instead of rising to a pitch that would blend with the others’ songs to make a stronger illusion...”

Well, Chan could attest that every vocalist has had thoughts similar to that before (once upon a time, he spent seven years as a trainee before debuting in 3racha); if he really wanted to, and had more time, he could probably teach Felix a trick or two on how to improve their singing; perhaps even find them a vocal coach. But if Felix truly had trouble controlling their abilities like they suggested yesterday, maybe enhancing their singing skills would be a  _ risky _ thing…

Nonetheless, he was still curious. "So do you sing better at a lower volume and that’s why you have to be closer to the surface? Closer to the ‘threats’?”

“No, I do not typically rely on my song at all; my lure is far more powerful than my voice ever will be," they replied, previous frustration seeming to simmer down into something more sullen, "It is how I’ve made it on my own for so long, even if it has also caused me many problems… The closer I am to my target, the stronger my lure becomes.”

Chan nods, jostling their hair a little bit from its position on his neck, “And what  _ is  _ your lure exactly? Like you always call it your  _ ability  _ but what does it actually consist of?"

Felix's chin digs into his shoulder as they tighten their hold on his fingers. “It’s a force of attraction all sirens emanate that makes humans feel enchanted by our presence: they see us as something alluring and ethereal, something to tie the rush of good feelings with and most have trouble thinking straight because they are persuaded to act on all of their desires and are lied to that they will succeed no matter what. Overzealousness consumes them.”

_ That makes perfect sense why his thoughts sometimes don't feel like his own.  _ The gray eyes: that had to be when the lure was especially strong like last night; or when the irises were practically glowing sapphires from withdrawal, that was probably instinct taking over.

“So your lure is stronger than others, yeah? How come pods don’t want that?”

“My lure is far more potent than the average to where I attract unwanted attention," Felix makes a strange cross between a wry snort and a grumble, "Even from other mers which is nearly unheard of. They can sense it when I’m around, they could be tempted and persuaded to do things just by my presence; they could lose themselves in their desires and then I would become not just the ultimate weakness to threats, but to my pod too.”

_ That also makes perfect sense.  _ That’s why the ‘friends’ never stay; that’s why Felix is self conscious about their lure and would rather just push Chan away before the man could figure out the connection himself. And, of course, Felix is some rare case of the species: if they were human, they would be too with their looks and voice and overall just wonderful presence. If they weren’t a mer, would Chan still have fallen for them so hard? 

Yes, a million times yes… Because when you take away the powers and abnormal eyes and lack of sustainability outside of water, Chan wants to hold them and kiss them and take them on a date and show them off to the entire world just the same. Not being a human is just an added bonus. 

“Well if your lure can do things like that, why would you even need a pod and protection? It sounds like you’re a force to be reckoned with for all living things,” he comments admiringly. They were so strong, and not just in a physical sense either; Chan thinks they deserve the whole universe and would be willing to give it to them in just three simple words… but it seems that they already have an array of umber-colored galaxies splattered across their cheeks ( _ Cheesy, Christopher. Real cheesy… _ Is it wrong that the mental pickup line made him want to blush and giggle?). 

“I can’t turn my lure off, Chris,” the mer scoffs, his name rolling off their tongue like the most beautiful of melodies, “It surrounds me all the time, it pulls living things in even if I don’t intentionally mean to, especially when I’m experiencing heightened emotions.”

“ _ Always _ ?” He gulps, trying not to imagine what it would be like if Felix had a panic attack in the middle of the ocean, utterly alone in the dark and afraid.

“Always… There was a day, many years ago, where I had entered the Bermuda territory by mistake and was so distressed about it that I attracted the entire pod (which is the biggest group and possesses the most dangerous reputation); literally the only reason I escaped with my life was for the fact that the heavy fog on the surface made lost ships a common occurrence and the pod got distracted by the presence of the sailors. My lure is as much of a curse as it is a blessing.”

It’s bad timing, he knows, but the man can’t help but smile in excitement and cry, “Ha! I knew there was something fishy about the Bermuda Triangle: all the stuff disappears because of a frickin badass pod of sirens! Oh Changbin and Seungmin are so going to owe me dinner...”

“What does  _ badass  _ mean?”

“Oh uh… it means cool.”

“Like cold?”

“No, um both- both cool and badass mean like… impressive? Yeah, that’s a good word for it: impressive,” he explains with a nod before glancing at the mer.

They are glaring at him; Felix’s nose is wrinkled when an offended “Hmf,” sounds in their throat as they cross their arms and turn away from him.

Chan backtracks, eyes widening in realization (he literally just complimented a group of mer that were going to hurt and/or kill Felix; he literally just openly called those mer  _ impressive  _ when Felix was opening up about their own  _ insecurities  _ of being  _ weak _ . He’s stupid, so hopelessly stupid!) as he frantically goes to add, “You’re a badass too! Look at you go: attracting an entire pod but able to escape all…?” He trails as he looks at them for clarification.

“Fifty-six,” Felix mutters.

“Fifty-six of them!” Chan cheers, only  _ mildly  _ astounded by the sheer size of the pod, “You’re amazing, absolutely fantastic! Who needs a pod when you are as mighty as the Great Felix?”

Felix rolls their eyes in exasperation but there is a fond quirk to their lips. “I am great: you know what I did? I enhanced my lure even more than its usual potent level to pull in the sailors on the surface as a distraction for the mers so I could escape.”

It takes Chan a few seconds to process that tidbit of information, gaping at them in both surprise and marvelment. “S-See?” his voice returns, that warm feeling in his chest at full swing, “You’re- You’re brilliant, too. Any pod would be lucky to have you… But they- they don’t even deserve you either. Alone you could take on any challenge that comes your way; with them, they’d be the liabilities.”

“But there is also no one to watch your back when you’re alone,” Felix says, a grim line to their lips, “The humans you helped me escape from… they were pulled by my lure while I was sleeping, poisoned me, and then captured me as their desire to prove to the world that I existed was only heightened by my abilities. I avoid trouble with pods by living in a heavily used section of water but at the cost of running into trouble with an even more susceptible threat to my lure.” The  _ ‘it seems like I pulled you in as well while on that ship’  _ was left unsaid. 

“They injured your tail,” Chan murmured softly with a frown, hand brushing their ankle, “How could they hurt something that’s so- so…” His ears flush and Felix eyes him in curiosity, “Even when you were threatening to kill me, I was too enraptured by your appearance to even think about disrupting a single hair on your body.”

A giddy but barely audible trill leaves Felix as they grin shyly, their shoulder bumping into Chan’s as they leaned back against him.

“Not all see me as something... pretty like you did; for mers, at least, the fact that they are attracted to something so imperfect frustrates them to where they want to hurt me. They don’t understand why such a weak and flawed misfit of the species is able to catch their attention as something to be desired when they could find far better than me if they truly tried. The fact that I resemble a man also often causes a violent reaction from male sirens and humans who are exclusively attracted to the opposite sex,” there’s an almost impish snicker that Felix makes as they add, “You can imagine the confusion and questioning of their identities I create.”

Chan gives them a sad smile, endearment in his eyes as he says earnestly, “Don’t call yourself weak and flawed; the fact that you are different is what makes you so freaking attractive. Your freckles and deep voice… They are wonderful and so uniquely you! They get angry because they are jealous that you get to look special while all the rest of them look exactly the same.”

“They are impurities-” the mer tries to scoff. But he is quick to interject.

“They are  _ beautiful _ . I love your freckles, they’re- they’re like stars dotting your cheeks; I could spend hours just tracing constellations upon your skin.”

Felix goes rigid, time ticking by at a remarkably slower pace than his heartbeat.

Finally, they whisper, “Y-You don’t mean that...”

  
  


“I do. I love everything about you. I think your voice is the most amazing thing I have ever heard: it’s so deep and soothing but can also be so empowering when you want it to be. I can feel your voice before I hear it sometimes, feel it rumble through my core; I’m sure your singing is stunning even if others are inclined to disagree. When you hum, there are times where I find myself slipping into a daydream that’s so pleasant that I just smile happily and want nothing more than to fall asleep right then and there listening to you for the rest of the day.”

Felix is staring at him with wide eyes and dilated pupils, cheeks a rare shade of pink and Chan immediately feels a bit sheepish at his shameless gushing for the other.

“I guess what I’m trying to s-say is don’t- don’t doubt your abilities; there is absolutely nothing wrong with you. It’s ok to be different; fitting the mold is overrated and- and I like the way you are. I really like it. I think you’re perfect just the way you are because being true to yourself until the very end is what’s important.”

They huff, completely flustered now as they attempt to hide their rosy face by burying it into their knees. “You’re too- too nice…” Felix mumbles (although Chan can hear the smile in their voice), “Nobody has ever said the things you say to me.”

“Because they are all pompous jerks! And stupid and blind and- and…” He flushes too at his immediate outburst, Felix peeking at him in surprise. He rubs the back of his neck and looks down at his lap as he says, “They are just wrong for not seeing how great you are…”

They click their tongue and squirm a little, muttering, “You are unlike any human I’ve ever met.”

Chan grins, dimple on full display as he feels a little rush of confidence burst through him. “Is that a bad thing?” he chuckles with a cheeky raise of a brow.

Very quietly and half to themselves, Felix says to their knee, “I wish it was…”

“Oh?” The man perks up, watching them expectantly, “And why is that?”

The mer turns their face towards him, cheek squished against their leg. Felix’s eyes are twinkling but there is an inkling of melancholy tugging down the rest of their features. “Because when we inevitably part ways, it would be easier for me to say good morning to you for the last time.”

His heart both flutters and sinks.  _ Nothing would ever make it easier to say goodbye. _

Two days… He has two days; going back to Korea and work has never felt so wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So in case you haven't noticed yet, each chapter is a day and the story covers a week's time with chapter 8 being an epilogue of sorts. But since this chapter only covered their morning together, the next chapter will probably include flashbacks to fill in the blanks of the rest of their day. I just really wanted this conversation to be the main focus of day 5 so I didn't include the other things.
> 
> Anyways, I really hope you enjoyed and, as always, thanks for the nice comments:) Your kind words really make it easier to write and continue the story because I know that at least one person other than myself is enjoying it


	6. Fishing Within This Rosy Satin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You could… stay.”  
> 
> 
> Felix just turns to him with the entire universe in their eyes, wide black spots in the middle of the ice twinkling with the white unseen stars above them; their rosy satin lips were narrowed into a sullen ghost of a smile. “You know that I can’t."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really sorry for the late update ':( I've been really busy lately and finding less and less time to write  
> Anyways I hope you enjoy this chapter!

There’s an alarm blaring in his ear as he reaches over and blindly presses the screen on the nightstand.

He sits up with a yawn, rubbing his eyes as he squints at the rows of notifications from the group chat. 

  
  


_“Straight” Kids (34)_

**Sungie**

Guys I think Hyung is dead

 _Sent 8:45 am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

  
  


**Jinnie**

Who?

 _Sent 8:47am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

  
  


**Minnie**

Chan?

 _Sent 8:48am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

  
  


**Sungie**

YeS wHo ElSe

 _Sent 8:48am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

  
  


**Jinnie**

Ya attitude not appreciated 

_Sent 8:48am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

**Jinnie**

But why is he dead..?

 _Sent 8:49am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

  
  


**Minnie**

Hello? Jisung?

 _Sent 8:52am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

  
  


**Sungie**

Sorry Minho’s cat had a hairball

Furry baby is good now

 _Sent 8:52am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

  
  


**Minho**

He thinks Crispy is dead because he never got back to him

About a song he wrote or something

He sent it, Chan said he’d listen to it

And then TV static

 _Sent 8:52am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

  
  


**Jinnie**

Oh that does sound unlike Chan hyung

 _Sent 8:52am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

  
  


**Innie**

Has anyone heard from him? Should we be worried? :(

 _Sent 8:53am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

  
  


**Minnie**

No

Hyung is probably just busy

 _Sent 8:53am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

  
  


**Minho**

Busy with his house guest;))

 _Sent 8:53am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

**Sungie**

UNLESS THE HOUSE GUEST KILLED HIM

 _Sent 8:54am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

  
  


**Jinnie**

House guest??

 _Sent 8:54am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

  
  


**Minho**

Yaa Bang Chan is getting some 

_Sent 8:54am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

  
  


**Binnie**

Really? He told you?

 _Sent 8:55am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

  
  


**Minho**

Changbin-ah, nice of you to join us~

Not directly

But the person was there when Jisung and I called him

Chan was very vague

But he had that smitten voice

 _Sent 8:55am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

  
  


**Sungie**

He was clearly whipped more than whipped cream

Which is exactly why it would be easier for his house guest

TO KILL HIM

Also, I’m surprised everyone is up right now

Look at us: responsible working adults

 _Sent 8:55am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

**Jinnie**

I think you might be overreacting

And I know right

 _Sent 8:56am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

  
  


**Minho**

He’s not dead idiot

He’s probably just having fun

 _Sent 8:56am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

  
  


**Sungie**

Oof baby I’m hurt :’(

 _Sent 8:56am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

**Jinnie**

Aren’t you guys in the same house?

 _Sent 8:57am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

  
  


**Minho**

No

 _Sent 8:57am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

  
  


**Sungie**

Yes

 _Sent 8:57am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

  
  


**Binnie**

… awkward o-o

 _Sent 8:58am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

  
  


**Innie**

Anyways… Hyung has a secret lover?

 _Sent 8:58am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

  
  


**Jinnie**

It would seem so

 _Sent 8:58am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

  
  


**Minnie**

Do we know who they are?

 _Sent 8:59am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

  
  


**Sungie**

Nope. He wouldn’t say anything

But he did call them a they though

So

 _Sent 8:59am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

**Sungie**

Actually I don’t think that helps at all

 _Sent 9:00am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

  
  


**Binnie**

Yeah not really but good try buddy

 _Sent 9:00am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

  
  


**Jinnie**

Has anyone tried texting him and asking if he’s alright? 

I’m really curious now

I wanna know who this mystery person is

 _Sent 9:00am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

  
  


**Sungie**

He cooked for them

That’s all I gathered from our last convo

 _Sent 9:01am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

  
  


**Minho**

Oi Christopher Bang

I see you read that message

 _Sent 9:01am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:01am (7)_

  
  


**Sungie**

*gAsP* HE’S ALIVE

 _Sent 9:02am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:02am (7)_

  
  


**Jinnie**

Show yourself, you secret keeper!

 _Sent 9:02am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:02am (7)_

  
  


**Binnie**

WHO IS THIS MYSTERY LOVER HYUNG

AND WHY HAVEN’T I HEARD ANYTHING ABOUT IT

I THOUGHT WE WERE FRIENDS 

_Sent 9:03am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:03am (7)_

**Chan-Hyung**

Yes, I’m alive

Yes, I heard your song Jisung

Yes, I have been busy

No, I DO NOT HAVE A SECRET LOVER

 _Delivered 9:04am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:04am (7)_

  
  


**Minho**

Secret house guest, our bad

 _Sent 9:04am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:04am (7)_

**Chan-Hyung**

No 

_Delivered 9:05am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:05am (7)_

**Sungie**

You LIE

 _Sent 9:05am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:05am (7)_

**Chan-Hyung**

Maybe

WAit-

No

 _Delivered 9:06am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:06am (7)_

_*Two messages have been deleted @ 9:06am*_

**Chan-Hyung**

No

 _Delivered 9:06am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:06am (7)_

  
  


**Sungie**

*gAsP GaSp*

 _Sent 9:07am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:07am (7)_

  
  


**Jinnie**

*gAsP*

 _Sent 9:07am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:07am (7)_

  
  


**Minnie**

Exposed

 _Sent 9:07am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:07am (7)_

  
  


**Binnie**

Smooth hyung 

_Sent 9:07am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:07am (7)_

  
  


**Innie**

You guys type so fast 

Oh my gosh

 _Sent 9:08am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:08am (7)_

  
  


**Chan-Hyung**

There’s really no getting out of this, huh?

 _Delivered 9:08am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:08am (7)_

  
  
  


**Minho**

Nope

 _Sent 9:09am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:09am (7)_

  
  


**Minnie**

You sealed your fate when you LIED

 _Sent 9:09am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:09am (7)_

  
  


**Jinnie**

YOU DIRTY SECRET KREEPER

*KEPER

*KEEPER

 _Sent 9:09am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:09am (7)_

  
  


**Sungie**

YEAH YOU SECRET KREEPER

 _Sent 9:10am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:10am (7)_

  
  
  


**Chan-Hyung**

Ok so I made a friend while I’m here

And they have been over at the beach house 

Big deal

 _Delivered 9:10am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:10am (7)_

  
  


**Binnie**

Gasp

 _Sent 9:10am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:10am (7)_

  
  


**Chan-Hyung**

Stop gasping

I’m allowed to make friends!

 _Delivered 9:10am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:10am (7)_

**Chan-Hyung**

WITHOUT sleeping with them

So don’t get any ideas Minho

 _Delivered 9:11am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:11am (7)_

  
  
  


**Minho**

Rude

 _Sent 9:11am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:11am (7)_

  
  


**Sungie**

Rude

 _Sent 9:11am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:11am (7)_

  
  


**Jinnie**

Rude

 _Sent 9:11am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:11am (7)_

**Chan-Hyung**

Jesus

 _Delivered 9:12am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:12am (7)_

  
  


**Innie**

Who is your friend hyung? Can we meet them?

 _Sent 9:12am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:12am (7)_

  
  


**Chan-Hyung**

Ummm

 _Delivered 9:12am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:12am (7)_

  
  


**Minnie**

Um?

 _Sent 9:13am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:13am (7)_

  
  


**Jinnie**

Can you not tell us or something

 _Sent 9:13am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:13am (7)_

  
  


**Binnie**

?? 

_Sent 9:13am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:13am (7)_

  
  


**Sungie**

ARE YOU IN DANGER?

aRE THEY HOLDING A GUN TO YOUR HEAD?

HYUNG???

SAY THE WORD AND I’LL BOOK A FLIGHT

QUOKKA BODYGUARD AT YOUR SERVICE _*typed in English*_

 _Sent 9:14am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:14am (7)_

  
  


**Minho**

No you won’t

You broke af

 _Sent 9:14am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:14am (7)_

  
  


**Sungie**

Why do you wound me hyungie :`{

I thought you loved mee

 _Sent 9:15am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:15am (7)_

  
  
  


**Chan-Hyung**

They are just some guy I met!

They are nice and pretty and-

Gtg byee

 _Delivered 9:15am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:15am (7)_

  
  


**Jinnie**

And???

PRETTY?? PRETTIER THAN ME???

 _Sent 9:15am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:15am (6)_

  
  


**Binnie**

HYUNG COME BACK

 _Sent 9:15am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:15am (6)_

  
  


**Minnie**

How dare you leave us with this info

 _Sent 9:15am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:15am (6)_

  
  


**Innie**

At least he’s not in danger

Bye hyung!

 _Sent 9:16am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:16am (6)_

  
  


**Sungie**

I TOLD YOU HE WAS WHIPPED

BUT THEY ARE NICE AND PRETTY?

I WANT PICTURES OF THEM

 _Sent 9:16am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:16am (6)_

  
  


**Minho**

Same

And if you don’t, I will come for you

And make your life hell

:)

 _Sent 9:16am_ ∣∣ _Read 9:17am (6)_

  
  


Chan sighs, a smile playing on his lips at the continuing of notifications despite them all being aware that he was no longer in the chat. He really didn’t want to worry them, or to be jumped by Minho… But would it really matter if he tells his friends all about Felix and how stupidly gorgeous their face is or how their voice is deeper than the ocean if he wouldn’t even be able to see the mer ever again? There was no point in describing to his friends his week fling (with leaving out all of the important parts like Felix not even being human) because it wouldn’t make a lot of sense and they would question how the two of them met, why was Chan letting strangers into his dwellings so easily, and what could have possibly happened between him and Felix that made such an amazing week literally nothing more than an amazing _week_. Having to lie about the risky truth and conceal his affection for the obvious truth would make his friends worry and himself sad.

_The one that got away_ would take on a new meaning: the half-fish person was the one holding the pole in this scenario, reeling in slowly but never quite hauling their catch onto the boat, and the human is the one desperately hanging onto the hook because he knows that there are many other humans in that sea but why have them when there was a magnificent mer within arms’ reach that nobody would dare dream of besting?

The human knows, defeated and bitterly, that he’ll never make it up onto that boat; and, he knows that the hook is so deeply embedded within his very soul that simply pulling it out is not even close to being an option.

And so, with a heavy heart, he also knows that instead of trying to wrestle for their lure back, the mer will just cut the line. They have other hooks: other flashy lures and irresistible baits and even stronger fishing line for an even greater catch. Hell, they could probably just toss their pole into the ocean altogether and easily grab another one from their ravishing arsenal of charms. 

And when they inevitably snare something new and start the game all over again, the human will still be there, wandering the vast waters, with their hook resting in his mouth as a permanent reminder of what was close enough to have but he would never be given.

Chan hates that he’s the human in this scenario; but if it keeps Felix happy and _safe,_ he wouldn’t ask for it to be any other way.

  
  


Feeling a bit sentimental now, the man drags himself out of bed and shuffles into the hallway to make breakfast and a much needed mug of coffee. 

As he rounds the corner, he’s met with the sound of soft snores and finds himself curiously peeking over the couch.

Felix is there, curled up in the corner with the TV remote still in their hands. 

Chan had decided to introduce them to the wonders of television last night, the two of them sitting on the sofa together till the wee hours of the morning watching old kung fu movies; Chan had put on _Enter the Dragon_ for posterity and nostalgia purposes, having thought that Bruce Lee was _the coolest guy ever_ as a kid, but the mer was so captivated by the screen and martial arts that he couldn’t find it in his heart to change the channel. And eventually, _with some forgotten number of Bruce Lee movies later_ , it was 3:00am and Chan had to call it quits with the cheesy dubs and turn in for the night. Felix had said that they wanted to watch the end of the film before retiring so the man had reluctantly shown them how to turn off the TV before heading to bed. 

It was clear now that Chan should have definitely stayed up a bit longer to make sure they actually _went_ to bed after the movie ended instead of just continuing their binging until the sun rose (he’s a bit of a hypocrite because if it was him in the studio, he would have stayed up until he was satisfied with his work no matter how many hours it was past dawn); he would have at least carried them to bed so they could be more comfortable… But now kinks in the neck were inevitable. Although, the fact that the mer fell asleep watching some old martial arts classics was a bit endearing… If the two of them were in his apartment in Korea, he would have totally cued up something worth the hours long commitment like _Parasite_ or, if he was still feeling nostalgic, the original Pokémon anime or- _There is no use thinking of what could be… They are not going to Korea with you and you won’t be able to see them here ever again._

Felix stirs, icy blue orbs cracking open wearily at the sense of Chan’s presence hovering over them a bit too long. 

The man’s ears flush at being caught but he gives a giddy grin and says, “Heya sleepyhead. Or should I start calling you Felix Lee?”

Their eyes narrowed at him, taking quick glances at the windows (which the man had recently discovered is how they tell what the time of day it is since they didn’t know what a clock was) before grumbling, “I’ll take that as a compliment; for being a human, that Bruce Lee is a badass.”

Ah, and that is how Chan’s heart skipped a beat for the upteenth time; he really was turning them into a mini him, huh? Felix was fast learner, obviously, picking up on social cues and phrases and always observing how to do things (except for the use of “Good Morning”, but Chan has a feeling that they might secretly know when to use it but just enjoys the playful bantering that follows their faux naivetes). 

“Yes, yes he is,” Chan laughs softly, cheek melting into the top of the couch’s backrest as he looks down at them fondly, “Why don’t you hop in the shower while I make us some food, yeah? Did you like the eggs I made last time?”

Felix hums in thought, shifting to fully stretch across the couch and pop their stiff joints, “The chunky yellow things?”

The man nods and the mer smiles. “Then, yeah.” They push themselves up off the couch, “You are almost out of clothes though; are you sure you want me to shower?”

“Oh! Don't worry about that. I brought back some old clothes from my house for you to wear. They are a little thinner, probably will fit better.”

“Did you want me to get them-”

“No need, I’ll go grab them right now from the trunk; go ahead and shower, I’ll leave them by the door for you,” Chan replies smoothly, grabbing his keys off the coffee table as the mer mumbled an affirmation before entering the bathroom.

* * *

Domestic, it felt so _extremely_ domestic. Here they were, sitting at the table, eating breakfast together: Felix fresh out of the shower and wearing Chan’s faded red t-shirt and ripped black jeans, Chan eating his food and shyly sneaking glances at the mer’s reaction after each bite. He felt like he was in his trainee days again, experiencing the morning after some cheesy crush confession and innocent cuddling just for the spark to quickly die just like Chan’s hope for a normal relationship did. 

Maybe if had gone to college, this would be like brekkie with a wonderful hook-up he snagged at a dorm party the night before. Maybe if he had time for blind dates, this would be like the success story where he enjoyed their company so much that he invited them over for brunch during the following week and they said yes with a bright smile and it was the eloquently written prologue to their new life together. Maybe if he had made a profile on some dating website, this would be the day after his wedding night with his perfect match, with his _soulmate_. 

Maybe fantasies were meant to stay fantasies, though; he has done nothing but become more and more of an _utterly_ hopeless romantic by having them.

“Chan?”

The man blinks a few times, not realizing that he was staring at his empty plate with a purse to his lips long enough for the mer to take notice. He looks up, a dazed smile immediately concealing his previous somberness. “Yes, Lix?”

“What’s wrong?” Felix asks, gaze piercing and alert. It makes Chan’s heart ache a little at how protective over him they appeared.

“It’s- It’s nothing,” he assured, features softening as they frowned at him, “Why would there be something wrong?”

They just look at him knowingly, lids narrowed like they were waiting for the man to give up the useless charade; there was no point, after all, when they could probably read his chocolate orbs like an open book. Eventually the mer relents and turns thoughtfully back to their plate. 

“I understand if you do not wish to share,” Felix said, voice a little quieter and deeper than usual, “But I’ll be ready to listen if you need someone to talk to…”

His smile becomes sad again, the small ache blooming into something wider with their considerateness. Chan is quiet for a few moments before he comments with a bittersweet tone, “Your ankle and feet are... looking much better.”

Felix eyes him curiously. “Yes,” they reply with a speed slow enough that it almost sounds cautious, “I should be able to return to the ocean as soon as tomorrow.”

The man fiddles with his fork, avoiding their gaze, “Are you… Are you excited to return? To the ocean, I mean.”

They raise a brow. “Should I be?”

He looks up, blue orbs boring holes into him. Awkwardly, he chuckles, “Well yeah, that’s your home, isn’t it?”

The mer’s second lid blinks; Chan feels even more antsy with the tension created from their unreadable expression.

“And what, exactly, is your definition of a home?”

He’s caught off guard by the question, words failing him and mouth falling open. “Uh- well-”

The man finds himself having to look down at the table again to organize his thoughts. “I don’t _really_ know... Um- like the place where I feel I belong? And, sure, I may consider Korea and Australia my home but it’s- it’s the people too, I guess? My apartment wouldn’t be the same without my friends, just like my house in Sydney wouldn’t be the same without my family. There’s this- this human saying that home is where the heart is…” he trails, knowing that he was rambling uncomfortably and drawing circles on the wood, “So- So anywhere can be home if the people make you feel like that by their side is where you should be.”

Felix crosses their legs, leaning back in the chair. "I don't feel like I belong anywhere," they said nonchalantly as if it wasn't such a depressing statement, "Especially in the ocean. I shall call no place by that title."

Chan frowns, guilt swimming in his gaze, "O-Oh, sorry for assu-"

"But I may call _someone_ my home…" the man stops as the mer gives him a gentle smile, "Only time will tell."

He swallows down the heart in his throat, a secret part of him wanting so desperately to be _Felix's home_ , wanting so desperately for Felix to become _his_ home as well. But he bites his tongue and gives a stiff nod of his head. 

Are his cheeks heating up? Are his pupils dilated? 

"I s-see. I hope you find that person…” 

The quirk to their lips fades quickly, being replaced by a sense of seriousness in a moment’s notice. The mer was searching his eyes for something once again and Chan doesn’t know what they want from him: it was always so difficult to try and guess what Felix was thinking or what kind of reactions he was expected to give. He must disappoint them a lot, huh? They always seem to huff or sigh afterwards. He’s just your average nice human after all: Felix could find someone so much better, so much more insightful and confident and successful and exciting. They could find someone to love that is _worthy_ of their love; someone that would be able to tell what they’re thinking without them having to even say anything.

And there: there’s the heavy exhale through their nose as they avert their eyes and Chan just feels a whole tidal wave of emotions threatening to swallow him whole. He’s disappointing them again; he’s not acting the way they want him to act. Perhaps they are looking for some form of _friendly_ fondness and not the one that Chan struggles to contain as it grows stronger with each passing day? Maybe they were just hoping for a sign that the man didn’t like them any more and they could triumphantly say _‘I told you it was all the lure’._ Or maybe they had hoped to see something more than the eternal state of gay panic Chan was constantly in because they actually lo-

“I would like to accompany you to the market today.”

It takes Chan at least a minute to come back from the spiral of thoughts and process what Felix’s very forward request was. And even after he did, he still found himself replying dumbly, “Huh?”

The mer placed their elbows on the table, peering at him over the clasped hands pressed to their chin. "I want to go with you. Although this is not the first time that I've been in a human form, I have never actually- um…” their freckled cheeks flush a beautiful shade of pink as they give a shy smile, “Interacted with your kind before… I think- I think that I would like to give it a try. Before I, you know, leave…”

_This would… This would almost be like a date, wouldn’t it? They want to spend more time with him? They are willing to give people the benefit of the doubt because of… him?_

The melancholy lifts, overpowered by his sudden giddiness and urge to coo at Felix’s sheepish behavior. His first instinct is to, of course, immediately jump on board with the idea because _duh this was_ _Felix,_ but there’s a nagging voice in the back of his head telling him how _horrible_ this whole thing could go; their lure was strong, stronger than any other mer’s… they could bewitch the entire market if they so desired. And if somebody was to upset or anger or disgust or annoy or, God forbid, _harm_ them, there was no telling what kind of hell would break loose as their heightened emotions make their lure turn up ten-fold. They are already going to attract loads of attention from their _easily pretty enough to be an idol_ face and slender, elegant dancer-like body; the blonde hair and bright blue eyes on a man with features of Asian descent would also be quite the spectacle. Oh their pupils too… there’s really no way that ‘blue colored contacts’ and ‘perfect bleach-job hair’ could cover those up… 

“Are you… sure this is a good idea?” They play with their fingers, lip being sucked in between teeth in their usual nervous habit; Chan instantly continues to keep them from deflating, “Don’t get me wrong: I would absolutely love to show you the market and introduce you to all the wonders that the human world has to offer, but what about your um- your lure? What if you get overwhelmed or- or what if people start messing with you and you-”

“My lure will not be a problem,” they said firmly, previous timidness subsiding as they locked eyes with him (there was a glint of something mischievous hidden within those irises that kind of made Chan want to smash their lips against his).

He shakes his head to rid himself of the impulse. “H-How can you be so sure?”

“I only cause major trouble when I’m super anxious, sad, or influenced with withdrawal. I will be fine.”

“What makes you think that you won’t feel those things once we’re out there?” Chan inquires doubtfully, his overthinking mind already going over all the worst case scenarios and becoming even more apprehensive at Felix’s level of confidence over their control ( _when they have clearly demonstrated multiple times this week that their lure was an untamed horse that the mer only had a single hand’s grasp of the reins on)._

At this, the mer grins and coyly bats their eyelashes; the man gulps as their naturally sultry voice utters in a sweet tone, “Because I have you, Channie.”

The statement sends a jolt through his system, the tips of his ears flushing a fiery red at the implication that they _trust_ him and think that his company will keep them _happy and safe_ . He would be like their protector _and_ their shoulder to lean on and the prospect makes all sorts of unbridled butterflies buzz within his stomach; he would never let anything happen to them (and he has a vague feeling that they would say the same thing in regards to him…) and, if only for a few minutes, he’s willing to forget his worries and just say _to hell with it_ . Felix wants to go to the market? Sure. He’ll take Felix there; he’ll buy Felix whatever they want. Maybe instead of purchasing fish for lunch, he’ll just go all the way and take the mer to a seafood restaurant: make it a _real_ date, an _official_ date. It’s their last day together for crying out loud! What does he have to lose? (Maybe a little bit of dignity if they say no, but did he really have much to begin with?)

Oh wait: he’s a coward. That’s what’s stopping him.

“Alright, Lix; let’s go,” Chan grins ( _good enough_ ), a thrum of jitters flooding his chest as he stands from the table and scoops up their finished plate, “But you’ll need some things first.”

* * *

“My hair keeps getting in my eyes,” the mer complains, adjusting the black baseball cap for the upteenth time and just succeeding in pushing their bangs further over the lenses.

Chan chuckles with a shake of his head, pausing in his meander down the boardwalk to turn to Felix. He carefully removes their sunglasses with a fond quirk to his lips, watching as the mer’s pupils shrink and first eyelids blink dramatically in adjustment to the light (Chan had been very insistent on Felix _not_ forgetting to use their first set of eyelids instead of their second in public; he also told them that they _have to_ wear shoes, a hat, and sunglasses. He didn’t want them to hurt their feet or become too dehydrated while they were out so it would be minimal walking and mostly shaded areas; the glasses and hat were to try to hide their ever changing irises/pupils as much as possible by keeping a consistent level of brightness. They weren’t fond of Australia’s harsh sunlight to begin with so they readily agreed to the glasses as soon as Chan explained what they did). He removes the hat next, using his free hand to push their blonde locks off their already sweating forehead. The man feels his own face heat up as their sparkling blue orbs stare at him, freckle-kissed skin glimmering with perspiration and slightly parted lips puffy and pink from being bitten. It wasn’t fair, if he’s being honest: Felix had no right looking _this_ ethereal after walking for twenty minutes in 32°C weather (he’s honestly surprised that there isn’t anyone chasing them down right now for a phone number or picture). 

Chan places the hat back on over their bangs this time, giggling as their nose wrinkles when he pats their cheek affectionately before sliding their sunglasses into place. “Better?” he asks.

Felix huffs and playfully swats his hand away. “I could have done it myself,” they mutter in irritation albeit the flustered edge to their voice said otherwise. 

Chan rolls his eyes in fond exasperation before trailing after them. “Yeah, sure,” he teased, “Then why didn’t you, hm?”

They exhale harshly through their nose, reminding the man of a vexed bull (although it was kind of cute when they crossed their arms like a small child afterwards). “Because you told me to not remove my _accessories!_ So I _listened!”_

He laughed and put his hands up in surrender. “True, I did. There weren't a lot of people around though so it was okay.”

The mer doesn’t reply but he can see that their embarrassment and frustration was very surface level, more of an act than anything else so Chan nudged their shoulder and pointed at the pier.

“Over there is the market. Got the camera ready?”

Their expression immediately lit up and Chan knew that if the glasses were off, he would have seen a dilation of pupils in accompaniment with their eager grin.

“I’m going to take the best photos your human eyes have ever seen,” they declared determinedly, obviously taking it as a challenge when the man just raised his brows in amusement.

Teasingly, he says, “Oh yeah, definitely.”

Their eyes narrow at him. “You don’t believe me?”

“I didn’t say that-”

“Well your eyes did.”

“Nah,” Chan replied impishly, his grin only widening when Felix’s lips twitched into an almost smirk at the realization that he was being a little shit on purpose, “You’re just seeing things.”

“Nah? Nah, that’s not me, man,” they give a crooked smile, “My vision is spectacular.”

_Oh God, something just jumped in his chest_ . Their lingo and use of human slang just makes him feel so _proud_ and oddly comforted (It’s more endearing than cringey, he decides). They are becoming more and more human-like everyday; and since they hinted in a moment of vulnerability that _that_ was what they wanted, the sight makes him so incredibly happy.

“But that doesn’t make you a great photographer,” Chan says, feeling like he could have dumb playful arguments with Felix everyday and be perfectly content with life. 

Their face goes blank a moment, brow furrowing, “Pho- Photo grapher- Photographer?”

“Oh! They um- they take pictures for like- like a job; they are professional picture takers!”

“Oh,” the mer drawled in understanding before their expression took on one of offense, “I could totally be a great photographer!”

“Mhm, sure-”

“I’ll show you!” Felix suddenly grabs his wrist and breaks off into a sprint down the boardwalk, Chan squawking indignantly as he attempts to scramble after them, “Felix Lee: the best photographer in the seven seas!”

He’s aware that there’s a stupidly glee grin stretching across his face and that he probably has heart eyes at the moment but he can’t even bother to care; he could get used to this, he could _totally_ get used to this. 

* * *

“Geez, there are so many couples around,” Chan comments, glancing at the pairs dotting either side of the bridge.

Felix quietly observes for a few moments; then, “Are there not normally?”

The man isn’t too sure about this one: has this bridge always been some kind of romantic getaway and he has just been too single to notice or is he just hyper aware of every pair because he could be considered _one_ of them today?

Wait- no, they are just a couple of _friends_ ; Chan is just _showing_ them around _without_ any romantic intention!

“I… don’t think so-”

“Should we hold hands like them?”

“W-What?!” The man’s eyes bug out of his head, face flushing as he stared at the mer like they grew a second head, “W-Why would w-we do that?”

Felix appeared unfazed. “We are a pair as well,” they elaborate blankly, “We are together on the bridge just like them; why do we not hold hands?” 

“Because it’s- it’s different! They are together-”

“Are we not together?”

“No!” Their lips press into a thin line and Chan adds frantically, “Not like them. They’re in love, that’s why!” A giggle full of nerves bubbles from his mouth as he runs a hand through his hair, “Friends don’t- um- typically hold hands like that, you know?”

He gets fidgety under their intense gaze, being unable to decipher whether they were confused, upset, angry, or disappointed. The mer takes a step forward, tilting their head slightly as they ask, “Do _you_ typically kiss your friends?”

“Huh?! Of course not!”

“Well, since we have kissed twice, it is established then that I am _not_ your typical companion,” Chan becomes unreasonably flustered by the statement, humiliated by the way his body noticeably stiffened when Felix flashes him an innocent smile. “So I shall reword my question: would you like to hold my hand?”

_Say no; say no, say no, say no! Your hands are going to sweat really bad; you’re going to embarrass yourself! It’ll be like a real date; it’ll be like you really are falling in love-_

“Y-Yes.”

_Damn it._

Their grin goes blinding, eyes scrunched up into little crescent as their tiny fingers eagerly intertwine with his. “Just another Aussie couple,” Felix declares with a firm nod of their head before tugging him further down the bridge.

_Felix called us a couple… Is the meaning lost in translation or..? It doesn’t matter; just go with it._

  
  


“Where are we going?” Chan questions after a few seconds of being dragged but the delight on his face is undeniable. 

“Closer to the beach! I am going to take badass pictures of the ocean,” Chan opens his mouth to verbalize his worries about such a decision but Felix tacks on quickly, “From a human perspective, of course. Transforming at the moment sounds like quite the hassle.”

He releases a subtle sigh of relief. “Yeah, yeah I agree: wouldn’t want to have to kiss you until you’re naked in front of a fourth of Sydney.”

A roguish look filled Felix’s blue irises as they threw him a smirk over their shoulder, “Maybe I like an audience.”

Chan feels steam billow from his ears and his lower extremities twitch at the heavy implication but he has enough common sense to mutter with a semi-flirtatious edge, “And if I don’t?”

“Then I could always find someone else to kiss; but I think you would enjoy that less though, wouldn’t you?” 

The man bites his lip, having never felt so much sexual tension before in his entire life. Were they trying to rile him up? Because it was definitely working; they were clearly sending mixed signals here! First calling the two of them friends with benefits (of sorts; not exactly the traditional definition), then not hinting in the slightest that they _wouldn’t want to kiss him again_ , just to follow it up with trying to make him jealous by saying they could kiss someone else? How far were they willing to go with this? Would they actually find another human to replace him with now that they knew that not all humans were bad? Would they hold hands and cuddle and kiss somebody other than him? Was he really not all that special? Or do they actually want him the way he so wants them?

His expression probably shows every bit of his inner desires and turmoil and confliction at the moment because Felix’s smile falters and they appear kind of shy as they face forward again. 

“You are overthinking; if I wanted to interact with any other human, I would have done it by now.” Their grip on his hand tightens, “There is always a reason behind me kissing someone; I am not foolish enough to submerge myself in the ocean at a time like this, let alone doing it in front of people I don’t trust so worry not.”

“Worried? I wasn’t worried- Why would I be worried?” Chan rapid fires sheepishly, feeling a little dumb for actually wondering if they would abandon him right now just to prove a point (he’s protective not possessive!). 

The mer laughs, something bright and beautiful that makes the man forget about everything except the feeling of their hand in his and the realization that he has the entire day to treat Felix like the precious sunflower they are. “Well that’s good if you are not worried; now come, Channie, I want pictures of you on the beach.”

Butterflies in the stomach make the man walk with a new hop in his step, joking in faux suspicion, “I think you just want to see me shirtless.”

Felix’s shark-like teeth glimmer in the sunlight as the corner of their mouth quirks coyly, “Depends.”

He cocks a brow, “On?”

“Whether it’s a sight worth seeing or not.”

“O-Oh,” Chan mumbles, trying to act calm and cheeky for a change but then Felix leans into his space and pulls on the collar of his shirt with their free hand. They exaggeratedly close one eye and peek down beneath the fabric, making him flusteredly try to wrap his arm around himself to hide whatever skin they could now see (okay, yeah, he has a nice body and has worked hard for it but that doesn’t mean that being exposed to this beautiful mer, who _also has a very nice six-pack,_ doesn’t make him squirm in vulnerability). 

Felix snickers, brows raised and lips pursed like they were impressed (but Chan didn’t know if it was a gesture with mocking or teasing intentions; either way, he feels bashful all the same).

“Humans call that sexual harassment,” Chan grumbles with red ears despite finding himself walking even closer to their side.

“Oh really? Even if you always ogle my body and, if I’m not mistaken, would probably enjoy it if I admired yours as well?”

“You c-can’t just assume something like t-that!”

“Tell me I’m wrong then.”

“I-” The look they are giving him right now makes any lies or hopes of denial evaporate from his tongue so he just huffs in defeat. “L-Let’s just get this over with.”

* * *

“You have to smile!”

“I-I am not a big fan of pictures!”

“And why not?”

“I don’t know! I’m- I’m shy!”

Felix giggles with a shake of their head. “There is nothing to be shy about, Chan; it’s just me!”

Under his breath, he mumbles, “That’s not reassuring at all... “

“Come on, please smile?” Their lips push into a pout, “You are very handsome; I don’t see what the problem is.”

Chan squeaks, form physically jolting as he goes wide-eyed. “Y-You think I’m handsome?”

Felix’s brow furrows and an offended noise emanates from the back of throat. “What? Of course I do. Have you even seen yourself?”

A fuzzy feeling fills his chest; a flattered grin breaks out across his face and he wants more than anything to bury his head into his hands and squeal like a middle schooler talking to their crush for the first time but he hears a small gasp and the click of a camera and immediately comes to his senses.

“W-Wait I wasn’t ready!”

“I never asked if you were ready, I asked you to smile and you did. I suppose all it took was saying something nice about you; a compliment can make any person happy!” 

Chan wants to continue being frustrated but Felix’s expression is so full of contagious exuberance that he can’t help but roll his eyes.

If seeing him smile for a picture makes them happy, he’d do it again and again for all eternity without question.

* * *

“Let’s stop somewhere for lunch.”

It had been about two hours since the two of them wandered from the market to the bridge and then down to the ocean, Felix snapping pictures left and right along the way with Chan posing as their model more often than not. They had given him lots of excuses why: anything from _“You look good in black,”_ to _“I like your dimples,”_ and _“I could ask a stranger but they wouldn’t look nearly as nice as you.”_ And the man didn’t know how to feel about it because, sure, he loves giving compliments to people and making their day with just a few words but receiving them? That’s a different story: _especially_ when it’s from someone as _pretty_ as Felix; especially when it’s from someone as _blunt_ as Felix. He knows that the mer is being completely honest when they utter each sweet statement; it makes him feel all sorts of mushy on the inside.

Although, he has noticed that on occasion, he finds that the mer’s eyes are not on him at all but rather the backdrop behind him. Their focus would always drift to the ocean when a particularly big wave crashed upon the shore or when a ship decided to pull into harbor or even when a seagull squawked noisily overhead; the longer they were there, the more distracted they became and Chan wasn’t sure what he would find behind those dark lenses of the sunglasses; whether it be longing, regret, nostalgia, or possibly fear, he doesn’t think he wants to know. Maybe they realize just how _close_ they are to returning, how _easily_ they could slip beneath the water and never again resurface; maybe withdrawal is kicking in. But after about the first hour, he thinks that it is more of an admiring gaze: Felix is seeing the ocean from a new perspective, seeing it from a standpoint that could actually enjoy the view and take their time to walk alongside it rather than feeling the urgency to plunge right in (deep down in a selfish place where he will never reveal to the mer, he hopes that they are considering how much better life is onshore with Chan at their side and would rather stay here than to return to the dangers and isolation of their aquatic kingdom; it’s a lot to ask for, it’s a lot he would never want to pressure them into. They don’t belong with him and he knows it).

“Like… in a place? With other people?” Felix questioned with a slight tilt of their head.

He nodded, biting his inner cheek. “If you are okay with that, yeah; lemme buy you some food and we can sit down at a table and- and be like um- like the other couples.”

“Human couples feast together?”

Chan awkwardly giggled at the wording, trying to banish the thought of mers dining on human hearts of sailors together for their equivalent of a date; who’s to say that merfolk even fall in love with each other or do romantic gestures such as that? (And do they actually eat people or was that just Felix trying to intimidate him by feeding into the wisetales?). 

“Sure, it’s like bonding time: we call it a d-date.”

“But we have eaten together a few times already,” Felix laughs, jumping around him with an unbridled burst of energy, “So we have been on lots of dates.”

His cheeks flushed, shaking his head and failing to keep the flustered smile from stretching across his face. “No- those- those were not dates! Um- like- we- we have to be in a public place for it to be a date. We have to um…” _Be interested in each other_

Chan has tried his best to keep them away from large crowds or overpopulated areas to keep their nerves and consequently their lure at a low manageable level but Felix hasn’t seemed to mind the humans mingling about. In fact, there have been moments where they have just quizzically observed the individuals’ behavior, not with disgust or judgement but curiosity and wonder. The mer seemed open to learn, as usual, and attempted a sand castle before allowing the tide to drag their feet in (Their actions reminded Chan of a child’s first time at the beach but it made sense since Felix has probably never been on the shore from a human’s perspective; or at least not with the intention of _hanging out_ rather than rushing back into the sea before being seen. It was awfully cute when they followed his footsteps along the shore, their feet being smaller and thinner as they plunged their toes into each of the divots within the sand; it was almost even more adorable when Felix swung his and their clasped hands back and forth as they kicked and splashed the retreating tide as it tickled their feet, always with the widest of grins on their face. The mer was so happy and carefree and Chan hadn’t seen them quite like this before; they really were quite childish and playful when they felt like they had nothing to be guarded and suspicious about. Did he make them feel comforted enough to just let go of everything for a little while?

He’s glad he could make their last day their best day.

“Be in love?” the mer supplies, cocking a brow.

“Yes-” his eyes widen, “Wait- No- Um I mean- like you can be but it isn’t a requirement and- and it can just be to get to know a person!” He giggles in uncertainty as Felix stares. God, he can’t speak normally to save his life! How is he considered the leader of 3racha? How does he even have friends? Why do people even respect him when simple eye contact with a pretty boy makes his brain revert to that of a nervous and shy ten-year-old? 

“You’re a confusing individual,” they said blankly before their lips twitch into a smirk, “But I like it and want food so let’s go on a date.”

Chan opens his mouth and then closes it, swallowing around the lump in his throat as he just nods infatuatedly and grabs Felix’s hand without really thinking about it first. The siren seemed to find amusement in that, trilling happily before following him back up to the pier.

* * *

“Can you um- Can you read?” Chan asks, the thought finally dawning on him once they sat down at a table in the far corner of a diner’s patio (Felix had insisted that their back must be to a wall so nothing could sneak up on them and that they must be outside so their glasses would stay on without suspicion and that they wound have to be in a seat that allows them to see all the exits in case they have to make a quick escape. The mer had said that it is different being in an enclosed space with humans than wandering out in the open among them: less places to hide, less people to blend in with, less eyes watching at an up close and personal level). 

Felix is eyeing the menu in his hands as he holds it out to them. “Yes,” they scoffed, “I am not _that_ uncivilized.”

The man winced, rethinking his choice of words. “Wait- sorry! It wasn’t- It wasn’t my intention to offend you; I was just making sure in case you needed my help to order something and-”

The mer smiled something devilish, even daring to wink their eye as they cooed, “I’m just messing with you; it was a valid question. I taught myself to read a long time ago since I would be forced to share the waters with your kind.”

His panicked expression falls. “Oh..”

The mer snorts, snatching the menu from his hands and opening it up with a sparkle in their eyes and ultimately leaving Chan looking dumbfounded for literally anyone to see.

He pouted in embarrassment, his shoulders slumping inwards as he attempted to hide his face with his menu. “You’re so mean,” he muttered in false hurt as a splash of color painted the back of his neck all the way up to the tips of his ears.

Felix made an inquisitive noise, immediately dropping the laminated paper onto the table to give him their full attention.

Chan refused to meet their gaze no matter how wide and beseeching their blue orbs became, wanting to keep up the act a little longer. He has to duck even further behind his menu when a smile threatens to spill across his lips as the mer tries to lengthen their posture to see over it. 

He also fights a snort of his own when their deep voice raises a little in pitch to question tentatively, “You still... think I’m mean?

The man’s shoulders shook slightly, trying to contain his laughter at how quick their demeanor changed when they thought that they actually upset him. He chooses to not reply for fear that he wouldn’t be able hold back a mirthful quivering to his tone. _How can someone so beautiful be so cute at the same time?_

“Chan? Are you- _crying_?” He knows that their brow is furrowed in concern and probably frustration that they couldn’t see his eyes to know exactly what he was feeling, “Chris?”

There is a tug on the table cloth and a creaking of a chair and Chan peaks out from behind the menu to see Felix sitting on their knees and leaning over the entire table to see his face. 

“I didn’t mean to be mean. I am not a mean person. Are you mad at me? I’m not mean, you believe me right? Don’t think I’m mean, Christopher!”

Chan is staring, along with everyone else sitting in the diner, surprised by how desperate Felix is for his agreeal that they aren’t mean; he’s also triple the amount of embarrassed though because everybody is watching them and he was trying _not_ to attract loads of attention but here he is with an attractive blonde guy probably no more than the age of twenty practically laying across the table in an effort to see his face while adamantly rambling for his forgiveness. 

“I’m n-not mad!” Chan shushes, glancing around with a nervous smile as he waves his hand in an attempt to coax the mer to return to their seat, “You’re not mean; I was just kidding, relax.”

“Kidding?” 

“Yes; it was just a joke, Lix. No need to climb on the table or anything like that. E-Everybody is s-staring at us; please sit back down.”

They slowly fall back into their chair, keeping eye contact with him the entire time and their brow still furrowed. "Have I humiliated you? You look humiliated." Felix looks around at the many pairs of eyes watching and the mer instantly slouches to make themselves look smaller, lips downturned and hands folding in their lap. "I'm not around groups of people a lot; I'm sorry for my behavior."

Chan's face falls, immediately feeling bad for his poor choice of words. They were just being themselves, just worried that they upset him, and the only thing he was paying attention to was the fact that the two of them were standing out as a bizarre spectacle to see. 

“I’m fine, really: you’re doing nothing wrong it’s just… not the normal,” his lips quirk fondly, “I would never be ashamed of you, okay? I think… I think you’re doing great for- you know- not being human and all.”

Felix perks up noticeably. “Really? You think so?”

He grins, giving them a look over for show before leaning on his hand, “Yeah, you’d make a pretty amazing human; well, except in maybe a pool so you could probably just say you can’t swim or something and you’d be fine.”

The mer smiles but there is a twinge of melancholy, opening up the menu on the table as they say, “That would be a good excuse if I were to ever desire staying this way.”

He swallows, “Oh um- Yeah... If you were…”

“G’day! Are you ready to order?” 

Both men jump in their seats at the sudden intrusion of their bubble, turning with wide eyes towards the animated waitress. She’s smiling widely at them and he can see Felix shift uncomfortably out of the corner of his eye. He thought that perhaps he would have to order for the mer, that perhaps they were panicking with the sudden proximity and interaction, but then they flash stretched-thin lips and poke a finger onto the page. “This one. I want this one.”

Chan watches as the woman’s breathing stutters momentarily, her pupils dilating as she gawked at their sweet smile, crinkled eyes, and charming freckles. 

“T-That one…” she said after a clear of her throat and quick blink of her eyes, “Sir? The steak and potatoes?”

He rolls his eyes without thinking, trying to suppress a snort at how _easily_ Felix turned her into putty. But in all honesty, he’s glad he didn’t because then the mer turns to him and says, “Is it good, Channie? Would I like it?” And he realizes that he was no better than her. 

“Um- yeah- definitely,” his ears are burning as he focuses his attention on the waitress with a grin, “I would like that as well.”

Her cheeks are a light shade of pink at this point, eyes glued to the man’s dimple and obviously feeling the effects of Felix’s faint lure, “C-Cook?”

The mer cocks a brow. “Are we expected to eat it raw?” It was asked in curiosity but Chan could understand the sudden squeak of embarrassment that emanated from the girl as she took their comment as one of sarcasm.

“O-Oh, um, sorry! I-I mean- how would you like it cooked?”

“Medium rare! Thank you ma’am!” Chan answers immediately as Felix tilts their head in confusion. 

“But I-”

“No, Lixie; you’ll like it, promise. Oh and two cups of fruit punch please!”

She opens her mouth but then thinks better of commenting and gives a mute nod before scribbling on her notepad and wandering back into the diner.

* * *

“You’re just messing with her now,” Chan observes with a disapproving tone despite the amusement dancing in his eyes. 

The mer scoffs innocently. “Whatever do you mean? I simply thanked her for the food.” 

His lips purse. “With a little flare of your lure? If I didn’t know any better, I think you enjoy the attention she’s giving you. She was practically drooling when you leaned on your hand as she spoke.”

“And if I didn’t know any better, I would think that you sounded jealous.”

“Jealous?!” He squawks indignantly, “Of what?!”

Felix tilts their chin inward subtly, just enough for their ice blue irises to peek out over the glasses and lock with Chan’s honey brown ones. “That I wasn’t looking at you like that.”

  
  


“I-” his brow furrowed but his skin felt noticeably warmer than it did before, “W-Why would I want you to look at me like I’m an easy lunch?”

At that, Felix straightened in surprise but a smirk pulled on their punch-dyed lips. “So would you rather me be looking at you like you’re a hard-earned lunch?” With a giggle, they add, “Or is it because you secretly want the girl’s attention too?”

“No, definitely not,” Chan shakes his head instantly, gaze serious now as he meets the mer’s, “I would rather you look at me like I’m the human being you're on a date with.”

Their expression softens, the lopsided twist to their lips fading into a faint smile. “How about we look at each other like that then, yeah?” Felix mutters as they plop a small potato into their mouth.

Chan smiles as well, a fluttery feeling rising in his chest as he sticks a whole potato in his mouth too and says from behind the partly chewed starchy contents, “Yeah, of course.” _I wouldn’t ask for it to be any other way… except for maybe if we could look at each other like lovers…_

* * *

  
  


“I will miss this.”

Chan’s eyes pull away from the sight of the setting sun sparkling against the ocean’s horizon to glance at the side profile of the mer standing beside him. Felix was leaning against the bridge, chin resting on folded arms and sunglasses pushed low upon the bridge of their button nose. 

“What? The view? The sunset?” _Me?_

They sighed. “Everything.”

He chews on his inner cheek, seeing the faint glint of sapphire flash through their irises with the rise and fall of the equally blue waves. 

Today seemed so _good_ , so perfect; he could imagine a lifetime like this. He could imagine every day with Felix. He could imagine dinner between the two of them, conversation between the two of them, sheets between the two of them, love between the two of them… And now, all he’s going to get is the ocean between the two of them.

  
  


“You could… stay.”

The whisper is uttered so softly that Chan both hoped and feared that the mer didn’t hear him but he didn’t dare speak the words again. He wasn’t ready for the rejection or heart ache. He honestly shouldn’t have said anything at all: what if Felix thought he was guilt tripping them? Or maybe they would find it as a hilarious joke or perhaps even a desperate attempt at assuaging his loneliness? 

But Felix just turns to him with the entire universe in their eyes, wide black spots in the middle of the ice twinkling with the white unseen stars above them; their rosy satin lips were narrowed into a sullen ghost of a smile. “You know that I can’t-”

“And why not?” He questions a little more emotionally than he meant to, a frown painted on his face and a whiney edge to his voice.

They huff a laugh as their lids lower a bit in weariness. The posture and expression was filled with exhaustion, weights appearing to tug down on their shoulders and corners of their mouth despite their effort to resist the urge to just jump over the bridge right then and there. “Where would I go?” (Felix’s tone was soft but a hint forceful, like they were trying to emphasize a point to him: whether it be because they wanted a certain reaction/reply out of him or just to end the hopeless discussion, he isn’t sure) “What would I do?”

_You could come live with me, come to Korea with me. We would never have to be apart again. I could support you, keep you happy and loved. You could meet my friends and family, maybe even get an intern job at the company. You could be my inspiration for every love song and motivation to come home from work at a reasonable time every day. You could be my everything; all you have to do is allow me to be your everything first._

But he’s a coward. He has so much he wants to say, so much he’s willing to give and to offer but… nothing comes from his mouth. And Felix blinks and turns back to the ocean as the silence settles over them once again, Chan swallowing every unspoken word he has ever wanted to say because maybe if he had chosen to be selfish just this once, the mer would have felt bad enough to agree. 

And making Felix feel like they _have_ to stay with him just so he could be happy wouldn’t be very fair, now would it? He would never ask of it from them. They can’t extract the hook; they can’t just release the rod (that would do more harm than good for the both of them). All they can do is cut the line and hope that Chan will learn to fish again. 

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... we got one more chapter and then an epilogue... You ready?
> 
> Also, follow me on Instagram @le_kunokimchi! I posted a drawing I did for siren Lixie:) I draw mainly kpop related things these days so I would appreciate the support!  
> https://www.instagram.com/p/CLIYyZ3sRIe/?igshid=1eqj4esfroa8t

**Author's Note:**

> Badass Felix is so under-represented these days. I find it hard to believe that the fluffy sunshine baby doesn't have a dark side (I mean have you seen him on stage?)


End file.
